Moving near the other woman...???

thatgirlsam

Yes I think I could do it

Why let her ruin the chances of you getting a house you would love to live in?

If your husband wanted to ever see her again he could do so wherever you lived

In fact, living nearer could make it much harder for anything to ever happen again?

If you want the house, go for it

When I moved into the house we are in now everyone said not to do it, because of the neighbours.. a well known 'problem family'

This was and is a decent sized 3 bedroom house, garage, perfect sized garden etc, thats no-one wanted beacuse of who lived next door

There was no way I was letting who lived next door scupper my chances!

Moved in and guess what... 4 months later they moved!

bylromarha

I am with you on the "sod her, i can go where i like, when i like, live where i like" in principle. In reality, could you keep saying this day after day?

Keep remembering you have done so well as a couple to move past the affair - it's a hard thing and many would rather give up than keep fighting for the relationship. Would seeing her house, therefore thinking "She's in there" help or hinder that process? are you really able to let sleeping dogs lie and not bring the affair up again should she be so frequently popping into your brain?

Have a very long chat with OH on it is my best advice to you. All the best.

HomeMum_2

Emmzi - i am honestly not addicted to drama!!! In fact im a quiet person who absolutely hates conflict. Maybe you are all right, and i shouldnt. It just seems really unfair that the house is in a lovely area, and in any other circumstances i would JUMP at the chance, i did nothing wrong, but i seem to be the one having to hide away I trust DH, but i guess maybe im being niave about everything. Ah well, i can dream....

cte1111

For your own piece of mind, I'd keep looking. The fact that you're saying you would have to walk a certain way around your prospective new road shows the impact it would have.

thatgirlsam

HomeMum wrote: »

Emmzi - i am honestly not addicted to drama!!! In fact im a quiet person who absolutely hates conflict. Maybe you are all right, and i shouldnt. It just seems really unfair that the house is in a lovely area, and in any other circumstances i would JUMP at the chance, i did nothing wrong, but i seem to be the one having to hide away I trust DH, but i guess maybe im being niave about everything. Ah well, i can dream....

Have you moved on and truly forgiven what has happened?

Or do you think about it quite a lot and does it still bother you?

It is unfair that you should miss out, and in fact it could be this that you end up resenting him for and not the affair!

Only you know if you could cope with it or not

HomeMum_2

But it IS a lovely house ..............................

meritaten

how on earth would anyone think you could contemplate living near this woman? so its a nice area and everyone thinks its lovely................and you would be in bits because you know there is a chance of YOU seeing her, your kids seeing her and worst of all .........your OH seeing her!
No no no - Say NO hun! you wouldnt have posted if you didnt have doubts and your instinct was saying 'Dont do this'!

whitewing

At least the neighbours already know your husband.

thatgirlsam

meritaten wrote: »

how on earth would anyone think you could contemplate living near this woman? so its a nice area and everyone thinks its lovely................and you would be in bits because you know there is a chance of YOU seeing her, your kids seeing her and worst of all .........your OH seeing her!
No no no - Say NO hun! you wouldnt have posted if you didnt have doubts and your instinct was saying 'Dont do this'!

Her OH could see her whenever he wanted, location has nothing to do with
it all depends on how the situation has been resolved and wether the OP has moved on from what happened

It has been a short time so maybe this is unrealistic at this stage

But why should she miss out when she has done nothing wrong?

GracieP

If a part of the motivation for the new year - new house plan is to move on from last year's affair then I can't imagine a worse way to move on than to move to the OW's vicinity. It would surely defeat the purpose on a stunningly grand scale?