Do you think sex is important in a relationship?

Gingham_R

Humphrey10 wrote: »

I don't think that's what Gingham R meant, I think what was meant that they literally were not real, they were fiction, due to the photoshopping the picture does not show what they look like in real life.


I know but presumably they are aiming at mass market, what is most attractive to most people. So presumably more people like to look at T&A than like to look at sticking out bony bits. So why advertise stuff with boney women? Seriously I've never understood it.

I think the first problem is in the notions of what 'people' like to look at, in that we all, without being bombarded with things telling us what we 'should' like to look at, will be attracted to different properties.

And the second problem is in the constant concern about what sort of women people want to look at and why this is so - we do not have naked and semi naked men so frequently displayed.

BugglyB

I think the skinny skinny look is a 'fashion' ideal rather than a sex thing.

I'm interested (genuinely, im not having a pop!) at people who don't allow their partners to watch !!!!!!. How do you feel ok saying that? I'd be livid if my oh told me what I was or wasn't allowed to watch online or on tv or read. And how do you monitor it? Or do you just take their word?

benb76

Back to the original question....

I love sex and so does my OH and it's a daily (or more) event. Without it we'd just be friends instead of in a relationship.

MummyOfTwo

BugglyB wrote: »

I think the skinny skinny look is a 'fashion' ideal rather than a sex thing.

I'm interested (genuinely, im not having a pop!) at people who don't allow their partners to watch !!!!!!. How do you feel ok saying that? I'd be livid if my oh told me what I was or wasn't allowed to watch online or on tv or read. And how do you monitor it? Or do you just take their word?

i think the problems tend more to arise when its hidden from partners. i draw that conclusion from the virtually daily threads we see here about women feeling very hurt by the discovery that their loved one views !!!!!!. Women in !!!!!! look a very certain way, and self confidence is very easily dented. I think couples should get a '!!!!!! policy' out there - if your partner is absolutely against it (for whatever reason) then that should be respected. if you couldnt give it up for a real-life partner then im guessing theres a bigger problem going on! Personally i dont have issue with it as long as nobody is hiding it - when it becomes a sneaky thing, suspicions become aroused. add to this the fact that !!!!!! isnt quite the straightforward magazines and videos world that it used to be - online its very much an interactive process if you wish it to be, and i do feel that then you are straying into infidelity.

C_Mababejive

Yes sex is important in a relationship but it has to be consensual and mutually agreeable/beneficial. All other issues must be left outside the bedroom door. Sex should not be used as a weapon to make petty scores relating to other issues.

It may be that one or both parties would have sex with another partner. This may or may not work depending on individual circumstances.

!!!!!!..again its an individual thing. It can be mutually beneficial or it can be poison and signal the death knell in a relationship.

determined_new_ms

ha ha ha! There seems to be a plethora of threads/arguments about !!!!!! at the moment derailing the original question! I like Gingham R's take on it, but she (I think?) echoes my own opinions so that's self explanatory. Some like it, some don't. But then someone who was into dogging wouldn't be with someone who only liked to have sex on a sunday evening in the missionary position! Both appetites are ok as long as the people are consenting and not harming anyone else IMHO

It has seemed to me that those who are avid supporters of !!!!!! make the assumption that "all men" like it (I do know some men who don't like pron, as well as knowing women who do), have a right god given right to watch it and ignore the very real issues about why a lot of women go into that industry. You will never know if the woman groaning ferociously while every orifice is being filled is actually enjoying it, some will, some won't, some are forced, some aren't but all are "acting" and if they are doing their job well they will be seen to be enjoying it. I have actually watched some videos where it is clear that the woman is in pain and isn't having such a good time. But as long as the person watching it is getting their rocks off, what does it matter eh? The availability of !!!!!! is distorting young people's view of sex, there is no arguing that. I have recently met someone whose job involves doing work with young girls/women to look at the issues around sex, and developing their own opinions about what is and isn't ok. We were discussing this and she said nearly always anal comes and the issues get explored. It would seem that youngs boys now think this is normal, girls are being pressurised into it and are questioning themselves if its ok to say no when it actually hurts and doesn't bring much enjoyment to them...

But anyway back to the original question. Yes I think sex is very important in a relationship, bringing intimacy and connection to the couple. Luckily both my partner and I are young, fit and healthy and make the most of that, there may come a time in our lives when we aren't (depression,heath, stress, bereavement) and will need to look elsewhere for that intimacy, so think we should make the most of it now while we can.

Mismatched libidos can be a problem but like elsewhere in life its about compromise. So 1 person has a lower drive than the other? Then its important that a middle ground is found where both people are happy.

However I am sure there are many couples in the world who neither have very high sex drives and are happy having sex rarely if ever and it doesn't cause a probem

C_Mababejive

Further to my post #46 and digressing slightly,if one or both partners have a desire for sex with different partners is that ok as long as everyone agrees? It might be due to different needs/sex drives /disability whatever.

Why should sex be restricted to one partner within a relationship?

determined_new_ms

C_Mababejive wrote: »

Further to my post #46 and digressing slightly,if one or both partners have a desire for sex with different partners is that ok as long as everyone agrees? It might be due to different needs/sex drives /disability whatever.

Why should sex be restricted to one partner within a relationship?

I think its for the couple themselves to decide that. Me personally I wouldn't and couldn't live with that

Penny-Pincher!!

Yes, I think sex is an important part in a relationship, BUT it isn't the most important.

jamespir

Better_Off_1983 wrote: »

I really do.

It may seem controversial but I find people who say that it is not important maybe they have just grown accustomed to the fact that their partner is not as highly sexed as they are.

What sort of things in everyday life do you find affects a person's libido or love life? I think lack of money, employment, children, health worries, anxiety and stress.

Do you think !!!!!! has a serious effect on relationships? I find they do if you pay more attention to that, than you do your partner.

Feel free to respond and post your own questions for other to follow up and answer.

sex is not important its nice to have though but when your in a long term relationship you never seem to get it as often as when you first start out it loses its magic so to speak

i would say !!!!!! has a good effect one of the sort of options given by sex councilers is to sit down and watch a !!!!!! film with your loved one as it supposed to help get you in the mood


you need to spice things up a bit as well that can help