Who Gets The Ring?

Gavin83

I honestly don't see an engagement ring as a gift. It's given as a notification of marriage, you wouldn't give someone an engagement ring if you didn't want to marry them. Therefore if the marriage doesn't happen I feel they should return it.

If you present someone with an engagement ring, ask them to marry you and they say no what happens to the ring then? It's a ring with conditions attached to it, it's not the same as a regular present.

londonsurrey

Gavin83 wrote: »

I honestly don't see an engagement ring as a gift. It's given as a notification of marriage, you wouldn't give someone an engagement ring if you didn't want to marry them. Therefore if the marriage doesn't happen I feel they should return it.

If you present someone with an engagement ring, ask them to marry you and they say no what happens to the ring then? It's a ring with conditions attached to it, it's not the same as a regular present.

So does this mean that following those rules, the ring then belongs to the woman when she does marry him or does it remain his?

How about this case, where there's been a child subsequent to the presentation of the ring? Is it still his ring, and remains his until he gets around to marrying her?

Come to think of it, if it's just a notification, it means that a engagement ring is just a fancy dog collar on a woman, and it means the woman is reserved for him. As it remains his, and she's now committed to him without a guarantee of the marriage and the ring becoming his, she really shouldn't thank him for the ring, either in words or a physical manner.

It's actually a bit silly for a woman to proudly show off a "tag" on her that doesn't belong to her. Why doesn't a man show his commitment to marry her by putting a tag on himself, not her?

nimbo

years ago when my aunt was getting divorced - she and her now ex ended up in front of a judge (they had a massive stud farm, and it wasn't a friendly divirce) he tried to argue that each and every piece of jewellery he had bought her was an 'investment' - and the judge actually refused to let him have them in the settlement as they were all bought just before anniversaries, birthdays or christmas.

the ring is morally and leagally yours to keep - do somehting nice with the moeny from it either save it for you child - or go to Chessington (or similar) with them...... you really won't get much for it second hand...

Kitten_Pie

Social Etiquette dictates:

If he calls off the wedding she keeps the ring.

If she calls off the wedding he keeps the ring.

Person_one

Gavin83 wrote: »

I honestly don't see an engagement ring as a gift.

But that's what it is.

Just because its traditionally given along with a proposal doesn't mean anything. Its not compulsory, it has no legal standing.

I only give people wedding presents because they're getting married, if they divorce should they give them all back?

Mara69

Person_one wrote: »

Is the OP a petty, immoral, tacky gold digger if she doesn't return every other gift he gave her during their relationship?

To my mind, it is more the fact that they are bickering over it. God, if it were me, I'd be glad to be shot of it and him. She is making herself look cheap by arguing over it. All this crap about putting the money aside for the child is a smokescreen.

Mrs_Imp

I gave mine to a charity shop. They peered at it and said 'it's worth more melted down I'm afraid' I said 'Good, best place for it. Please put the money towards a good cause'

I'm another for selling it and putting the money in your sons's bank account. The ring is just a reminder of what might have been but will never be. Not a good reminder.

System

If i broke off the engagement i would be duty bound to give the ring back to him.

If he broke off our engagement then he could whistle for it.:D

fluffnutter

A lady offers to return the ring. A gentleman always refuses.

ETanny

If he wants it to go towards your kid.... I'd beat him to the punch and sell it then give him half and tell him the other half has been put away for your son.