Transgender Help

PoorCharleyBear

on my CV I never mention that I am a mother to a preschooler - it is irrelevant to my ability to do a job. I assume if I did make a point of mentioning her, the employer would think I want special treatment/am going to be taking days off around childcare.

Leaving this off my CV is not lying- just containing relevant facts....your friend needs to ensure her CV just relates to skills and experiences. When references are requested she can clarify the male name aspect at that point.

catflea

Sorry if this is verging on necroposting, but I wanted to contribute. OP, if you wish to PM me at any point to discuss trans issues please feel free.

For the record I am M2F trans, and have literally just spoken to my colleagues today about my intent to transition in the workplace in April. As for the comment about why she disclosed at the evening class and suggesting discomfort, I personally would not see it that way - I'm very comfortable with who I am and I have made the deliberate descision to carry on that way. By being free to discuss these things I hope that I may be able to assist society becoming more open, accepting and realising that we are out there and we are still normal people!

I've seen two seperate reccomendations for the Beaumont Society - a group that I would never reccomend to anyone - they seem to be stuck staunchly in the 50s, believing that a womans role is in the home etc etc. It would be FAR better for OPs friend to find a local support group - a listing can be found on the (excellent) www.GIRES.org.uk website.

It is my feeling that your friend is wrong to disclose her gender status on her CV, again it gives an employer something to immediately pull her out of the "stack". Wrongly, many employers will see a TS person as a cause of concern as they may need more time off medical things etc than most other people.

I am very fortunate that within my organisation there is a VERY VERY strong diversity policy and I have been open from day 1 (well, maybe not day 1 - but certainly the first week) that I am trans but its not something that I put on my CV and not something that I was asked about at interview - so therefore no need to disclose.

The job market is TOUGH at the moment, so she needs to hang in there and get those applications in. Targeting an environment where she has relevant skills and qualifications rather than taking a scattergun approach - that rarely works I've found - unless you are looking at bottom rung jobs in organisations. For the record, if you do have to fill out a CRB check you do not HAVE to disclose any previous names if it puts you in a vulnerable position - there is a specific process to follow and specific person to contact but I dont have those details to hand right now.

As for doomandglooms comments, vastly inappropriate. I may have some dangly bits at the moment but I am a woman. Assigned sex may be defined by the genetalia, but gender by whats between the ears. The doctor is not to know at the time of a childs birth that they may be mis-assigning that childs sex but it becomes apparent at some point in life.

As for the hair/clothes/makeup comment earlier in the thread (not sure who made it) it is a classic mistake of transfolk to get these things wrong and it really does point a big arrow - finding a supportive friend who can point mistakes etc out is a BIG help - I know. Children learn how to present themselves according to their assigned gender roles and teenage experimentation with looks/clothes etc is something that many transfolk HAVE to go through later in life and thats where the mistakes happen.

VfM4meplse wrote: »

I happen to know that there is an online community of transgender individuals - let's be honest, it's a very small pool of people - who share their experiences around their journeys and other aspects of their transgender lives. Having seen some of the postings, I can tell you it is also full of spiteful people with a sense of entitlement on what is supposed to be a helpful forum. I wonder if your friend is having their thoughts distorted by this group, being dragged down by this negativity? There are some odious people out there OP, you need to help you friend see reality, and that it is a tough employment market out there for everyone, whatever their background or skillset.

Would that be tvchix by chance? Sounds a lot lot lot like it :rotfl: