Relocating overseas

Kalama

Hey,

We moved abroad six years ago (to Pakistan) and are now in Kenya. It was the best decision we ever made. Our adventure ends next year so are starting to look to other end of the journey you have just started!

Your family in the UK will adapt. Skype is the world's most brilliant invention - invest in a decent webcam and your parents will be able to see you all whenever they want. We have found that now, when we do see our family, we make so much more of the time together than we did when in the UK. Another thing that may help is pointing out to your parents that they can come out to you - both my mum and dad and my in-laws felt a lot better once they had been to see us and could clearly picture where we were and what our lives were like (for Kenya - they didn't come out to Pakistan).

Your children will really, really benefit from the experience. Socially, culturally and educationally you will be giving them an amazing gift. The international schools are an incredibly high standard of education.

A word of advice - if you decide to go for the familiarisation visit, get someone to take you to the supermarket. It will give you an idea of what's available and if there is anything you can't live without (so you can bring it out from the UK). We tend to fly back here with suitcases stuffed with decent baking chocolate and smoked paprika. I know that sounds daft, but having little comforts is important to coping with the inevitable home sickness that you will sometimes suffer.

In regard to your dog - whichever government department it is which now deals with animal exports/imports has changed the rules so that on your return, your dog won't necessarily have to go through quarantine. As soon as you decide whether or not to take the offer, get onto your vet to sort out a vaccination schedule/passport etc.

If you have any more questions, let me know!

lostinrates

Moominmamma, with regard to your mothers....

If your children had an amazing once in a lifetime not longterm opportunity would you want them to turn it down so you could be near them?

The animals is harder. When we worked overseas in europe we simply put the cats in the car and went, dh and i, and my parents took cats and dogs withthem. Imo, unless the move is longer term...i.e. longer than the life of the pet,i would prefer a loving family member to have them for us if we went further afield. Thats the hardest part, and why we are still here atm. We have considered dh being based further afield with him coming home for a week every three months, or two weeks every six and me going out there for a week at half way points, but have so far not wanted that option as a first choice.

Moominmamma

Thanks Kalama, some really useful advice there, although I don't think I'll be able to go if I can't get decent chocolate

Are you looking forward to coming back?

lostinrates, no, in answer to your question I want my kids to grab any opportunities that come their way with both hands. Logically I know that I can't not go just because of my mum, but I am a bit of a people pleaser I guess, I loathe conflict and am dreading her reaction should we decide to go Another thing is that she won't fly. She doesn't even like being driven!

As far as the animals go, there's no way I would take my cats, who are used to a semi-rural kind of life, to a big city, am really hoping we can find someone to sort of foster them for us... I can't leave our dog here mostly because no one would have him, lol, but lots of things I've read suggest the Koreans are terrified of even tiny dogs so not quite sure how well having a mahoosive, hairy maniac in tow is going to pan out :rotfl: Animals are such a tie, aren't they, but having said that I wouldn't be without them. I've also come across a Pet-Sitting Group in Seoul on FB so might see if I can join and garner some tips!

Kalama

Moominmamma wrote: »

Thanks Kalama, some really useful advice there, although I don't think I'll be able to go if I can't get decent chocolate

Are you looking forward to coming back?

We can get decent chocolate here, it just costs the earth and we can't be sure it is nut free (hubby has an allergy). Hence bringing back as much as I can jam in the gaps!

We are looking forward to coming back. I am changing careers so am excited to do that, we will be buying our first house etc and we're at the age when all our friends are starting to sprog (we might attempt something similar....:eek:).
That and 7 years is a reasonable time away. I left the UK when I was 23 so I have spent most of my twenties overseas. It is crazy the things you miss (Saturday night telly!) but the benefits really outweigh it all. That and you know it is for a defined period and you will have assistance moving back at the end.

In terms of Koreans not liking your dog - we were told the same thing about Kenyans. Some of them do cross the road when they see me coming (we have a lab) but most seem to love her. Take what you read with a pinch of salt...

lostinrates

We knew a lot of south koreans, but in London. Its true most of them were scared of our giant breed dogs, but also curious, and many grew to be very, very fond of them. One korean woman told my mother' i never thought i could look at a dog and see my friends son' to show she had understood the value our animals held for us.....what a gidt they gained from being here, i wonder what simialr gift one could gain from being over there

peachyprice

Moominmamma wrote: »

Are your parents still in Oz? Or did they come back?

No, they came back. My mum was far too home sick, they lasted 4 years and came back just after their house had been built

She was ok while the house build was going on because it was keeping her busy but as soon as that was done and she had nothing major to focus on she couldn't stand it any longer. I don't think Dad was too impressed, but he'd follow her to the end of the earth.

conradmum

Hi Moominmamma

I'd say go for it for sure. We moved to Taiwan nine months ago and generally we've had a brilliant time.

