unfairness in school. rant

denton6

dirtysexymonkey wrote: »

once they misbehave they should have to prove that they have changed their ways.

you dont seem to be able to grasp that not everyone is a bleeding heart liberal who thinks that kids should be rewarded for misbehaving and bribed to not mess about. its that sort of thinking that has created the problems our society has today.

hand on heart i would honestly say they dont have many children who cause problems in there school, im sure those kids have picked up on it also that only the same people are chosen.

denton6

Jojo_the_Tightfisted wrote: »

DD's primary school had a few children like that.

Purely coincidentally, their mothers were all part of the PTA clique. And no, you couldn't join as a non clique parent, as they would put you in charge of the portaloos or bins at the summer fete or doing the washing up at the Christmas fayre, up in the staff room, well away from all the christmas related activities, not seeing a soul all day.



Their children were always picked, despite their being largely unpopular with the other children due to meanness, mostly, along with having the attitude that they owned the class. Oh, and they were picked to be the class representatives as their mothers would go in and stress how devastated their child would be if somebody else's kid, whose parent wasn't a Governor/fundraiser/etc, were to be put forward for it.


Eventually, when the Head heard enough people say in the playground when presented with newsletters 'so what's Lucy B picked up the credit for this time?' and when special prizegivings were made, 'Where's Lucy B's prize for being the best student this term?' ('Lucy B' being the mother, whose entire self worth and importance was tied up with her daughters being picked for everything) and he himself was faced with Lucy B furious that a new teacher who 'doesn't understand MY daughters always get picked' choosing to photograph my child for the cover of the school prospectus, a discreet request was sent around for teachers to ensure that a wide range of children are considered for special occasions.


It happens. Now her eldest is at senior school and is as invisible as the rest of them. Oh, except that they chose my daughter on a couple of occasions for the receiving prizes, etc. There was a trail of feathers spat from the main hall all the way to the car park on those evenings :whistle:

well done to your daughter, ive got to laugh at the pta suggestion, im actually the chair on our group, that's how i know the school, head and kids so well. Wouldnt want my child to be favoured for it though, maybe that is why he doesnt get picked.

luxor4t

There were always "golden children" (my friend's name for them) when our kids were in Primary ... and that was over 11 years ago. Some were clearly deserving - pleasant, well-mannered, hard-working & thoroughly likeable - others had qualities that were far harder to spot. Like real life, fairness didn't seem to apply.

Person_one

Tiddlywinks wrote: »

I agree with this...

The school will want the smartest (appearance) and most well behaved to represent them as they want the organisation to appear successful and those representative children can make or break that image with one pick of the nose or unexpected swear word etc.

I think its far more likely that the children with the loudest, most annoying, pushiest parents are the ones that get to do this sort of thing. Or the ones with family members among the staff or governors.

'Twas ever thus.

Spendless

I'd put it to the back of my mind and not dwell on it, but i wouldn't forget either. These sort of things have a habit of coming back and making you inwardly smirk.

I posted recently about my kids Primary school unfairly punishing misbehaviour. The school has recently been ofsted inspected, myself and some other parents wrote our criticisms and Ofsted has largely found in favour of what we said. That's led to the HT announcing at a recent meeting with parents that 'the Ofsted report wasn't fair and neither were the comments' :rotfl::rotfl::rotfl: Sorely tempted to retort 'well, if you don't like it, you are welcome to go to another school' words HT has used to several parents about their kids!

meritaten

luxor4t wrote: »

There were always "golden children" (my friend's name for them) when our kids were in Primary ... and that was over 11 years ago. Some were clearly deserving - pleasant, well-mannered, hard-working & thoroughly likeable - others had qualities that were far harder to spot. Like real life, fairness didn't seem to apply.

Yep, my kids were at primary over twenty years ago and we called the 'golden kids' TEACHERS PETS! Believe it or not the same little madam (oops I mean child, PTA daughter) was picked to be Mary at the Nativity 4 years in a row!!!! The role of Joseph was alternated between another couple of boys whose parents (surprise, surprise) were on the PTA. The little mada.....girl was eventually passed over in favour of one of the NEW Governers daughters!

My daughter was a very bright articulate child - she usually got picked as Narrator (or Natterer as she called it) cos nothing fazed her! She was really funny actually, if Mary dropped baby Jesus, DD would just add it to her commentary! shepherd trips over, DD would say 'there goes another one'! The other parents loved her!
But she would have dearly loved to have been Mary, Just Once!

ALL the parents picked up on it - but head was unmoved!

Person_one

meritaten wrote: »

Yep, my kids were at primary over twenty years ago and we called the 'golden kids' TEACHERS PETS! Believe it or not the same little madam (oops I mean child, PTA daughter) was picked to be Mary at the Nativity 4 years in a row!!!! The role of Joseph was alternated between another couple of boys whose parents (surprise, surprise) were on the PTA. The little mada.....girl was eventually passed over in favour of one of the NEW Governers daughters!

My daughter was a very bright articulate child - she usually got picked as Narrator (or Natterer as she called it) cos nothing fazed her! She was really funny actually, if Mary dropped baby Jesus, DD would just add it to her commentary! shepherd trips over, DD would say 'there goes another one'! The other parents loved her!
But she would have dearly loved to have been Mary, Just Once!

ALL the parents picked up on it - but head was unmoved!

I was always narrator, its a much better role than Mary, all she gets to do is smile beatifically, how dull.

Emmarillo

This definitely goes on at my daughters school too. The same few children for everything and no exceptions. Like the OP I don't expect/want my child to be chosen for everything but the odd thing would be nice. Again like Op the chosen few seem to be the offspring of PTA/ Governor parents who call the head by his first name (loudly) in the playground, accompanied with air kissing :eek:

My eldest, overlooked for everything in Primary School because although she is incredibly polite, she's very quiet; is finding secondary school completely different.

meritaten

Person_one wrote: »

I was always narrator, its a much better role than Mary, all she gets to do is smile beatifically, how dull.

LMAO - Thats what I used to say to DD! but the little smart aleck always replied 'Yeah but her name is at the top of the Programme'! Theatre savvy - she wanted TOP BILLING!

Emmzi

ay my school it was the kids whose parents made the biggest donation to school library fund etc.