please delete.

raven83

............

**curlywurly**

Interesting question!
I personally believe that you can feel love for lots of people, but you can only be truly IN LOVE with one.
But I also know that how people define love can vary... hugely.

DUTR

How come it is ok if a woman does it, but not ok if a bloke does it?
As long as her partner is ok with it eg swinging /cuckold then fine.
But sounds like the Hubby is doing the practical bits (pumping up the tyres) whilst the lover has all the fun (riding the bike)
Still it is her life to do as she pleases, if she does get caught out, the hubby will be the main loser as she can hold access get the house etc etc

meritaten

she loves them both - but in different ways perhaps? perhaps on thier own they wouldnt fulfil her needs?
its a disaster about to happen I would think - but, she is an adult and its her life......so there is nowt you can (or should) do.

Bitsy_Beans

Is it love or lust? How much of it is centred around the physical aspects of a relationship. Does sound to me like the other man is the human equivalent of a drug, she will always need him in her life.

Personally I feel if she was that happily married she wouldn't need to indulge with a bit on the side.
Feel very sorry for her husband

jayII

DUTR wrote: »

How come it is ok if a woman does it, but not ok if a bloke does it?
As long as her partner is ok with it eg swinging /cuckold then fine.
But sounds like the Hubby is doing the practical bits (pumping up the tyres) whilst the lover has all the fun (riding the bike)
Still it is her life to do as she pleases, if she does get caught out, the hubby will be the main loser as she can hold access get the house etc etc

What makes you say that? It's not okay for anyone, male or female, to cheat on their partner unless the partner is okay with it.

I don't think anyone is saying it is okay. To quote from the OP: 'she says she knows its wrong...'

jayII

raven83 wrote: »

Long story, so keep it brief as possible.

Have a friend who is happily married to ( childhood sweetheart ) perfect family life 2 kids own home everything is as it great.....but....she sometimes indulges in having sex with someone else. Now she always claims that she loves her hubby and loves being a family but at the same time she says she has love for the other person and cant resist them even though she says she knows its wrong and that she will always need them in her life.

It got me wondering, can you really be in love with 2 people? I've always thought that if you truly truly love someone you coudnt do that but am i wrong? Is it possible?

Its really made me think.

I think it probably is possible, but that doesn't excuse what she is doing. At the end of the day she is a grown adult with the ability to say no. Her having feelings for both is not going to make the fallout any less painful for her husband and children when the **** hits the fan.

I'm far from perfect, but in my mind selfish and callous behaviour is still wrong, whatever the justification

cheepskate_2

while she is putting so much into the intemacy with her lover, she can never sort out her marraige, and probably doesnt want the hassle of trying as that need is filled. If hers was an open relationship then that would be fine as no one would be deceived and getting hurt

DUTR

jayII wrote: »

What makes you say that? It's not okay for anyone, male or female, to cheat on their partner unless the partner is okay with it.

I don't think anyone is saying it is okay. To quote from the OP: 'she says she knows its wrong...'

I'm sure along the thread someone will say it is ok
She/ we know it is wrong

but it is there twice in the 10 commandments

7 “You shall not commit adultery.

10 “You shall not covet your neighbor's house; you shall not covet your neighbor's wife, nor his male servant, nor his female servant, nor his ox, nor his donkey, nor anything that is your neighbor's.”

McKneff

Selfish cow, she has no forethought for the amount of pain and suffering she will cause the 'one she loves at home' when it comes out, and it always does.

Same with the fella,

And some friend dragging you into it too, when it all comes out theres going to be a cloud over you too.

TagEHeuer

That makes me feel sick thinking about this. How on earth I'd react if I found out my girlfriend was having a "strong deep connection" making love to another person. I feel very sorry for the husband.