17 years old, pregnant...

moomoomama27

Some really vile comments! OP ignore the people who have nothing constructive to say!

I was 17 when my DD was born, I stayed at home with my Mum until I could afford to move out. I think temping is probably your only option for now, if you are well enough to work. No employer will take you on (I'd be surprised), if they knew you were only going to be working for a few months. If you can stay put, at east for a while, and hopefully between you and your bf you can start to save for a deposit on a private rent, and then claim HB once baby is born.

Don't be afraid to claim everything you can right now, that's what the benefits are there for, as a safety net! Go to CAB they will tell you exactly what you can get, and then work damn hard towards your goal. It can be achieved, you don;t have to fall in the benefits trap!

Best of luck xx

jojo_2012_2

I was 17 when I got pregnant with my 1st son (over 10 years ago). I was working part time (Sainsbury's), doing my A Levels, I carried on working. I didn't really know about council housing I just knew some kids got free meals in school .

I put my name on the council list, all the while saving my wages (parents never asked for rent, I was still in education). Gave them a letter from my parents giving me 28days to leave. On the 28th day they put me in a B&B, the owner had strange men sleeping in the living room so I was confined to my room 24/7. To make matters worse I wasn't allowed visitors, you aren't even allowed the father of the baby to visit not that he would of. You have to buy your own food there are no cooking facilities, although a kids pack of rice crispies in a bowl allows them to keep their extra B LOL:rotfl:.The owner of the B&B intentionally set the temperature to furnace like hotness making it impossible to stay :mad:.

Luckily I had saved up enough through part time work and doing overtime while pregnant to afford a deposit and first months rent in a flat so I ran and never looked back. I claimed my then £250 sure start grant (this is now £500 look into it). Went back to work when baby was 3 months old, did enough overtime to be full time so was offered a full time contract.

10 months later I'm offered 'temporary housing' by the council, they only think I'm still living in the B&B!! The owners of the B&B were still claiming the housing benefit for the room! I went to look at the 'temporary flat'. I swear to you it was the smallest most miserable place you've ever seen in your life, so bad I turned it down despite the cushy rental price.

Imagine living in a pokey B&B only to be offered somewhere you can touch all 3 (yes 3) walls of the kitchen at once. I was still on the council list 6 years later despite living in a 1 bedroom flat with the dreaded mould LOL

Now done my degree, working as a nurse full time (for my sins). Never been unemployed. Never did my son any harm. Am now 9 months pregnant, worked full time through this pregnancy too.

My advice would be to stay where you are, deal with the mould in your bedroom (possibly cheaper than deposit and rent). Stay on the council list you may be classed as overcrowded. Try and get a job for yourself. Make your boyfriend get a job even if it's just signing up for agency work.

elvis86

darlyd wrote: »

:eek: What the hell is that supposed to mean?

For your information I was working and on the pill, and with my then bf since school.

I still don't see why that should automatically entitle you to a 2 bed flat "within days"? Most other people don't get money and flats thrown at them when they find out they're pregnant, why should you just because you're stupid enough to get pregnant when you're still a kid yourself and incapable of supporting your child?

I'm glad to hear that it's becoming more difficult for teenagers who decide to have a baby. And by decide I mean those who decide to deliberately get pregnant or those who decide to keep the child if they end up pregnant accidently - they do have a choice, after all..:cool: (With the exception of the Sonia Fowlers of this world, but even they can consider adoption once their surprise baby arrives).

It may be the only way to put off girls who see having kids as a fast-track to a flat and benefits (ie everything that the female youth of Britain's underclass aspire to), now that the precedent has been set with cases such as yours.

DaisyFlower

You could temp to get some wages behind you, you may then even qualify for MA. Most nurseries take babies from 6 weeks so ruling out work until your child is older is a luxury you simply cannot afford at present.

You can work on the room to make it nicer and that way you may avoid benefits altogether. Is a life on benefits really what you want for your child?

Mupette

I must admit, DS was a surprise, the pill and condoms.. yet there was this little surprise, difference was i was 25 and married

pinkclouds

Amanda65 wrote: »

OP if there is not a medical reason for why you shouldn't work, I think you should seriously consider temping. I did it when I was pregnant with DD2 (had given up a business I was running as could no longer carry the stock around but we needed money) and although it was with a company originally for 6 weeks, they kept me on until 2 weeks before I gave birth and had me back as a permanent member of staff after DD was born. Your home study could be done at weekends /evening. I appreciate you will be tired but hey - rather that than bubba not having what they need.

