Frump to Fab - Summer Solstice Sizzler

lessonlearned

podperson wrote: »

Hi all,

evilsquid - another example of 'rules of procotol' from businesses with not the slightest bit of common sense or empathy Would agree with trying to get someone higher up - or try one of the debt management companies like cccs, they will help you work out a budget and repayment plan and to deal with your creditors. Often you find that banks etc are more likely to come to an agreement with them as well since they deal with them all the time.

I am sorry if I've got this wrong PP but I'm not even sure that the Law Society will accept a debt management company being on board here. My advice Evilsquid is to tread very very carefully. The last thing you want is to jeopardise your future prospects.

I do know from my previous life working in the financial services industry that any hint of "financial improbity", debt or financial mismanagement and you are well and truly scuppered. You have to be seen to be squeaky clean - yes I know - given what the banks and the City get away with the rules seem laughable.

My understanding is that the same applies with the Law. Just be careful not to burn any bridges. I was a legal secretary many years ago and I remember that my background was very carefully scrutinised.

I agree with Maman here re any old job doing for now.

Evilsquid I know you may not like the idea and I do understand how galling it must be to train, study and work hard for qualifications and then have to set your sights far lower than what you are skilled to do. However, might it not be time to take just any old minimum wage McJob for now, even if it's just part time.

10 hours per week on a minimum wage job would be equivalent to JSA and leave you exactly where you are now (assuming you get no other benefits). You would then be free to work more hours and that would be profit. So you could either be lucky and get a job with more hours, do two or more part time jobs, or take whatever hours you can get and then make up your money working for yourself. Even as a cleaner doing private work you can charge anything between £7 to £12 per hour. All you need is a pair of rubber gloves.

I know it's not what you want, however, don't think of it as a backward move, just a sideways step - a means to an end. You need to play the long game here, protect your "financial reputation" for the sake of your long term career prospects. You are young, you have time on your side.

As you know my DS2 has a degree and still ended up working in a garden centre for the princely sum of £6-50 an hour. He has stuck this out for 2.5 years. I have been desperate for him to try and better himself but I am realistic enough to know that the drive must come from him. I know that his confidence took an almighty hit and for a while he was happy just to have a job, any old job.

I'm pleased to say that after a lot of soul searching he has now realised that his dream of working in the media is not to be and he has put together Plan B. Just last week he begun studying to become an Electrical Engineer. (He could still work in the media - they need electrical contractors).

His studies for the first part of his qualification are by and large similar to OU, i.e. distance and e-learning with some practical work done on a residential training course. This means he can continue working and earning. Part 2 of his qualification will mean he will have to find a placement with an electrical contractor. He's realised he too needs to play a long game and that the garden centre represents a means to an end.

He will be 26 next month. As I've pointed out by the time he is 30 he will be well qualified in a profession which will always be needed, he can be self employed, master of his own destiny and able to call all the shots.

Right now Evilsquid it's crunch time. Your back is against the wall and you need to come out fighting. Don't default on your loan, try and negotiate a breathing space and find some paid work to tide you over. You can still keep looking for the legal secretary job, there's no need to give up on your dreams.

Please don't think that a future employer i.e. law firm will look down on you because you are doing menial low paid work. Far from it.

And ...................before anyone shoots me down for saying this - I'm only voicing what many employers who have no real understanding of the current job market think ..........

If you are working - even if it's only bar work or waitressing - you will be far more likely to impress an employer than a candidate who is seen to be "just languishing on benefits". I know that's grossly unfair but it is the way some employers will think.

Speaking of languishing....

I've just been to see OH - I'm afraid he's still dipping and is not too well at all today. They are monitoring him closely. His temperature reads normal but there's definitely something wrong, his breathing is very shallow and ragged. I guess it's just another sign that his illness continues to progress and there is little to be done...

podperson

lessonlearned wrote: »

I am sorry if I've got this wrong PP but I'm not even sure that the Law Society will accept a debt management company being on board here. My advice Evilsquid is to tread very very carefully. The last thing you want is to jeopardise your future prospects.

I do know from my previous life working in the financial services industry that any hint of "financial improbity", debt or financial mismanagement and you are well and truly scuppered. You have to be seen to be squeaky clean - yes I know - given what the banks and the City get away with the rules seem laughable.

