a fathers responcibilty to his kids

coolcait

duchy wrote: »

If perhaps you had bothered reading my previous post you'd have seen I drew very clear paralles between my own personal experience and the Mother. So the answer to your question is yes -Personally though I don't believe you need to have an identical experience to be able to empathise with a particular experience--Most people can imagine what it's like to be debilitated by a stroke and your marriage breaking up soon after-it doesn't take much effort.

But, the relationship (not marriage) broke up before the Mother had a stroke.

duchy

Oh dear Dasa's at the wine again -reading skills severely diminished again

I would never be in the position the OP is in as I would never ask or encourage a man to move six hours away from his children.. My post was a response to the mother's anger to the OP's boyfriend -maybe you should read again and perhaps you'll get it .

jamespir

op ignore the hate from the posters who are bitter and obviously have a grudge against fathers

i hope you can sort the situation out who it has to be best for is the child though at 5 years old its a big thing to be moved half way around the country and isnt really pratical

Dasa

duchy wrote: »

Oh dear Dasa's at the wine again -reading skills severely diminished again

I would never be in the position the OP is in as I would never ask or encourage a man to move six hours away from his children.. My post was a response to the mother's anger to the OP's boyfriend -maybe you should read again and perhaps you'll get it .

You are the one that needs to read again my dear. You made a comment about people telling people what they should do having not walked in their shoes, and you are doing exactly the same thing to the OP. That's why that poster put that question to you. Obviously it was to subtle for you to understand.

duchy

coolcait wrote: »

But, the relationship (not marriage) broke up before the Mother had a stroke.

A child of 16 and a child of 5 -a long term union regardless-and the way I read it the father moved to Scotland AFTER his ex had her stroke-leaving your partner doesn't absolve a decent parent of continuing been a father rather than moving six hours away when his children would be struggling with their Mother's illness.

coolcait

duchy wrote: »

Oh dear Dasa's at the wine again -reading skills severely diminished again
.

Slightly ironic, given that you have got the details wrong on more than one occasion in this thread.

Dasa

coolcait wrote: »

But, the relationship (not marriage) broke up before the Mother had a stroke.

Coolcait that does not fit in with the portrayal of the "evil father and other women" scenario, so let's not get any real facts in the way.

Dasa

Actually I don't drink wine I just know bitterness when I see it.

coolcait

duchy wrote: »

A child of 16 and a child of 5 -a long term union regardless-and the way I read it the father moved to Scotland AFTER his ex had her stroke-leaving your partner doesn't absolve a decent parent of continuing been a father rather than moving six hours away when his children would be struggling with their Mother's illness.

I set out a timeline - based on the OP's posts - some time ago on this thread.

The relationship had broken down before the ex had a stroke. We don't know if it had been a long relationship of uninterrupted bliss, or if it had been a rocky relationship.

The ex has not attempted to work with the father in arranging contact. Transport logistics can only be sorted out once you actually know that the Mother will allow contact, and when.

If a Mother causes problems in arranging contact between child and father, then distances start to become irrelevant. The child would still have difficulty getting access to his father, even if the father lived next door.

You assume that the children were "struggling" with their mother's illness. One was probably too young to notice. The elder child doesn't appear to be estranged from her father (although she is now estranged from her mother and grandparents).

coolcait

Dasa wrote: »

Coolcait that does not fit in with the portrayal of the "evil father and other women" scenario, so let's not get any real facts in the way.

I'm well aware that's where I have been going against the majority on this entire thread!