Pets - we would have had to leave a cat behind if she hadn't died shortly before we left. I'd found a friend who was willing to take her. When I spoke to the lady who ran our local cattery about leaving her behind she said not to worry that our cat would miss us. She said they're extremely adaptable and we'd miss her far more than she'd miss us.

International schools - as others have said, the standard of education is extremely high and if your husband's company is paying you're getting private education for free. And your children will probably make friends with children from all over the world as well as native Koreans (lots of local people also send their children to international schools if they're dual nationals, because of the benefits of English language instruction).

We actually enrolled our son in a local school because we felt the opportunity for him to learn to speak Mandarin was too good to miss.

Family and friends - I've kept in touch with all of my friends very well, but you do have to make the effort. When I moved back to the UK from abroad many years ago I didn't make the effort and lost contact with lots of people. Something I really regret now.

As others have said, Skype is great for keeping in contact with your family , and you tend to find you have more meaningful conversations.

Lifestyle - living in Asia is generally great. Seoul is a developed city and you'll probably find some things such as public transportation even better than back home. I don't know a lot about Korea but eating out and entry prices are usually much cheaper than the UK. The rule of thumb is that you can live cheaper in Asia than Europe unless you want to eat European food all the time. (Korean food is delicious but very spicy!)

Culture - one caveat I have heard is that Koreans can be a little xenophobic and you might not experience the high status that white foreigners generally have in the rest of Asia. However, I doubt you will meet this face to face. Also, certainly in Seoul I doubt you will get stared at very much, which can be a problem in the rest of Asia.

I'd like to write more but I have to put my son to bed. My blog's in my profile if you'd like to read more about our day to day experiences. But in short, I'd say take the opportunity.

Moominmamma

Kalama, just a word of warning before you come home; Saturday night telly is dire, I'd give it a miss and concentrate on scoffing chocolate and sprogging if I were you :rotfl:

I'm really pleased to hear that people have come to accept your dogs, not quite convinced anyone other than me is going to view mine as a "gift" but who knows? I feel slightly bad that I'm worrying more about the dog settling in than the kids!

peachyprice I'm glad you got your mum back dh keeps assuring me we can always come home too if it all goes horribly wrong.

Thanks for your reply conradmum, lots of food for thought - I will definitely have a look at your blog later. Can I just ask how old your son is and how he's finding attending a local school? Have you been learning Mandarin too? We're all going to be attending Korean lessons if we go! Oh, scrap that bit, just seen it's on your blog!

angelil

Hi there

I moved to France in 2008. I had several reasons for doing so:
1) I couldn't get work in the UK but was offered work in France
2) My now-husband already lived there and we wanted to put an end to the silly long-distance thing we had going on
3) Of the two countries (he's French, I'm English) we felt France offered better opportunities for any children we might choose to have.

The fact of 2) made the move quite easy on a practical level; he was already installed so it was just a matter of getting a second key cut.

Pros of being here: the buzz of living so near Paris, the chance to improve my language skills (I'm practically fluent now), the chance to experience a different culture along with all its history and psychology, the fact that it's different and yet still close enough to home to visit, the experience of an international lifestyle (I work in an international school and live in a quite international community as well), the "foodie" aspect of France (to say that all French people eat brilliantly and take two-hour lunches would be totally untrue but there is still a huge appreciation for food and wine), the chance to explore new landscapes and localities

Cons: the international lifestyle experience (it has plenty of downsides, trust me - not least that I would rather be working in a Francophone rather than Anglophone environment), the smoking (it is a HUGE problem here. Where the UK has binge drinking, France has smoking - I'd say every 2nd or 3rd person smokes and it is DISGUSTING), the rental prices (buying is strictly for millionaires only!)

Don't worry about telling your mum. I know I haven't moved as far from mine as you have but mine is amazingly paranoid and yet took it superbly (even behind closed doors as I understand it from my dad!). And even if she doesn't take it well...it's your life ultimately. And you can always come back if you hate it

evi3000

We moved to the Middle East just under 2 years ago. Our house back in the UK is rented out and thanks to living rent free, tax free, utilities free and with ridiculously cheap petrol and cars, our mortgage should be paid next year.
As said international schools are excellent and have much smallerclass sizes than starte schools back in the UK.
My mother was upset when I told her we were moving abroad but it's only a 6 hour flight and sh'e sbeen to visit. I explained to her that my priority was my children and their financial future. We skype regulalry and time has flown.
Go for it. We've been here almost 2 years and time has flown. I plan on staying another year or 2 and then I'll be back in the UK mortgage free with substantial savings behind us to buy our forever house and put the kids through private school.