17 years old, pregnant...

MandM90

bigmomma051204 wrote: »

I dont understand why u plan on returning to/looking for work once baby is 1yr. What is going to happen once it is 1yr???? Childcare is a FORTUNE and unless you are earning a GOOD wage, what u earn, probably wont cover a 1yr old in full time nursery...so how are u planning on sorting that out?? :cool:

Stay with ur in-laws and do some voluntary work. Dont be another statistic about teen mums not working please!

I understand they offer working tax credits to help recoup childcare costs. All else fails, get a childcare NVQ. At DDs old nursery the kids of staff went there free, no wonder they popped them out like no ones business :rotfl:

Childminders can be a cheaper option if you can find a good one, and if you are both working it'll work out much better than not!

claire16c

Cat2011 wrote: »

Does your current house have a living room? Presumably it's bigger than the box room you're currently in. Can you swop them over so you have a bit more room? You'd be far better off staying put.

I cant imagine the in-laws are going to want to give up their living room.

j.e.j.

RiaPenido wrote: »

Hi I joined to get some serious advice as the council, the job centre, etc. have been absolutely useless giving me advice on what my next step is.

So what I need to know is what help is available for us to help us get our own flat? Or what would be our best option We've looked at budgeting loans, crisis loans, and various things but we are very very confused. So please could anyone give me some decent advice? Without judging my life choices would be great aswell

I doubt she'll be back, but I hope the OP gets on ok and manages to find something suitable. Calling the thread '17 and pregnant' inevitably meant getting some judgemental and uncalled-for remarks.

I would have said ask over on the benefits board but having read some of the threads on there I think they'd probably be even worse to her :eek::rotfl:

zoelouise88

tescobabe69 wrote: »

It is virtually impossible to get pregnant by accident.
Or are people having sex by accident nowadays?

C'mon surely you've accidently slipped and landed on a **** before :rotfl:

On a serious note though, i assume she means the condom broke.

zoelouise88

Just want to wish you luck OP, and believe me when i say things will get better - ignore some of the rude people on here.

I was 17 when i fell pregnant wasnt planned wasnt an accident, i was young and stupid i agree and yes i was on benefits and was given a council flat (even without the baby i would have gotten one as i was kicked out by my mother at 14 and then at 16 council placed me in a B&B while waiting for a council property.) anyhow 6months after my son was born his dad got a well paid job and we couldnt have been happier - for us our unplanned baby was the best thing that could ever have happened, if it hadnt id have probably been out on the streets drinking, taking drugs and causing trouble like my mates were.

eldo

Dear OP, my advice...stay strong and work hard.It's easy for others to judge, when they've not been in your shoes. Often when they do, it just highlights insecurities and shortfallings in themselves. I do think your expectations are high, but that's because you're only 17,and at that age you still have your childhood dreams and childlike expectations-life hasn't knocked you back yet (in hindsight,most of us would be much wiser people!).It will be tough,tough,tough! People on here, making such judgemental comments are of no use to you-surround yourself with people who love you and people you can learn from. When you are 17,you are naive, not stupid.Some come through unscathed (and judgemental), others get caught out (that's life!). I had a baby at 17. That baby is now at university! I have a son who starts uni next year(he has also gained county honours in cricket and been put forward for county trials in rugby!).I have a 14 year old daughter who is in all top sets at school, which makes me proud. Her school report says she has a strong work ethic-that makes me prouder! Life is going to be hard from now on. I remember being very,very scared, but work hard each day to make your life, and the life of your baby better than anything you've ever had before.It's not about materialism,just love your baby and work hard-it will pay off. I now have a very successful business and my children have had a good start in life! Work, work, work-then work some more!!! Give your baby the chances you didn't have!

bunnybunnyrabbit

I do think it's a bit unfair to be so judgmental when this poor girl just came on here for a bit of advice! Regardless of how it happened she is pregnant now and determined to make sure her baby is not homeless!

Has your partner considered asking his parents for a loan to pay the deposit on a privately rented place? They may be happy to help (especially if it means they don't have to put up with a screaming baby in a few months time!)

You could also try approaching your council for a Homebond to cover the deposit on a privately rented place. I'm not sure about your area but my local council have this. Often the council will be looking at the long term and see that by supplying this bond of a few hundred quid they could save themselves lots of money in the long term (i.e. putting you in emergency accommodation, rehousing you).

Also, if you were to go into privately rented accommodation before your baby is born you would only be entitled to the one-bed LHA rate. What you may also get to top it up until your entitlement changes (when your baby is born) is a Discretionary Housing Payment. Ask your local council's housing benefit department about this as they do this in my area.

Best of luck

Emmarillo

You need to find out why the room is mouldy and then you can treat it. Quite often it's poor ventilation which is easily remedied although the room would have to be treated and curtains etc binned.

I definitely think your best option is to stay with your inlaws and save all you can. The room may be too small,and a single bed uncomfortable for you to share, but (not a very romantic idea) bunk beds would solve your problem. You quite often see them on Freecycle (also a great way to get baby bits).

You have to get a job - I don't live that far from you and often see jobs advertised. Convenience stores often need someone and it's worth asking even if they don't have a sign up. Cleaners always seem to be needed too and they don't earn bad money, I don't think. My mum pays hers £22 per hour! These are both jobs which you would be able to do for about four more months and could help you build up some savings. I was sick as a dog through both my pregnancies but still worked (part time during the second one), we couldn't afford for me not to.

Things will work out for you and your little family if you make the effort. Ok 17 is young, but people cope - a lot of my friends are having their first babies in their early 40's and although they are in a much better financial situation than you, I think it could bring its own problems.

Good luck.

emweaver

Elle7 wrote: »

Housing benefit will be quite limited - the rates are going down, whereas rents only seem to be going up.

If you give a rough idea of your area, we can check your local housing benefit rate - the maximum they will pay per week. If your housing costs less then this, they'll pay it (you don't get to keep the extra anymore) or if it costs more you'll need to make it up yourself. The new system doesn't depend on personal circumstances or anything - just a weekly limit, which it can be hard to find rents under, so you'll need to be realistic.

If your boyfriend starts work again, you'll need to tell them and they will reduce your housing benefit (now called LHA) and any income benefits you'll get. Will you qualify for income support when the baby comes? What do you do at the moment?

As for a deposit - this is the problem most people have. Council waiting lists are very large, and you might find you are not priority - both because you already have somewhere to live, and because you have not yet given birth. When you do give birth, if you were kicked out or didn't have anywhere to live, you'd probably find they'd house you in a B&B for a while, but it'd be for just you and the baby - not your partner, who still wouldn't be high priority. Some people do get flats quite fast, but the vast majority its a very slow process even if you get into a high priority band.

You'll need either a family friend or family to lend it to you, or to apply for a crisis loan if they cover deposits - housing benefit won't.

Dont worry they will house your boyfriend in B&B I know 2 people who had the same and both of their boyfriends went with them as they were both evicted.

pyjamadays

hi, i haven't read all of this so it's maybe been mentioned, but if you are on the housing list and a house doesn't become available then most local councils have a scheme where they act as a guarantor for a private house/landlord. im not sure exactly how it works you would have to ask them, but as far as i know you find a house and then the coucnil write a letter to the landlord then all you need to worry about is finding the rent.
if you look at the 'entitled to' website and follow the calculations it will tell you what benefits you will get, it will also put you onto a link to find out what the local LHA for your are is. not sure if this still exists but about 11 weeks before your due you can apply for a maternity grant which is about £500 to pay for things you need for the baby. you have to be on certain benefits for this tho, i think JSA is one.
good luck x