Making the future happen - museumworker's MFW diary Pt 2

greent

Grrrr! Re the SATs boosters I have 2 at secondary school (both at single sex grammars after passing 11+) - I told them that I didn't care if they scored badly in their SATs and NOT to worry about it in ANY way, as it's no refection on them, it's for the school's benefit. Not that they did score badly in any way, but it does annoy me that so much emphasis is put on it and that children are pushed about it - and as for 'compulsory' Saturday school - no way would I let my children attend - I'm not sure what grounds the school could try and make people attend, tbh


Yeay re Monsoon top (yeay re possibility of selling, rather than yeay it being too small!!)


x

museumworker

I know greent, they really do pile on the pressure. DD really wants to 'achieve her year' i.e. get a level 6 in yr 6 and is getting quite stressed about it. I've told her I really don't care what grade she gets, as long as she tries her hardest (had to say that otherwise she might not behave in class for the next 4 months; all they seem to be doing is SATs!) I've also told her that secondary retests straight away anyway, that seemed to cheer her up as its not an 'all or nothing' thing for her, IYSWIM.

Laughing that L O V E L Y has been !!!!ed out earlier! The mind boggles.

What an exhausting day; so glad its over. OH cooked a lovely tea before going out, a jamie 15 mins one - cauliflower, chickpea and pineapple keralan curry. Plenty left over to take to work with some thins for lunch. Have been picked for free low alcohol wine trial, with chance to win vouchers (yay!) and also asked if will do free trial of online tutoring service, in return for being a case study.

Pearla*Merle

museumworker wrote: »

Pearla*Merle - sorry to hear you suffer from migraines too, they really are awful. Have you identified any triggers? My main one is release from stress. I worked with a health psychologist on the NHS - had about 20 sessions. It completely revolutionized my health. At my worst I was getting about 15 a month. After working with the health psychologist and taking a low level of amitryptiline my attacks were down to only 1 every couple of months. More recently I've been off the medication, and have had some really awful migraine attacks, but only about 6-8 in a month, and never as long lasting as they were before. I'm about to go back on the medication. If you're interested in seeing a health psychologist, it would be worth speaking to your doctor, or seeing if you can refer yourself. I had to go through the mental health services (outsourced in my area), and they were so professional and understanding and didn't treat me like I was a crazy (unlike the neurologist, but that's another story!)

Anyway, the method we used was called ACT (Acceptance Commitment Therapy) which is a form of mindfulness based cognitive therapy. The Happiness Trap is a fantastic practical guide to it - you can download the first chapter and other freebies here: http://www.thehappinesstrap.com/. The basic premise is you learn to accept and not struggle with difficult emotions and feelings (including physical ones), and instead focus on living your values. Honestly, completely life changing. I hope you find something that works for you soon.

Apologies for the tardy reply, museumworker, I've been a bit all over the place the last few weeks and am just catching up properly now but I just wanted to say a HUGE THANK YOU for this! I've been coming to the vague realisation that a lot of what you mention above (acceptance/living my values) is what I should be focussing on but to see it written down in black & white like that has well and truly pinged the lightbulb on! When I have odd moments of truly focussing and actively bringing these things into my life then suddenly I feel a massive shift in myself (and of course the symptoms disappear rather rapidly), I suppose the universe is well & truly telling me to change things up and I should take heed! I'll be taking a close look into The Happiness Trap, thank you so much for the link.

Triggers are the pill (oh, the joys of being a girl), and then stress loaded on top tips everything over the edge. Usually doing exercise helps to minimise the stress element but then I couldn't do it when I was ill with migraines, so it all became a bit of a vicious circle. I thought I'd sorted the pill stuff out (I changed the one I was on a couple of months ago and I'd been pretty much free migraines since) but I've just been hit by another couple of weeks of really severe ones again so back to the doctors I go to sort that out. I shall definitely being asking them about the health psychologist, they never offered me anything like that before, tsk. (I shall definitely look into seeing if I can refer myself if they're not forthcoming with it, thanks for the tip!) I was experiencing the same level of migraines as you at my worst, rolling from one to another every few days without ever really getting out of it, I didn't know whether I was coming or going. I tried amitryptiline which got rid of them almost completely but made me so drowsy I couldn't get off the sofa or stop napping(!), so had to come off it. I thought it had helped reset my system as they didn't return immediately but they slowly crept back on before I knew it. What a palaver this stuff is. Feel so excited to have these new things to explore though, thank you

