Using parent and child spaces when heavily pregnant

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  • pogofish
    pogofish Posts: 10,852 Forumite
    Name Dropper First Post First Anniversary
    2) Morally, I don't have a problem with this either. People bang on about how they need the extra space to get the carseat in and out etc. (which they do) but, frankly, massive bumps are just as awkward to manoeuvre out of a car!


    Actually, there is quite a lot wrong with P&C spaces morally.

    When they first appeared in the UK, they were established under an interpretation of the American psycological construct called "Mom-Time", which decided parents were unable to cope with their child-ridden life without the continued involvement and validation of retailers.

    In that case, I would feel the need to question if any parent who felt the need to use such a space was indeed fit to care for a child in the first place?
  • bestpud
    bestpud Posts: 11,048 Forumite
    I wouldn't park in a disabled bay and I've never parked in a parent and child bay either.

    I always try and park at the end of a row to avoid idiots bashing their door into my car. If it's a big car park, I will park at the quiet end and use two spaces as you can guarantee someone will come and park right next to your isolated car! I've never been challenged for using two spaces in the quiet end of car parks. Out of courtesy I wouldn't do it in the busy spaces.

    If I saw an empty parent and child space, I'd probably use it if there was no other spaces, but not otherwise, and I would not move if told to either!

    If I saw more than one disabled bay and there was no other space, I'd park there too.

    I find people are similarly outraged when I use a disabled/parent and baby toilet to avoid a queue for the main toilets! I am frequently challenged for that 'selfish behaviour'!

    As I see it, disabled or parent and baby toilets are about access and it would be morally wrong to take one when the usual toilets are free.

    However, I do not agree that disabled people, or those needing a changing table, should have instant access to a toilet when everyone else is queuing! I really don't understand why people will stand in a long queue rather than use a disabled toilet!

    I know some disabled people need to go quickly but most of the time it is about access and non-disabled people may also need to go quickly!

    The problem I have is people thinking they deserve an instant car parking space or toilet, or even access to rides at theme parks, when in reality what most need is more space! If there is no spaces for anyone, then I'm afraid they can wait like everyone else!
  • bestpud
    bestpud Posts: 11,048 Forumite
    The only problem with parking at the far end of the car park where it is quiet is that, without fail, despite the fact there are loads and loads of empty spaces near you some numpty always parks in the space right next to you! Usually they are the ones that park as close as humanly possible and you can hardly get the door open. Does that just happen to me? I think my car is a magnet!

    Yep, mine is too! :rotfl: It's one of life's mysteries!
  • pogofish wrote: »
    Actually, there is quite a lot wrong with P&C spaces morally.

    When they first appeared in the UK, they were established under an interpretation of the American psycological construct called "Mom-Time", which decided parents were unable to cope with their child-ridden life without the continued involvement and validation of retailers.

    In that case, I would feel the need to question if any parent who felt the need to use such a space was indeed fit to care for a child in the first place?
    So, these spaces which enable you to get prams out of cars easier, to get child seats in an out of cars (which require you to get the door more open) - they're all a psycological construct?

    When i'm with my 3 year old - I don't need them. He'll happily clamber through a tiny crack in the door and get into his chair. It's a bit of a struggle sometimes to strap him in if the door can't open wide enough, but i'll usually cope. BUT - it's a real pain to try to get a child seat in an out of a partially open car door. Not to mention, it's sometimes necessary to park the pram next to the open car door for a moment, before I get him in the car.

    Now, if standard parking spaces were a bit more generous, this might not matter at all
  • Sambucus_Nigra
    Sambucus_Nigra Posts: 8,669 Forumite
    bestpud wrote: »

    However, I do not agree that disabled people, or those needing a changing table, should have instant access to a toilet when everyone else is queuing! I really don't understand why people will stand in a long queue rather than use a disabled toilet!

    Disabled toilets are designed for disabled people; until they are called 'Disabled Only' toilets they are free reign for anyone to use.

    And even if they were titled Disabled Only - as we all know, disabilities come in a myriad of forms so you don't have to be in a wheelchair to need one. Or a blue badge!
    If you haven't got it - please don't flaunt it. TIA.
  • bestpud
    bestpud Posts: 11,048 Forumite
    Disabled toilets are designed for disabled people; until they are called 'Disabled Only' toilets they are free reign for anyone to use.

    And even if they were titled Disabled Only - as we all know, disabilities come in a myriad of forms so you don't have to be in a wheelchair to need one. Or a blue badge!

    That's how I see it too, but I am regularly challenged about it!

