do you put a gift list in with evening invites?

ragga_2

Hi everyone myself and my fiancee are currently sending out invites, and after long discussions about whether or not it is cheeky or rude to put a poem asking for money in with them.(as we don't need anything in particular!) we now don't know whether it's right to put this in with the evening invites or not. What do you think? Thanks for input!!

74jax

ragga wrote: »

Hi everyone myself and my fiancee are currently sending out invites, and after long discussions about whether or not it is cheeky or rude to put a poem asking for money in with them.(as we don't need anything in particular!) we now don't know whether it's right to put this in with the evening invites or not. What do you think? Thanks for input!!

You will get LOADS of differing opinions on this subject :rotfl:

My opinion is: I wouldn't put a Gift List in with an Evening Invitation. I wouldn't put one in with Day Invitations either though. If someone asks for a Gift List then fine, but I certainly wouldn't send one with an invite.

MrsShawToBe

I did We aren't asking for home items etc, but have set up a honeymoon gift list, so people donate to our honeymoon and then we can exchange it for vouchers to go away with.

If people don't want to, they don't have to donate anything. No harm in just putting it in No one will think you are cheeky.

LEJC

We had a gift list...but didnt include any details with either invite...all our daytime guests asked about gifts and we then gave the gift list ....a few evening people asked...but mostly we just received cards and good wishes with a few presents or gift vouchers from our evening guests...
Personally I wasnt comfortable with asking for gifts from the evening people...we had over 200 guests at that reception...and in honesty it was about people sharing our day and having a good time rather than giving...

minerva_windsong

74jax wrote: »

You will get LOADS of differing opinions on this subject :rotfl:

My opinion is: I wouldn't put a Gift List in with an Evening Invitation. I wouldn't put one in with Day Invitations either though. If someone asks for a Gift List then fine, but I certainly wouldn't send one with an invite.

This is my view - I think if people want to get you something then the overwhelming majority will contact you and your OH (or your parents) to see if there's anything you'd like, and therefore wouldn't put the gift list in with any of the invites.

stamp76

Definitely don't put it in the evening invites - just enjoy the party and it will be a bonus if anyone of the evening shift gives you a gift. Saves a lot of bad feeling (not that there should be any, but people are tricky!)

NoAngel

Nope, not with the evening invitations. I wouldn't anyway and wouldn't expect to receive one if only attending the evening.

Torry_Quine

Definitely not, I don't think you should put one in with any invite. It's very cheeky and presumptous.

JOHN1982

I know this subject has been done to death a little bit, but just out of interest (because we'll be doing it), why are the people that are against a gift list in an invite so against it?

Every wedding I've been to has had something in the invite. The past three have all said something along the lines of "Look, we've been together ages, so if you want to give us something, make it cash. But if you don't want to, don't fret, have a great time!"

If, as has been said, everyone is going to ask about gifts, why not pre-empt it?


To the OP: Nope, I wouldn't do it for evening invites (and won't be)!

74jax

JOHN1982 wrote: »

I know this subject has been done to death a little bit, but just out of interest (because we'll be doing it), why are the people that are against a gift list in an invite so against it?

Every wedding I've been to has had something in the invite. The past three have all said something along the lines of "Look, we've been together ages, so if you want to give us something, make it cash. But if you don't want to, don't fret, have a great time!"

If, as has been said, everyone is going to ask about gifts, why not pre-empt it?


To the OP: Nope, I wouldn't do it for evening invites (and won't be)!

Like I said its personal choice. Some do, some don't.

For me you send an invitation to someone to attend what ever you are inviting them to.

I'm not inviting them to get a present, so why on earth would I send an invite with a gift list. If they had no inclination to come with a present, the fact I'd enclosed a gift list to me would make it look as though I wanted one.

I have never ever sent invitations with gift lists, whether it be a birthday party, welcoming party or whatever, it's just something I do not do. I totally appreciate other people have other views though.

As for why not pre-empt it, what if it wasn't going to be questioned by a guest? What if they just thought 'oh what a lovely thing to be invited too' if someone wants to buy a gift then 9 times out of 10 they will ask, and if they don't want to then I don't think being pre-empted to is the way to go.

Everyone is different though.

Hollie84

Ours will be going in with the invites,rather recieve something u will use and make the most of than to recieve something that will sit in its box or go to a charity shop as its unwanted