MSE Pregnancy Club 24

Icey77

ginvzt wrote: »

If it is a redundancy, I am not sure how can they ask for this money back... Maybe worth giving a call to CAB or ACAS or similar? I think if you are leaving on your own will or being 'let go' for a reason, then yes, but if it is a redundancy, I am not sure they have the right to do this (at least morally...)

I'm with Gin on this one, if they are making you redundant that's their decision not yours!

I second the call to ACAS - they were really helpful to me when I had a query over holidays and maternity leave . Also, get your facts ready if you do face a fight the company could appear to be treating to be treating you differently because you're pregnant ... never a good move and an HR person worth their salt wouldn't dare to go down this route!

Perhaps the company is rying to claw back every penny and see you as an easy mark? Good luck!

camNolliesMUMMY

Just a quick question does anyone have pressure down bellow like an aching feeling and when you stand up it feels worse or turn over in bed? what is it?

lovecrafting

morning everyone, i havent read back yet so will do so in a few mins.

GTT went well, altho i was starving at the end of it and nearly passed out, i thought i was going to be sick when she gave me the polycal drink but she said if i am sick she would have to abandon the test and re do it after another nights fasting so i tried really hard not to be. I get the results in the post in a few days.

the baby is looking good she weighs 2lb10 (ish) at the moment and is completley normal weight wise so thats good news. they gave me some medicine for the heartburn, have refered me to physio and some medication for the spd wich they finally agree that it is. i wasnt going to take the painkillers they gave me but last night was so sore after being at the hospital for most of the day then dog trining that i ended up taking 2, best night sleep ever. it was amazing.

lisa26_2

I'm taking voluntary redundancy so in effect I'm choosing to leave.

4nnabella wrote: »

That's rubbish Lisa... Although if you know of others who were not asked to pay money back when they left, could you not use that as an argument?

I might do but it's a really good friend of mine and I'm worried that if I say I know people who haven't had to pay it back, I'll have to give her name as proof and then they might chase her for the money too. I'm pretty sure she's not the only one though, I'm sure other people have mentioned people they know who haven't had to pay it back.

ginvzt

lisa26 wrote: »

I'm taking voluntary redundancy so in effect I'm choosing to leave.

I don't think it should matter in this case. Give a call to ACAS and ask their advice. You might come out with £1300 better off! It is a lot of money, don't let them treat you differently to others.

MrsManda

Good luck to everyone who's being induced/going through labour/got hospital appointments today and for the rest of the week.

Not sure I'll be on here after this afternoon for the rest of the week as my mum and sister are coming to visit and my mum just sprung it on me that my aunt, nan and 2 of my cousins are coming down tomorrow though they're likely to just come for the day.

Personally I think doing a 250mile round trip in a day is madness especially as my aunt has no sense of time so probably won't set off until 11am, stop off on the way for lunch and want to leave here before it gets dark. But it's their choice and we don't have the space to put them all up here anyway.

Does anyone else have family who are incapable of turning up when they say they will? My inlaws are great and will turn up within 5 minutes of when they've said they would. Admittedly I don't expect that from my lot because they live so far away but they could at least set off when they said they will rather than dithering so much.
I've told my mum that I'm not willing to wait around all day for everyone to turn up - they have to let me know when they are physically on the motorway (just saying they're in the car is not good enough - I've learnt my lesson after years of experience ).
Once they are on the road I have ~3.5 hours until they arrive (- doing a journey that takes my OH and various friends less than 2.5hours) which is plenty of time for me to get home from pretty much anywhere I'm likely to go .

It'll be good to see them though if they ever turn up

I'm really teary today hoping I can stop crying before people arrive as I don't particularly fancy being interrogated.

Good luck to everyone today, hope some of you will be having mummy cuddles before the day is out

kelda_shelton

ginvzt wrote: »

I don't think it should matter in this case. Give a call to ACAS and ask their advice. You might come out with £1300 better off! It is a lot of money, don't let them treat you differently to others.

I agree, it shouldn;t make a difference whether voluntary or not. Especially if there was no mention of this when voluntary redundancy was first offered to you.

lisa26_2

I'd just be grateful if people would let me know that they are going to turn up!! I hate un-planned visitors! MIL just turns up without calling ahead and then says she's just popping in for 5 minutes....then stays 2 hours! or if DH arranges for them to come at a certain time they are nearly always late but turn up early if they're picking us up to go somewhere, last time we'd only just started getting ready when they arrived to pick us up! I've told DH he has to tell them that once baby is here they must call and check its ok before they come round. the last thing I want is people turning up on the doorstep just as I have got baby to sleep and am intending having a rest myself!

ginvzt

Lisa, have you thought of posting this on the Redundancy board? (I am sure there is one on MSE), you might get some very useful help. Sorry, I just feel angry with your company! I hope you don't have to pay back.

ginvzt

lisa26 wrote: »

I'd just be grateful if people would let me know that they are going to turn up!! I hate un-planned visitors! MIL just turns up without calling ahead and then says she's just popping in for 5 minutes....then stays 2 hours! or if DH arranges for them to come at a certain time they are nearly always late but turn up early if they're picking us up to go somewhere, last time we'd only just started getting ready when they arrived to pick us up! I've told DH he has to tell them that once baby is here they must call and check its ok before they come round. the last thing I want is people turning up on the doorstep just as I have got baby to sleep and am intending having a rest myself!

We don't have a problem of people turning up unannounced, as our families are abroad and friends live a way away, but once families are here, they are here for a while, and I just get fed up! I think we got used to living on our own and doing things our own way.

I am actually dreading for all the suggestions coming from different directions. Our families are from different countries, so have very different ideas on bringing up children. I was telling OH that I am going to get a notebook and use it as 'Book of suggestions' - if you want to advise/suggest/tell me how to do anything, write it down! (So I can ignore it and don't have to listen to the lecture!)

My MIL can be especially bad with that, she just doesn't know when to stop. On our last morning in Italy I made a mistake of telling OH that my legs is a bit crampy when he asked what is wrong with my leg as I was rubbing it at breakfast table. He straight away shared this with his mother, who proceeded to tell me that I need to take extra calcium and magnesium, when to medicine cupboard, got out the tablets, leaflets, etc and started explaining OH what is needed. I said I am not going to take anything until I talk to my doctor. She continued to explain that the cramps are because of calcium and magnesium imbalance. I left the kitchen and went to our room and closed the doors quite annoyed. I could hear her still explaining OH things. Half an hour later, she was still going on. An hour later we set off to the airport, and I was not talking at all, I was so annoyed. And she was still telling OH what to do!!!! The last thing she said was to do leg massages, at which point, OH said enough (after I told him he is not going to be told anything anymore and he needs to set boundaries, which he is failing to do, he listens and then just ignores her according to him, but I can't keep listening her going on and on about the same thing for hours!!!!). So, I am trying to keep all my worries and pains away, apart from the things he already knows - hip pain, tiredness, heartburn.

Sorry, rant again...