    Not always from disabled people though - sometimes the disabled toilet also has the changing table in it and there is also space for a pushchair, so it is parents who complain as well.
  • fluffnutter
    fluffnutter Posts: 23,179 Forumite
    pogofish wrote: »
    Actually, there is quite a lot wrong with P&C spaces morally.

    When they first appeared in the UK, they were established under an interpretation of the American psycological construct called "Mom-Time", which decided parents were unable to cope with their child-ridden life without the continued involvement and validation of retailers.

    In that case, I would feel the need to question if any parent who felt the need to use such a space was indeed fit to care for a child in the first place?

    I'm with you, just perhaps not as vehemently. P&C parking spaces are a gimmick for sure designed to do nothing more than increase profits. I'm not sure their influence extends to much more than that though. I think it's more to do with 'A large proportion of our clientele are women. Lots of women have young children. How can we encourage them to use our store instead of the one down the road? I know, let's give them preferential parking'.

    Perhaps the problem is how they're being interpreted by a (small?) minority of parents? Rather than merely think they're a useful tool, a cynical marketing ploy that nevertheless can be used to your advantage, some parents seem to have assimilated them into a whole arsenal of 'parental rights'. This is what leads to a sense of entitlement (they're mine!) and outrage when others use them.

    To justify what is essentially an untenable position (they're not 'yours' and anyone can use them) some people use more and more reasons for why they 'need' them (they need lots of space, their toddler might get run over etc.). This is turn leads to the kind of effect you refer to, whereby people simply can't function normally when they have their children in tow. They believe the hype and begin to behave in a disempowered and helpless way.

    However, I do think supermarkets infantalise people generally and this is another example of that. My particular bugbear is the incessant automated 'Don't forget to push your trolley off the end of the conveyor' message in my local Tesco. I'm sure people can be trusted to realise that they've actually got to start walking once they reach the end of an escalator.
    "Growth for growth's sake is the ideology of the cancer cell" - Edward Abbey.
  • Sambucus_Nigra
    Sambucus_Nigra Posts: 8,669 Forumite
    I'm sure people can be trusted to realise that they've actually got to start walking once they reach the end of an escalator.

    Travellator....sigh.

    Seeing some of the people in the T shop, I actually think they might have issues with this. The people who manage to get round the shop, pile their trolleys high with food, and yet can't manage to pack their own bags and make the assistants pack them up - never ceases to amaze me. I always ask 'do you get many of those' to the people on the till and we have a jolly good laugh at the pitifulness of these creatures.

    Not that I go in there very often - only to get the 11p noodles. Which I bag up all on my own. ;)
    If you haven't got it - please don't flaunt it. TIA.
  • dizziblonde
    dizziblonde Posts: 4,276 Forumite
    Combo Breaker First Post
    I tend not to take the wretched infant car seat of many bruised shins and calves out of the car at all to be honest - which seems to be the big need for the spaces... hate lugging the flipping thing around - it weighs a tonne! My car's one you can remove the seats altogether so has a clip at the other side for the seatbelt as well to take that out - so I just use that to unclip the bit that goes over the baby's legs, and then unbuckle the baby from the carseat and pop her into my carrier and off we go. Hate seeing babies spend hours and hours being carried around in them like you'd lug a tin of beans in a supermarket basket.

    Granted, I don't have a child who'll sleep in a carseat like many - she hates being buckled into things... not that she can move anywhere - but it's the principle of it I think! (Basically I've got an arkward sod of a daughter - this started during her 12 week scan when she had her hand out trying to block any views and photography and has continued since her appearance on this planet)

    Our local Asda's P+C spaces are normal-width by the way... just with a pushchair painted on the ground.
    Little miracle born April 2012, 33 weeks gestation and a little toughie!
  • lostinrates
    lostinrates Posts: 55,283 Forumite
    I've been Money Tipped!
    SandC wrote: »
    There aren't very many of those spaces at the Asda I use but no, I'd have no problem with a heavily pregnant lady using them.

    I have more of an issue in supermarket car parks with those people who buy big vehicles (often those high 4 wheel drive things) and can't or won't park them properly and end up halfway over the next space too. If you are concerned about your car being scratched by the one next to you then go right over to the back where there are usually hardly any other vehicles around. But that would mean having a walk of, oooh, a couple of minutes wouldn't it?

    I have. Four wheel drive. We are a one car hpuehold and its a working car, we need a fourwheel drive. We park i. The bays but they are barely wide enough. I have had to wait beore for some one who has arrived after me to return and move their car parked close on the line to my drovers side so i can leave. I had never thought of parking in two bays, nor do i think i would have the gumption too, but its a ruddy good idea imo.Fwiw i would not park in a parent and child bay either, but my fav spots are the first one next to them fow the width.
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