Nice people thread part 5 - nicely does it

lostinrates

Oh lydia hurrah.

But, no pressure, Just going out for coffee is good. I hope it goes well, but that its going to coffee is enough to celebrate and be proud of. (it it goes further i shall hire a marhing band and march through the streets in celebration!)

Silvercar, i think it would depend for me on how you feel.

If you are totally confident and the op is small, your dh is fully in servile attnedant mode then......i would probably not tell my parents. Tbh, when the problems are huge i don't worry too much about MY parents because though we all love each other its a different realtionship.

PasturesNew

silvercar wrote: »

...

I'd tell them I had to go for a small op, just routine, nothing to worry about, but I can't change the date. But my parents both really had unspotted dementia so would have just said "OK" and forgotten it.

My parents weren't capable of looking after each other and had no interest in what other people were doing. They were kind of functional robots going through routines.

SingleSue

I'm going by what my parents would want here but it may help a little....my dad has become a worrier since his strokes and can get quite stressed out about sily little things. Now, although he would worry about me having to have an operation, he would be more annoyed and stressed that I didn't tell him or mum what was happening and that reaction would be worse as it would then become a trust isuue.

I stressed them out in December when I took myself off up to the big hospital on the advice of NHS direct, I didn't tell anyone apart from the children because I thought it would be a simple case of my going up there and them telling me not to be so silly and sending me home again in time for the two younger boys coming back from their paternal nan's house. As it was, they admitted me as an emergency and the doo doo hit the fan as all of a sudden, people had to be told and arrangements for the boys had to be made with no notice at all.

This stressed dad out enormously as they had not known about the build up, they hadn't even known I was unwell and it was the surprise element which made things worse. If I had said to them I had not been well, or that I had spoken to NHS direct, they may have been more prepared for the news.

Weather has been glorious here this morning, far too warm for doing housework, consequently, I am currently cooling down sitting on my bed in just my underwear! That I am able to do that is a miracle in itself, I have a rare day where there are no appointments and so far (she says touching wood very firmly), no phone calls from the school...about blooming time, been full on for weeks.

PasturesNew

Wheezy wrote: »

Look, we had an official poll on this a while ago and 93.4% of the NP's liked mushrooms. Topic closed.

I think it was engineered. I think the person who started it waited until mushroom-lovers were online.... then put a short "reply by" time on it and closed the poll quickly. If I recall, I missed the narrow time slot it was available for....

PasturesNew

It was survey day today.... I am pleased to report I had a really hot surveyor ... mmmm.

Would I? I would .... I'm probably old enough to be his mum though... oh - and he didn't offer

lostinrates

I don't even remember the poll. I would have said yes twice though. The big black ones are my favourite, or chanterelles, or the ones in chinese food, or the tiny ones i call wood mushrooms, no idea why, in mixed jars of mushrooms.

PasturesNew

I've only encountered mushrooms in three guises: [1] in a chicken and mushroom pie, where it's thin slimey slices.... and I can ignore those. [2] in a couple of chinese curries, where they are small and whole and I can pick them out. [3] in indian vegetable curries, but everything tastes the same in those so I can ignore them as they're chopped.

lostinrates

I think we will have mushrooms on toast for breakfast tomorrow, mmmmmmmmmmmm.

GDB2222

lostinrates wrote: »

I think we will have mushrooms on toast for breakfast tomorrow, mmmmmmmmmmmm.

My favourite breakfast is ruined tomatoes on toast.

(You ruin them by grilling them for far too long. It brings out all the flavour. Yummy!)

GDB2222

silvercar wrote: »

Problem 1 is they over react, so tingling fingers become a tumour rather than too much typing.

Problem 2 is they worry.

Problem 3 is that now is not a good time, One is in hospital and the other is at home, restricted visiting due to the treatment.

I did think of telling them that I didn't know the date of the op until now and now is not the right time to worry them.

Silver, there is clearly no easy answer. It is very good that you are thinking of them so carefully.