DaisyFlower wrote: »

You could temp to get some wages behind you, you may then even qualify for MA.

You should definitely get some temporary work, if at all possible. However little it is, however menial, for however short a period of time. Whether it's filing in an office or flipping burgers in McDonalds or waiting tables in a greasy spoon cafe. This will hopefully allow you to qualify for the minimum amount of Maternity Allowance. Every little helps and now, before the baby arrives, is the time to do it. Maternity Allowance is different to Statutory Maternity Pay - you don't need to have a permanent employer as it's based on average wages over a set period of time. (Or, National Insurance if you're self-employed but that doesn't apply here.)

Best of luck.

Cat2011

Does your current house have a living room? Presumably it's bigger than the box room you're currently in. Can you swop them over so you have a bit more room? You'd be far better off staying put.

MandM90

Cat2011 wrote: »

Does your current house have a living room? Presumably it's bigger than the box room you're currently in. Can you swop them over so you have a bit more room? You'd be far better off staying put.

Better yet - if you're getting big - the boyfriend should kip on the sofa!

gingin_2

Ria hasnt been on for 24 hours and I am not sure she will be back.

Boyfriend should really be on the floor if you are uncomfortable. Can you borrow a blow up mattress from somewhere? I would check out freecycle, put a "wanted" add up for baby stuff and you might be surprised at the replies, same goes for house stuff. I've put half decent baby stuff on there because I'd rather someone pick it up that have to bother with postage and packaging for peanuts.

Babies really only need milk, warmth, cuddles and interaction and somewhere safe to sleep for the first few months. I would focus on getting pram, moses basket, blankets, babygrows, nappies. Try and resist cute stuff - you won't be benefitting baby with it, they won't have a clue and you know that the money is more needed elsewhere. Breastfeeding will save you a packet in formula milk so do some research beforehand and give it a go.

If boyfriend is out of work, it might be that you have to work instead, whilst he minds baby.

bigmomma051204

Hiya, OP you really need to get a little bit of a grip and grow up! I was 21 when i became pregnant. So not much older than you really.... i was in a stable relationship and everything was fine. My partner, after finding out i was pregnant, became extremely violent (no sign of it before at ALL) and was quite vile to me physically (pushed me down the stairs twice and held knives to my throat on numerous occasions and lots more). The last contact i had with him was a phonecall when i had moved 200miles away to live with my parents - in this phonecall he threatened to come and cut the baby out of me.... i had 2 police officers sitting outside my house that night. I was scared every day for the first 3 years of my childs life. He has never paid me a penny and i wouldnt want him to.

Right, onto my point.... After i returned to my parents, i obviously lost my job as i lived a long way away. I couldnt get a job for love nor money because i was pregnant - i was showing at this point and employers (yes, even temp jobs) were simply NOT interested (tho i agree that u should still TRY to get something).... i was also extremely ill with sickness all day every day from 7 weeks pregnant to 34weeks. I was hospitalised 14 times during that period and unable to get up on many days! I accepted that i couldnt get paid work SO i found a voluntary job (as i was voluntary they of course were happy for me to go in when i was feeling okay etc) in a housing project. This voluntary job has led to my current career and certainly helped me get a job once i was able to return to work. You certainly should not sit around doing NOTHING until baby comes. I agree itll be hard to get paid work but at least do SOMETHING.....contact ur local volunteer bureaux (google) there are TONS of various things u can do and you may find there are projects locally that will pay for ur childcare etc once baby comes so u can continue with the work. Itll be great experience and something to use later in life! If i managed it with severe illness and a scary and certainly NOT supportive ex, you can!!!

I dont understand why u plan on returning to/looking for work once baby is 1yr. What is going to happen once it is 1yr???? Childcare is a FORTUNE and unless you are earning a GOOD wage, what u earn, probably wont cover a 1yr old in full time nursery...so how are u planning on sorting that out?? :cool:

Stay with ur in-laws and do some voluntary work. Dont be another statistic about teen mums not working please!