Is my brother being cheeky?

Former_MSE_Penelope

Money Moral Dilemma: Is my brother being cheeky??

Six months ago my little brother was out of work and asked me to lend him £500 to help out. He eventually got a job, which he hated, was down in the dumps for a long time, and decided he'd save up to go backpacking for a year. He's since managed to save a few grand. While I think the trip will be good for him, I also think it's cheeky to save £1,000s and rather than pay me back, go on a holiday. Should I ask for it back or leave it?

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Seaside_Lass

There is an old saying "neither a borrower nor lender be" and it makes sense. Lending money, especially to relatives, often leads to animosity when it is not paid back as quickly as the lender had hoped.
My daughter recently lent her brother £200 to pay a bill when he had not been paid for a job that he had done. He promised to pay her back the following week, once he had been paid. 3 weeks later he had still not paid her but went out and bought luxury food items and a newly released computer game for himself.
Needless to say, my daughter is not happy :mad:

So yes, you should ask for it back.

claire16c

If hes saved thousands then he could just take £500 out of that and repay her. He could always then work a couple of extra weeks before he leaves to make up the shortfall. Then it wouldnt be an issue! But yes he should pay her back before he leaves.

So if it was me Id say thats great about your trip, now youre back on your feet, would you mind paying me the £500 before you leave, as with being out of the country for the next few months (cant see a few thousand lasting an entire year unless he spent the whole time in asia!) would make it easiest to pay me back now. As its a sibling I dont see why it should be difficult to ask.

jamespir

he should have given it back before he went

BitterAndTwisted

£500 to help out while someone is unemployed should be repaid as soon as the person is back in gainful employment even if it meant only paying a fiver or a tenner out of the first week's pay-packet. Certainly a long time before thousands have been amassed for travelling

Person_one

I'd happily lend my brother £500, but I'd also feel completely comfortable asking why he hadn't paid it back if he was spending thousands on a holiday. I can't think of any reason not to, if you're close enough to lend you should be close enough to talk about it openly.

babymoo

Ive lent my brother money in the past which has always been repaid but usually after asking him once or twice, he knows I won't stop asking for it until it is paid back and it never causes ructions between us. Just ask him for it back and keep asking till you get it and if it causes arguments then it's probably the best £500 spend getting rid of someone who isn't trustworthy out of your life.

fannyanna

I'd happily lend money to my family and have also been lent money by my family.

This is a priority debt to repay in my opinion and most definately should be repaid before going travelling.

Your brother is 100% out of order!

scotsbob

He's blood, if you need it ask for it if you don't then let it lie.

purple.sarah

If he can afford £1000s for a luxury like a holiday he can afford to pay you back £500 first and that should be his priority! He wasn't too ashamed to ask you for money, don't be ashamed to ask for it back! And I wouldn't lend to him in the future!

scoobydoobydoo

Yes, you should ask, he is taking the proverbial and probably hoping you have forgotten about it