My understanding is that the same applies with the Law. Just be careful not to burn any bridges. I was a legal secretary many years ago and I remember that my background was very carefully scrutinised.


No, I do agree and personally have very little experience in the Law field but have done a bit in finance in the past and found that while they could be flexible (if they wanted to) on a few defaults/missed payments then they would frown on anything worse eg a CCJ. So, while involving a debt company might not be ideal it sounds like it has already got to the first stage so anything that can provide a bit of 'damage control' and stop it getting to the second stage might be worth a try.

evilsquid1603

thank you podperson, Bitsy Beans, LL and Maman. I've filled in a budget form they sent me and a covering letter to go with it. she told me to send in a proposal and I've worked out the max i can go to is £70 and thats with my parents agreeing to forgo the £50 rent to pay them off, just got to wait for them to decide what to do. she warned me it would be at least a few days. tried to get through to citizens advice but nobody was picking up, might have to go into the branch.

I know i have to be really careful with it all, if it goes as far as court i can't be a solicitor. I'm hoping one of them at the bank will see sense and realise cutting me out of what they loaned me the money to train for in the first place probably isn't the best way forward.

I'm hoping they just were being hard lined because they have to warn me about it to cover their own backs. she said making random payments to it when i can shows willing and does look good so I've paid in the £35 i had in my savings account. we get our deposit back from our flat we were in before this week so at least i can meet next months payment. she said its too late for this month and its gone down on my permanent credit record as a missed payment, will affect all my borrowing ability inc. mortgages and they won't put a note on saying why or allow me to do anything about it.

if they insist on taking it further unless i pay up, i do have an inheritance off my grandma. it was linked to the stock market so its drastically reduced in value and has to be properly cashed in and sorted out by my dad so i could get my hands on it but it would take me a few weeks to do. might give me a year or so breathing space with them. it was supposed to be for a house deposit but looks like i don't have much choice anymore.

I'm starting an application to the Navy this week, I'm sick of being turned down for everything. the annoying thing is I've applied for bar work, Slimming World Consultant and Liz Earle party consultant jobs and i think I'm getting turned down because they can see that i have 2 degrees and will quite clearly be off the minute i get a law job. I've tried doing a "dumbed down" CV with just a-levels and my jobs on but because there were times when i was just in education the past 5 years look bare as though i've done nothing but done odd jobs and bummed around. theres also a massive gap from sept 2008 to working in a college library from aug 2010 to aug 2011 that i have no other way to "explain" without mentioning i was doing another degree.

one of my friends works in the bar at a premier inn and he's given his manager my name, apparently they are always hiring. he does 2/3 shifts a week and comes out with more than the JSA both DH and I get for the entire month, hopefully something will come of it.

also go the problem that the lower end of the job scale with bar and shop work is almost exclusively taken by all the students from the 3 uni's here so that end of it all is already completely saturated.

LL, sorry to hear about DH. xx

Bitsy_Beans wrote: »

Evilsquid have a hug xxx just had a look at the website of the solicitors where I used to work, no job vacancies nor at my H's company (both places have offices in Manchester). Are you signed up to any agencies with a view to being able to do some temping work in the meantime? Could you write off some letters with your CV to some of the large solicitors asking their [STRIKE]Human Remains[/STRIKE] sorry Human Resources can keep your details on file should a secretarial vacancy became available? Xxx

thank you for looking for me I'm going to try the agencies this week, one of my mums friends used some a while ago while she as in between jobs. I'm going to send off a load of emails this week. hopefully one might work!

WelshWoofer

Evil squid - so sorry to hear about your money worries. I don't really have any advice to add but just wanted to give you a bit of virtual moral support.

LL - hope OH picks up a little, it must be so worrying for you. xx

LW - I know what yoiu mean about woofers being friends - mine is my best friend (may sound a bit sad but dogs are much more loyal than people and love you unconditionally).


Had another madly busy day - roll on the exams (3 weeks), at least after them it will calm down a bit.

Someone told me at work that they thought I'd a bit of weight (I haven't!) Still, it made me feel better:)I need to do a bit of maintainance fabbing tonight - nails, defuzzing and maybe a scrub. Don't want to slip back into the bad old ways.

