Transgender Help

robpw2

i guess im lucky , i have met many from all scopes of the specturm , so i suppose i understand a lot more but 12 years ago i didn't know much about them when i met my first trans person and i didnt understand too be fair

Person_one

robpw2 wrote: »

i guess im lucky , i have met many from all scopes of the specturm , so i suppose i understand a lot more but 12 years ago i didn't know much about them when i met my first trans person and i didnt understand too be fair

It was a double misunderstanding, Errata thought we were discussing a transman presenting as a woman so couldn't see what was wrong with bloke, then because of the phrasing he used I was quite shocked as if he HAD been referring to a transWOMAN it would have been pretty offensive!

I think we're all on the same page now though!

Memory_Girl

I agree that she shouldn't mention it unless asked...... but,how to I phrase this delicately? ON a scale of 1 - 10 how does she pass? Does she need more help / training /styling to pass unobtrusively as a female?

Most people when faced with the unknown shy away - and most people will not have had this issue arise in an interview situation and especially if the posts are customer facing may not want to take the risk of having someone appearing "different" representing their company.

My ex-OH is now a post-op transsexual - and for a long time I was the public face of our business, accepting awards and doing press stuff as her perception was "it's hard enough being a woman in business without being a woman-in-training in business".

Best thing we ever did was commit to a programme of voice training, styling, make-up lessons and deportment practice to enable her to pass more effectively.

So I recommend the Beaumont Society link and commend you for your support of your friend through a difficult time.

MG

Oldernotwiser

robpw2 wrote: »

because , they are not blokes , they are women who were born men , they feel like women an they want to be women , i would be offended if someone called me a girl because im not

But you're gay, not transgender so it really doesn't apply.

robpw2

Oldernotwiser wrote: »

But you're gay, not transgender so it really doesn't apply.

thanks older for telling me what i am and am not , its nice that someone has got my life planned out for me

Person_one

Oldernotwiser wrote: »

But you're gay, not transgender so it really doesn't apply.

His sexuality is irrelevant.

He presents himself to the world as a man, so it would be wrong to call him a woman. That's the point.

soupdragon10

All an employer is basically interested in is which person is most able to do the job they are employing them to do.

Do they have the necessary skills, qualifications and experience to do the job? Is their CV selling their skills etc.... and no the fact that someone is transgender does not need to be included on a CV in the same way that age, date of birth, religion etc. should also not be included.

At interview, candidates shoudl all be asked the same questions and scored according to their answers. I doubt very much that any interviewer would ask a candidate if they were transgender (and if they did they should ask all candidates this question).

The employment situation at the moment is apalling, so it may be that your friend needs to think carfully about their approches to job hunting generally.

robpw2

soupdragon10 wrote: »

All an employer is basically interested in is which person is most able to do the job they are employing them to do.

Do they have the necessary skills, qualifications and experience to do the job? Is their CV selling their skills etc.... and no the fact that someone is transgender does not need to be included on a CV in the same way that age, date of birth, religion etc. should also not be included.

At interview, candidates shoudl all be asked the same questions and scored according to their answers. I doubt very much that any interviewer would ask a candidate if they were transgender (and if they did they should ask all candidates this question).

The employment situation at the moment is apalling, so it may be that your friend needs to think carfully about their approches to job hunting generally.

employers shouldnt ask but they do , there was a bridal shop featured on my transexual summer and the only reason they didnt employ the girl was because they were worried about how a trans person would be recieved by their clientelle .

Person_one

robpw2 wrote: »

employers shouldnt ask but they do , there was a bridal shop featured on my transexual summer and the only reason they didnt employ the girl was because they were worried about how a trans person would be recieved by their clientelle .

The idea that employers don't discriminate is a bit silly. Even on the employment board people proudly admit that they don't hire women of childbearing age in case they take maternity leave. People with disabilities and chronic illnesses face all sorts of barriers getting into work.

VfM4meplse

thegirlintheattic wrote: »

Sounds like she is making a big deal about her transgender status and this is what's putting people off.

I agree but think there is more to it than that.

I happen to know that there is an online community of transgender individuals - let's be honest, it's a very small pool of people - who share their experiences around their journeys and other aspects of their transgender lives. Having seen some of the postings, I can tell you it is also full of spiteful people with a sense of entitlement on what is supposed to be a helpful forum. I wonder if your friend is having their thoughts distorted by this group, being dragged down by this negativity? There are some odious people out there OP, you need to help you friend see reality, and that it is a tough employment market out there for everyone, whatever their background or skillset.