Hoarding...not just on TV

Byatt

365days wrote: »

Hi All,

Apprentice hoarder here hoping not to graduate!

been lurking for a while and just had to pop in and say to Byatt 'Reread your signature' !! It's great.

Hi and welcome,

Thanks for the reminder, you know, I needed that. xx

whitewing

If it is any consolation byatt, my family are exactly the same. They have a particular (wrong) perception of me that they refuse to budge from. Once, when my husband was sticking up for me, my aunt looked at him sadly and said, 'No, she's even turning you against us'. Worst was that she meant it, she could not entertain the notion that he thinks she was absolutely wrong in her perception, and also that he thought I should be more important to them than he is to them. He was shaking with anger after she went; he was so furious on my behalf.

Byatt

whitewing wrote: »

If it is any consolation byatt, my family are exactly the same. They have a particular (wrong) perception of me that they refuse to budge from. Once, when my husband was sticking up for me, my aunt looked at him sadly and said, 'No, she's even turning you against us'. Worst was that she meant it, she could not entertain the notion that he thinks she was absolutely wrong in her perception, and also that he thought I should be more important to them than he is to them. He was shaking with anger after she went; he was so furious on my behalf.

Thanks for sharing that WW, :A That's it exactly, and I have to fight hard with myself not to fall into the trap of thinking they are right. Thank goodness I have some very good friends. It's really good your husband can see through them and yes, it's bizarre how these people think even your husband should be against you! Families! :eek:

365days

The older i get I care less and less of what people think of me. I know that everyday I am becoming more of the person i want to be so, for me, thats all that matters. I know that not everyone will like me just as I don't like everyone I meet. We are fed a diet of 'happy families' and 'great social networks' in the media, but don't believe the hype!

katep23

Hugs Byatt, you really don't deserve all that carp; also hugs to anyone else dealing with family issues x

Byatt

Thanks Kate. xx

On the good side, I've decluttered some weight! I'm not dieting but changing my diet and not weighing myself all the time, just occasionally, but somehow I've managed to lose 4-5lbs in about a month. Slow but permanent I hope. And I've not felt deprived, even had the occasional chocolate bar!

katep23

Well done with the weight loss, I really do think these things are all linked to our mental health and thus to hoarding.

Am taking some time to re-evaluate my life at present and expect some big changes to take place soon.

Things have / are coming to a head in a number of areas of my life and I cannot continue as I am so have to face up to it instead of burying my head in the sand. New, exciting, scary times ahead I think!

365days

Agreed Katep

My friends always used to know the state of my mind from the state of my car. Talking of which, does your clutter spread to your car. Mine's a state.

katep23

Uh huh, car is full of extra strong mint wrappers, various chargers, spare shoes and half my wardrobe! Plus my "emergency" kit in case I breakdown (must add water and granola bars etc to it as I would be lovely and warm but blinking hungry / thirsty!)

thriftwizard

does your clutter spread to your car. Mine's a state.

Yes. Mine currently looks relatively tidy, apart from the odd road atlas, bottles of water & card games for the teens for long journeys, but under the parcel shelf there's a bale of straw (it's a big car! and OH has filled my bale store up with damp wood) two dead sewing machines on the way to the dump & a big box of broken glass, also on its way out. Heaven only knows why OH had happily made a large pile of broken glass & tiles, behind one of the dustbins...? From the amount, it's been growing there for months! But what really worries me is the spider, a big orange beastie that likes to make a web over the passenger side of the windscreen. It's been evicted about 6 time so far, and moved anything up to 30 feet away, but somehow finds its way back in, probably through the air vents, & rebuilds the web overnight. So I have a car that looks like something out of a horror movie...