Hoarding...not just on TV

whitewing

We stayed up until 1 watching the Olympic Opening Ceremony and then my daughter got me up at the crack of dawn. She's pootling around happy as anything and I feel dreadful still!

I think I'm going to get some plastic boxes to split DD's toys into different categories. A lot are inherited from her older brother so have broken wheels etc so maybe I will be able to persuade them to throw out the broken ones. The other stuff will be more accessible and exciting. Children just accumulate tat and rubbish along the way, don't they?

Her highchair can go too. We only use it to put cups on when we're watching TV. You just get so used to things that you can't see it.

My aunty is now prepared to auction small pieces of furniture too which is a bit of step forward. But she wants to do this gradually so other family members won't notice and make a fuss. It is her stuff but others will want to interfere as it is always much easier to control someone else's life than your own.

I used to worry that I would start something and then get really overwhelmed and demotivated. Since I have been on MSE a bit longer, I realise that it comes in waves with me. If I begin to feel negative, sometimes I can jolly myself along. Other times I have to just ride it out, but keep it in mind as a 'family goal' to come back too. That works better for me than giving up. We also list our family goals in a folder. So sometimes DH will unexpectedly start one of those jobs (e.g. clearing out the entrance hall which is mostly his and DS's stuff). That then can kick start me again.

I need to let my university course notes go. I actually almost feel that I don't exist if I don't have paperwork that backs up that I did something. I used to dream that I had never finished my degree but had used it to get jobs in unrelated fields. One time the dream was so convincing I had to go and find my certificate to make sure. I think I keep the massive folders of notes partly because my parents were so resistant to me going to uni that I need them as evidence that I could handle difficult work. But DH has been making noises that I could free up some space there. I have to say that I have not really looked at them, except one time when we were moving them my DH was flicking through them and said 'How can your parents not be really proud of you for doing this?' I think at that point it became their problem that they weren't, rather than my problem that I could ever achieve enough to make them proud. I was the first in my family to go to uni.

alec_eiffel

Hi whitewing,

Ikwym about the fear of overwhelm leading to not doing anything. I used to be the same. I learned a lot from Flylady (not the thread here which just confuses me as it seems very complex) and even though it was really difficult I did start to use the timer. It really helped me to get out of the "binge declutter" cycle I was in - get rid of loads of stuff then wear myself out physically and mentally then do nothing for weeks then do another full day then wear myself out, repeat until madness descends...

Byatt

Whitwing, not sure if I've said this before, but can you scan your work and save on a CD/memory stick?

Alec, you are spot on about the "binge decluttering", another phrase to add to cat-flapping and de-Richarding, I do too much then feel wasted. I'll give the timer a try.

Brighton_belle

Byatt wrote: »

Whitwing, not sure if I've said this before, but can you scan your work and save on a CD/memory stick?

I think the danger in this is just defering 'letting go and moving on'. Holding endless bumf and stuff electronically still has the potential to clutter the mind and tie you to the past and all the emotions attached to it rather that truely breaking free.
Scanning 3 years of notes could also take long time and be a real effort.

alec_eiffel

With the uni stuff could you just have your dissertation or main essays professionally bound? That's the "evidence" of your hard work if you need something external. The notes and prep work are bits of what other people have produced, your work is how it's brought together.

skipsmum

so sorry...I always lurk on this post and Ive just accidently reported someones post as spam....I've got no idea how to unspam it, really sorry

Brighton_belle

skipsmum wrote: »

so sorry...I always lurk on this post and Ive just accidently reported someones post as spam....I've got no idea how to unspam it, really sorry

Don't worry Skipsmum, I think the mods would realise it is an error.
Do delurk again though and tell us where you are at with your clutter, or coping with someone elses.:D

whitewing

I've found the comments on my uni stuff all very useful. I don't actually know if I have my dissertation still. I got a first for the dissertation!

There would be value in storing on a memory stick in terms of the huge amount of space it would free up. And I have a fairly decent scanner, so even if it took me some time, it could still be worth it.

I think if I really can't bring myself to chuck it, then I will scan it and chuck the papers. Part of me thinks it will inspire my daughter. But then, it doesn't seem to have inspired my son so perhaps it is delusion rather than optimism. And if it got to the point that I wasn't doing scanning or chucking then I will bring myself back here for a kick up the proverbial.

Hmm. Delusion or optimism? Perhaps that needs to be a question in our decision making processes!

Byatt

Whitewing, sorry, I didn't realise it was the notes, (BB is right) I thought it was the completed essays. My mind is one tracked at times as I have just kept my essays. I did keep my notes for a short while (I didn't do a degree until 2005/06)...but decided to shred last year. I lost my essays for the Access course which I really regret because it was the first proper time back to studying after leaving school and I was amazed how good they were when I read through them again, so much so I thought was that me?! But my PC got damaged and everything lost (I asked about hard copies at the college but they couldn't find them). Anyway, maybe the notes need to go, and just keep the essays and dissertation, well done btw.

Skipsmum, don't worry, I've done that more than once. I think you can unspam, but not sure how, but don't worry!

sjprmc01

Grr despite having very clean bathrooms and dishes all done floors clean etc (by OH When I was at work) it feels like no progress has been made.

I actually hate when he has done stuff to the house coz he would rather just chuck anything out of sight than check through it and see what is needed/junk so no doubt I will find a stash of something in a cupboard next time I check.

The ONE thing he didn't do was get dds birthday bike in the shed (it's been living in my hall for 1.5weeks and I seem to be allergic to whatever the tyres are coated with)

Not happy!

Eta : actually, since I just struggled to find a pot lid in the kitchen cupboard I have made OH chuck a manky old George foreman that I don't think would be possible to get clean and has lived in the cupboard for at least 6yrs unused, 5 unused mugs from old sets/work, the bowl part of an old scale and a manual juicer that was OHs that is never used. Can't say I feel good about it but it's done!