New Dmp Mutal Support Thread

fay66

my first posting here, I feel so !!!!!! with it all , been burying my head for 3 months begging money to pay paul, Now rang Payplan, got turned down by CCCS, she seemed really nice and said do the offer of a £1, so will be writing this weekend.

teecee152

Lonely I didn't return my credit cards, just cut them up and put them in a drawer!:eek:

my bank The CO - Op asked me to return my cheque book and debit card as they are going to close my current account as i no longer stisfied their t&c's since im on a dmp (i have a personal loan with them).

just cut up the cards and if they request themsend them back in pieces!

teecee

teecee152

Welcome fay you are in the right place.

Well done for facing your debts thats a first huge step.
sending huge ((((((hugs)))))) because you sound like you need it.
Remember you're not alone and we're all here to help!!!!

HANG IN THERE!!!!!!!!

teecee xx

lonely_2

Thanks everyone - it is hard to keep everything in perspective. I have even started getting spots, which I haven't had since my teens!!

Daisyblue, I have thought long and hard about whether I should tell my husband (and listened to everyone's advice on this forum - most of them are saying I should) BUT I have gradually come to realise that what I'm most scared about is not that he will leave me, it is that he will feel the need to shoulder this burden too. And it's not fair because it is all my debt - yeah some of the money has gone on gifts for him, holidays together, etc. - but if he had been aware of the situation he would never have let me spend the money. Secondly, and this is a much more cowardly reason, I can't stand the thought of our relationship changing. At the mo, he respects me completely and we have an equal, balance relationship. After he finds this out, he will never look at me in the same way - after all, I am the first to admit I have been completely irresponsible. There's no way a sane and rational person can justify "comfort spending" and living beyond their means - I have no excuse for what I've done other than I'm an idiot.

teecee152

LONELY Try not to be so hard on yourself.

I know exactly how you feel!!

The only people who know about my debt are the lovely people here.
I am a single mum and people know that I'm struggling but they have no idea that it's debt that is my problem. I don't think I could bear he look of disappointment on my parents' faces if they knew and it would be such a burden for them.
I was always raised that if you couldn't afford to pay cash for it you didn't have it!
If it was something you really wanted then you would just have to save up!!
If only I had listened instead of stupidly getting credit thinking i could pay it back, when in reality it was obvious that one day i wouldn't be able to.
There are many reasons why a person gets into this situation and I feel that only the people on this site truly understand what it feels like.

Whether you tell your oh or not is your call and there is no judgement made on this site, support is offered freely with no question.
You must do what you think is best for you and yours!!!

Just remember you always have someone to talk to!:grouphug:

teecee xx

in_debt_again_but_dealing_with_it

Hi all
Haven't been on since Wednesday and so much to catch up on, my you've all been busy! Not so me, college all day yesterday and no news from HSBC though I think they did phone again today, (first time for over a week!) I just don't answer their call!! Think they probably pushing for managed loan - lets not go there!!
Hi Lonely and all the other new club members, Lonely I haven't told my oh either for many reasons but also for the respect one plus with the children I don't want to subject them to any stress!! Also think oh is suspicious but prefers not to know if you know what I mean particularly as its always been me that deals with the money - his choice!!! Rightly or wrongly I prefer to "go it alone" then the problem is "mine alone"! Each to their own I guess.
Anyway got to take mummy dearest shopping will pop on again later. Love to you all.
xxx

Ex-Spendaholic

Evening all

After such a good day yesterday I'm having one of those panic and feel sick days again. I'm really panicing about Hellifax. :eek: I really hope that they don't close our bank accounts. :eek: I have started a separate thread to see what others think.

Lonely and IDAAS my situation is the same with regard to the OH.

Ex-Spendaholic

OMG :j :j :j :j Having felt really down and in a panic I decided to face the scariest of them all - Hellifax. :eek: I just phoned them and they confirmed they have accepted the DMP and have frozen interest and charges. :j :j Maybe they will even stop phoning me. :rotfl:

I am delighted as this was the one that I have worried about most. If they would just not do anything awful like close my current accounts :eek: I would be one happy person.

So there you go 7 down 2 to go now :j

Accepted:

Cahoot
Halifax
Egg
Next
Argos
GE Money
Studio

Awaiting:

Barclaycard (seems it will be at least a week before they decide :eek: )
GE B+Q (confident about them as the other GE accepted :j )

I swear once I get these 2 on board and if Hellifax leave me alone with the bank accounts I really am going to be a model citizen and try to save and make as much money as possible for debt. :A

teecee152

EX - Thats fantastic news I'm so pleased for you,:j :j

Nearly there now how great is that!!!!

keep up the good work.

teecee xx:T

Ex-Spendaholic

Thanks Teecee. :beer:

Just read my stars: "Your financial picture is excellent" :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: