17 years old, pregnant...

pimento

Gigglepig wrote: »

Some people are pointing out that the baby was an "accident". It may be harsh, to say this, but even if the conception was by accident, however in the UK having a baby is a result also of subsequent choices and decisions (morning after pill, abortion, adoption, private fostering...).

Yes, you don't have to have a baby.

elantan

missbishi wrote: »

What I meant was that she got pregnant BY ACCIDENT, ie, it was not her intention to do so.

I do hope this explanation cools your blood down :eek:

i still dont get this ? i didnt get pregnant by accident and i was only 18 ... what exactly are you trying to say about me ?

elantan

elvis86 wrote: »

Ah, the good old days...:cool:

I for one am glad to hear that spreading your legs no longer automatically entitles a teenage girl to a 2 bed flat and a load of money.

i didnt get any of that ... i think it was cause i was married though ... darn me for wanting to get married .. i couldve had so much more :rotfl::rotfl::rotfl::rotfl:

daska

Ravenlady wrote: »

It would be nice if you could quote my entire reply as I did make it clear it had been a while since I enquired, LHA rules in my area do not make allowances for children under 1 though so they may only still get 1 bedroom rate after the baby is born.

That's generous of them, I've just been informed by my support worker that my local council no longer allow a bedroom for a child until they're 5! (TBH I haven't double checked so this might be wrong.)

Darlyd

elvis86 wrote: »

Ah, the good old days...:cool:

I for one am glad to hear that spreading your legs no longer automatically entitles a teenage girl to a 2 bed flat and a load of money.

:eek: What the hell is that supposed to mean?

For your information I was working and on the pill, and with my then bf since school.

MandM90

tescobabe69 wrote: »

It is virtually impossible to get pregnant by accident.
Or are people having sex by accident nowadays?

Less impossible than you may think. I got pregnant on the pill at the age of 17 and couldn't go through with the abortion. I didn't realise until I was quite far along.

I stayed with my parents (is it not an option for the OP to stay with parents apart from her partner?) whilst sitting my A Levels - and achieving 4 As(!) - and while my OH went to uni. He now has a Maths degree and a good job as a result, and this year it is my turn I start my Chemistry degree at a top five uni in Sept after working since school. Our daughter is thriving and we've managed to bring her up without a penny of debt and sent her to private school. It doesn't have to be a horror story.

OP; you can work whilst pregnant. I went to school and worked a part time job in a restaurant. Baby things are expensive. Unless your medical problems are severe, in which case your OH should be working two jobs as soon as he can find them! If you want to go to college/full time education you can get help with childcare. If you choose to work, you can get tax credits to help with childcare. There's no reason you can't crack on with making the best of this awkward situation now, one way or another. You need a plan. There's no reason you can't to anything whilst pregnant or with a small baby.

From what I have heard about council houses, you are better off not spending a PENNY these next two months and using OHs wages to put a deposit down on a cheap private rent. Many baby things can be found on Freecycle, eBay or from friends/family if you ask (my daughter slept in a solid wooden cotbed for 4 years that cost me £20 from eBay, and it's now been passed to someone else!)

You're probably better off asking on the benefits board about entitlement.

Good luck.

BugglyB

darlyd wrote: »

:eek: What the hell is that supposed to mean?

For your information I was working and on the pill, and with my then bf since school.

I just wouldn't respond to that sort of post. 'Spreading your legs' indeed. How does that come under 'be nice to all Moneysavers'?

MandM90

elvis86 wrote: »

Ah, the good old days...:cool:

I for one am glad to hear that spreading your legs no longer automatically entitles a teenage girl to a 2 bed flat and a load of money.

Whilst I would never advocate making a career out of baby making, the benefits are there to stop children growing up in complete poverty and living in unsuitable accommodation. I'm not sure how much money people get but I'd hazard a guess that it isn't loads.

daska

OP, I'm another one who would urge you to stay put and for several reasons. Financially, it's not just the cost of finding somewhere to rent and the deposit, it's furniture, bedlinen, towels, cleaning products, a basic larder. And it's utilities as well, all those things you take for granted until you leave home, heating, hot water, lights, cooker etc plus water, tv licence etc. Possibly even carpets and curtains. And everything in the fridge and cupboards has to be paid for and put there by you. Becoming parents can be a shock, even when you're financially secure and it's all planned (even for that matter when you already have children LOL). You do not have the benefit of experience, planning or financial security so take advantage of what you do have - experienced parents on-site for back up and no substantial financial worries. Young relationships can fail so easily (not a dig but at 17 you haven't had the time to develop a long term relationship) and having babies and moving house are two of the most stressful things you can impose on yourself, give yourselves a chance to settle in to parenthood (I was going to use the term 'bed-in' but I guess that's too much of a pun LOL) and save up sufficient deposit to get yourselves somewhere decent to live.

My suggestion would be to use a little of what you've saved and your 2nd trimester energy to smarten up the room a bit, wash down those walls and clean the curtains, sort out storage etc. You'll get a lot of help and advice on non-toxic cleaning strategies over on the the OLD STYLE board. Look on the FREEBIES and LOW SPEND boards for baby bits and sign up to your local Freecycle/Freegle/Facebay and source as much of your baby needs from there as possible.

Best of luck

daska

MandM90 wrote: »

Whilst I would never advocate making a career out of baby making, the benefits are there to stop children growing up in complete poverty and living in unsuitable accommodation. I'm not sure how much money people get but I'd hazard a guess that it isn't loads.

Child specific benefits are up to about £80/week (£20 Child Benefit + Child Tax Credits). Plus whatever the adult/s would qualify for i.e. IS, JSA, ESA HB etc. It's not a life of luxury.