PS. Ooh, the Bic Biro Challenge sound like fun Very tempted! ....my OH has just said he'll give me £10 for not doing it, apparently he doesn't want to loose me to a biro. :rotfl:

PPS. The school stuff is super shocking! I can't believe they can get away with all this kind of nonsense these days. It's just ludicrous on so many levels. It's hard to see how it'll change, but I blinking well hope it does before any child of mine arrives on the scene.

museumworker

Lovely to hear from you Pearla*Merle - so sorry to hear you've had such a bad spell . I'm really glad to hear my post has struck a chord. Totally understand about the vicious cycle - exercise is the last thing I want to do when I'm in a migraine phase, even though I know it'd help in the long run!

Re: the pill (and sorry if a bit personal) are you on progesterone only? My doctor put me on a combined one (even though I said I couldn't) and I got headaches immediately. I then got the Cerazette - the progesterone only one with a 12 hour window. A lot of the mini-pills you have to take the same time everyday and I knew that would never work for me! It was the most expensive on the market, so the GP was reluctant to give it to me, but the headaches stopped immediately. I ended up taking it for 3 1/2 migraine free years (bliss!).

A health psychologist is a fairly new type of post, it was the neurologist who recommended it as treatment but the GP had never heard of it and said it didn't exist. It was only once I was assessed by the mental health services team that I was offered it.

I really hope you manage to get the help you need. Keep me updated with how you're getting on!

Dr Russ Harris is the author of the Happiness Trap, there's quite a few interviews with him on youtube - I liked this one on acceptance: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mQTvFdbjlxw

One thumbful of ink down on the Bic Challenge! I think taking your husband's money sounds like a easier deal though .

museumworker

Morning! 85p on onep0ll this morning (I WILL reach payout before this baby comes!) Must, must, must get on there daily. Being bought lunch today .

tootallulah

Hi MW just read the SATS post! really outrageous and whilst I don't have children I can't imagine sending mine on a Saturday unless it was for their benefit/enjoyment. I hope all is good with you and yours and that being pregnant means you are migraine free.

museumworker

Hi toots, good to see you. Unfortunately I'm having a crisis at the minute that I can't really talk about - let's just say I've had the worst day of my life this week. I've been signed off sick for a week with stress, so am resting up and trying to get my head in order. OH is being incredibly supportive.

Am trying to focus on normal things - finances, straightening the house etc. I have my sister coming to stay for a night tomorrow which am looking forward to, and has given me the push to get the spare room sorted.

Finance-wise, I've had my first win of the year - a £50 Mr S voucher . That has really cheered me up - hoping to use it on a shop and OP the cash. 55p on onep0ll, and been selected for free dishwasher tablet trial. And I had an unexpected credit to my wage slip which has left me about £180 up after tax. OH has been paid but I'm awaiting my money to land.

But with a bit of money shuffling, have made a £129 OP from council tax free month plus £638 OP from 'leftover' salary = £797 OP.

mouche

Hope whatever is bothering you works out quickly MW. And great news about the Mr. S voucher!

museumworker

Thanks mouche - am hoping for a quick resolution.

Got up to £1.25 on 1poll today, that's my best ever amount! And spent WAY too much time on computer entering comps, am hoping that some will pay off. Spare room spick and span, a shoulder of lamb bought from butchers ready to roast for sis tomorrow, DD collected from drama (and finally paid for said drama ), and ordered DD some boots *I think* she might like (have been looking for 2 months! And her last pair are a size too small). She wanted Dr Ms, but at £100 a pair I had to say no, especially with growing feet. The ones I found were £26, a lot more reasonable. She's getting to that age where she won't wear any old thing!

tootallulah

Hi MW sorry to hear that your are having a stressful time, I hope that all is resolved satisfactorily soon. Enjoy time with your sister.