When is a teenager old enough to go on the train alone?

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Taadaa wrote: »

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On a seperate note, reading people's experiences of what they were allowed to do when they were kids - with respect, we live in a different world now and we aren't going back to those halcyon days any time soon.

But we may have to and accept the consequences. How we deal with the fact that the stupid will not live to reproduce is beyond most people though many can see for themselves that raising a generation of useless lard buckets who are virtually too stupid to be let out alone is not going to help society at large.

As a young teenager I could traverse the local railways and manage to get home in one piece and we had no mobile phones to call for help. I also didn't wear a nappy after about the age of two and wasn't one of the ones who fell out of trees either, though I climbed many.

I wasn't wrapped up in cotton wool and hard as it is I try to give my child freedom. With that comes responsibility, not only from the child but from the parent, not to raise another useless lump of a child but to raise one who can actually stand on their own two feet.

duchy

Must admit if my son with Aspergers syndrome at 16 could manage a train journey with changes across London to visit his Dad -at weekends so sometimes having parts of the service unexpectedly changed to bus services then I'm a bit baffled too. Mobile phones are admittedly a godsend for parents when kids are travelling but I left school at sixteen )pre mobile days)and commuted into central London for work (and often socialized up there too). I can only once remember anything going wrong which was when I got on a train that went non stop to Brighton instead of stopping -I simply got off at Brighton and travelled back up again -no huge drama.

barbarawright

Taadaa wrote: »

I think as he has experience of using public transport on his own, I think this would be fine. My son will be 14 in the summer, and towards the end of the year I am considering allowing him to make a 45 minute journey, being put on and met at the other end as you describe.

On a seperate note, reading people's experiences of what they were allowed to do when they were kids - with respect, we live in a different world now and we aren't going back to those halcyon days any time soon.

In what way is inter-city train travel more dangerous than it was 30 years ago?

duchy

It isn't -but people's perceptions of "keeping kids safe" have changed.

My parents were considered overly protective by most people (they were older parents) and I often wasn't allowed to do stuff my friends were -growing up but it baffles me when I meet people who consider "Going to London" as a "brave" thing to do. Often in their 20s and thirties. (We live in the South East commuting distance of London)

daisiegg

duchy wrote: »

It isn't -but people's perceptions of "keeping kids safe" have changed.

My parents were considered overly protective by most people (they were older parents) and I often wasn't allowed to do stuff my friends were -growing up but it baffles me when I meet people who consider "Going to London" as a "brave" thing to do. Often in their 20s and thirties. (We live in the South East commuting distance of London)

My mum is 47 and despite having lived a 38 minute train journey to central London her whole life, DEFINITELY still considers going to London a 'brave' thing to do and if she is going to the theatre or something (very infrequent) it takes military planning and a lot of nerves.

Equally my grandmother is nearly 80 and similarly, has lived in the same town within 38 mins of London her whole life and has I think been to London once to go to the ballet. She still worries when I go to London on the train, even though I am an adult and have done it hundreds of times... Even better, my grandparents regularly drive my sister to and from university in Cambridge (a 40 min train journey - wow I've really given away our location haven't I!) to avoid her having to go on the train.

duchy

Yeah you have a bit

The funny thing is your Mum is probably on the train with people who do the journey daily for work.

londonsurrey

I was put on planes on my own to go halfway across the globe from age 11. Admittedly, I was signed for, like a parcel

Children should always be given the skills and knowledge of what to do when things go wrong. I wasn't given that when I was a child, and learnt the hard way. The first time I took out a niece and nephew for the day, we began with a civilised breakfast. There I was, sitting with the precious firstborns of two families.

Over the course of the meal, I went over various scenarios, if we were separated, what they'd do, where to get help, where NOT to get help, how to get home on their own, etc. Then we had a fun day in London

VikkiiKawaii

I wouldn't see a problem with a fifteen year old taking the train. I'm seventeen and I've been doing it for the last two years. The worst that could happen is exactly what happened to me once - I got slightly lost and had to call my Dad to come and get me.

Sambucus_Nigra

You know it's ok. She knows it's ok. Your OH knows it's ok and the mum knows it's ok.

But what are you going to do about it? If he's moaning about being tired then he either needs to put his foot down with the ex, change his job or suck it up. Not much you can do if he is making these choices himself is there?

mico62

It depends on the child but it doesn't do them any favours to chauffeur and escort them everywhere as I found out.

DS had a taster day at 6th form, its 5 miles away so they run a bus service. He got to the bus stop on time and met 3 others but none of them knew they had to stick their hand out for the bus to stop :rotfl: and had to phone-a-mum for a lift. None of them had ever been on a bus.

But DD, a young looking 16, has regularly travelled up and down the country to conventions for the last 18 months. If she's not meeting someone on the train and has to change trains she'll text when she arrives at the first station and phones when she's on the connecting train and when she arrives.

She regularly travels to Newcastle and Birmingham and she's got the National Rail app on her phone in case there's a problem - I didn't know such a thing existed til she showed me.

Both have been brought up the same but have completely different personalities and coping skills. DS might be 'smarter' but he's certainly not streetwise.