Some disappointing news today about the dog walking meet up group - they've closed down due to no-one wanting to take over the organising. I just don't have the time to take something else on at the moment and am torn between saying I'll do it and not wanting to let people down. That's my problem really, I hardly ever say no to things and then end up running around like a headless chicken!

lessonlearned

evilsquid1603 wrote: »

I've filled in a budget form they sent me and a covering letter to go with it. she told me to send in a proposal and I've worked out the max i can go to is £70 and thats with my parents agreeing to forgo the £50 rent to pay them off, just got to wait for them to decide what to do. she warned me it would be at least a few days. tried to get through to citizens advice but nobody was picking up, might have to go into the branch.

LL, sorry to hear about DH. xx

This sounds promising. Good luck.

It never rains but it pours ..............

I mentioned that my darling OH seems unwell today, so of course I've been rather low and tearful as a result. Then my little sister rang me tonight. She is really poorly again with a recurring neck injury and her husband has a really nasty flare up of gout. They are due to fly out to Australia on Sunday to visit his mum who is in the final stages of Parkinsons.

My poor DS2 is all concern and has been feeding me chocolate and making cups of tea. Bless him.

Anyway, I'm off to try and sleep now. X

bratz81

podperson - little and often is a good idea. I'm hoping to lose a little more weight/tone up as we're joining a gym after the wedding when we can afford it, so I'm loath to buy new things I can only wear a few times and then they don't fit!

lessonlearned

Good Morning Ladies

It has been some time since I assigned you any homework. Usually it's done in a spirit of fun - this task is rather more serious minded.

I would ask you to do something for me out of friendship.

Would you please read the following thread - sorry don't know how to do a proper link.

"Being Abused" by DarknessGetsMe. You will find it on the Marriage and Relationship Board. Then, if you would be so kind, post a little note to offer the poor girl your support.

I know we all have our problems - but nothing, nothing like this.

I know my OH is slowly dying - I've no idea when - could be months, could be years. However, we've had 30 or so wonderful happy years and he will leave me with two fine sons and a lifetime of happy memories.

My sorrow, my grief, my aches and pains, my financial woes are nothing compared to what this poor girl has suffered.

If you can offer a few kind words to encourage her and give her a boost please do so.

It's a truly filthy day here - is it worth even bothering to style my hair before I go out??? I'm off to get pummelled at physic :eek:and then going to call in and see Mum & Dad. I don't really feel up to it TBH but it's been nearly 3 weeks since I've seen them and I feel really guilty. Heigh-ho.

Have a good day everyone. X

PS Just edited because I went back and double checked the name of the thread. I noticed that you had already posted Tru.

[Deleted User]

Morning All
It sounds like many of you are having a real hard time. Sending you all hugs :grouphug:.

Fabbing today:
Shower, moisturise
Fix face - cleanse, moisturise. Order new Sheer cover make up
Walk at local park
Join local community centre and book a game of squash - dig out the raquets from the loft

podperson

Morning all,

evilsquid - hope things look up soon - it always seems to all happen at once doesn't it

LL - hope OH and the rest of the family are feeling better soon, bless your DS2 - you've trained him well I actually think I read the post you mentioned, poor girl has been so brave but it is heartbreaking to read how worthless her scumbag of an ex has made her feel she is.

bratz - I'm hoping to lose some weight as well so figure no point in buying lots of new things (even if I could afford it!) but am trying to get a few bits so I don't fall into my usual trap of thinking that I'll only buy things when I lose the weight and then looking like a complete scruff in my old, ill-fitting things in the meantime

Allie - sounds like a busy day, have fun

Anyway, choir last night, was good to be back, especially on 2 hours rehearsals! Actually felt up to going for a drink afterwards again so was nice to be able to have a catch-up with some people. OH is getting along well with the dvd, we have a 'taster' song on youtube if anyone would like a look

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vhaDfR_1BXw&feature=share

we're trying to be a viral sensation or something like that :rotfl:so feel free to pass along (and see if you can spot me!)
Unfortunately have a ton of work to do this morning so better get back to it. Hope everyone has a good day x

Bitsy_Beans

Ok Podperson which one are you?!
I LOVE it just what I needed as a pick me up on this awful day. I would love to sing in a choir nearly as much as I Love Footloose :T
Well done to you all. Have to say I love the bloke with greyish hair on the front row.....he looks like he's having a real blast :j