Telling off adult children.

jellyhead

Ames wrote: »

Euronorris - yes, it was Ryanair.

Nicki, there isn't anyone else I can turn to really. There's my younger sister but our relationship is pretty strained. As far as my mental illness goes, she either says I need to get over it, or blames anything she doesn't agree with on it, whichever suits her at the time. I don't have any other family, or friends.

Do you have facebook friends? loads of us from MSE are on there. I'll be your friend

jellyhead

My mum does butt in if she thinks I am being too strict with my eldest (he's her favourite and can do no wrong!) but in general, no my parents don't tell me off.

My dad tried to tell me I should get married when I was pregnant, but I told him that marriage for the sake of pregnancy didn't work out for him and my mum.

Ames

Sorry for only just replying, I finally got away on holiday on Wednesday and so I'm only checking in now and then.

TheConways wrote: »

I'm an only child, and I often have my mum (not in a nasty way) saying "Ooh, I wouldn't do that, ooh, why do you want to do that" about this, that and the other. I think my parents have this huge desire to protect me because I'm an only child. I point out that I'm 29, married, and live on a different continent!

Whilst some parents seem to have problems about "letting go", often it is meant in a well-meaning manner. After all, you're their offspring, and it's natural that they don't want you to make mistakes.

On the flip side, I frequently tell my mum off for doing things... Smoking, driving after two beers, not getting her dodgy knee seen to by a doc, etc etc.

For the OP - do you mind me asking what your illness is surrounding buses? I have a friend who loves buses, but can't stand planes!

I have panic attacks about usig buses. I think it's because of having to worry about looking out for a stop, then having the whole bus stop just because I want to get off, and they're usually busy so I sometimes struggle to get a seat, which is a pain because of my mobility probems. Then there's having to stand up and move to the front while it's slowing down, when I'm unsteady on my feet at the best of times. Whereas a train and especially a plane it's just a case of get on, and get off when it stops. I was having 'travel training' to help me with it, but then mum got cancer and I didn't have time for it any more.

pollypenny wrote: »

OP, your dad is probably worried about you.

Diabetes, no job , let alone bipolar. You also have a lot to handle at uni, eh?

He doesn't worry about my diabetes because he has it and as far as he's concerned my test results are so low that I don't have it. Bipolar doesn't exist as far as he's concerned. Problems at uni are all my fault, since they can't be down to an illness that doesn't exist. Plus I'm 'only' part time so nothing to handle there.

jellyhead wrote: »

Do you have facebook friends? loads of us from MSE are on there. I'll be your friend

I do, most of whom are MSErs! If you want to be my friend pm me your name and I'll add you, but as I'm currently touring Eastern Europe it might take me a few days.

londonsurrey

Ames wrote: »

He doesn't worry about my diabetes because he has it and as far as he's concerned my test results are so low that I don't have it. Bipolar doesn't exist as far as he's concerned.

It sounds like to him, the long and short of it is that you have no problems. Possible reasons that occur to me:

- he subscribes to the suffer in silence school of stoicism

- he feels incapable of helping, but is equally incapable of accepting that shortcoming in himself, so hmmm, who's the person closest at hand to blame? The person who is bringing it to his attention that there's a possible problem?

- you're the whipping boy of the family, i.e. to blame for everything. But I haven't really heard anything to really back this particular possibility up, it's just something to watch out for when trying to determine what's happening in certain family dynamics.