Just lost my best pal

zaksmum

How are you today hun? Daft question I know...my heart goes out to you. Just saw your photo of Ben and I did a double take...he's the image of my old dog. I lost him when he was 13 and like you I was gutted. I couldn't even trust myself to go out because whenever anyone said how sorry they were, I was in floods of tears all over again.

The only thing that helped me was getting another dog. Not to replace the old boy - more as a sort of tribute to him. I got a lookalike, too, and I'm very happy to have him.

Maybe when you're feeling a bit stronger, it may help you to consider giving another dog the warm, loving home that Ben had. You gave him a wonderful life and may take some comfort from that.

And when you saw that he was suffering, you put your own pain aside to save him from further suffering - what more could you have done for him?

Big Hug For you

aliasojo

Someone once told me the measure of a good soul is the imprint they leave when they go. And it's just as true for animals as it is for humans.

You will always miss him. But one day it wont hurt quite so much. x

lozza1985

Only just started coming on the pet forum the last few days (even though I've been a member for ages....you'd think I would have found the pet section sooner!), but just wanted to offer you some {{{{{{{{{{hugs}}}}}}}}}}

rising_from_the_ashes

OK, not sure where to start with this one as all over the place.

Got home to a message from the vet that Ben's ashes were back ...... drove to the vet and managed to get inside in one piece. There was a guy waiting to take a pup in and a woman talking to the nurse about kitten food (which she's perfectly entitled to do).

Guy & pup get called into see the vet & by this point I'm struggling so am avidly reading the lost & found section & animals looking for homes (not a good idea but nothing else to read).

Anyway, eventually I have a seat while this woman whitters on about kitten food for .... 20 minutes.:( By this time, I'm really struggling to hold it together so when she eventually leaves and I have to speak to the nurse, I can't.

Anyway, she goes & gets Ben, I pay and leave and have made it home.

I've sat down and opened the delivery box that he's arrived in and ......... he's not in the casket I requested:(.

Honestly, I am so glad he's home and I know it may seem silly but I'm really upset.

He was supposed to be in a lovely carved casket which I thought would look OK in the living room and no-one would really know what it was:





and he's arrived in a plain wooden box (the dark one)




I guess I'll have to learn to live with it as there is no alternative (couldn't bear to open it and try to remove the ashes as some would be left behind) but I'm so upset as it's going to be really obvious what it is and certainly isn't as nice looking as the one I'd picked (which would've looked more like an ornament on the mantle piece).

Person_one

Could you put a little ornament/model of a dog that looks like Ben on top of the box?

That way its more like a plinth for a statue.

rising_from_the_ashes

Thanks .... I'm maybe over-reacting but it seems to have taken ages for him to come back and it was so hard to go and get him .... and I was expecting this lovely carved ornament type casket - maybe once I'm over the shock it won't seem so bad. I will have a hunt around and see if I can find something to go on the top.

sazzybum

Oh rising, I don't know what to say which would help you.

The most important thing is you have Ben back- and he'll always be with you-always. The other casket was beautiful, I've never saw one like that before, but honestly..it's like people..it's what inside that counts. It's Ben and he's home.

Oh God, I hope that doesn't sound as if I'm being unsympathetic, I'm honestly not-I have one of my old dogs in an urn which takes pride of place on the table, and while it's not aesthetically pleasing, it's her-which is all that matters to me. Please, please don't be offended by my comments.

But that stupid woman wittering on about kitten food! Read a leaflet Missus! That's what they're there for.

Tonight will be hard for you, but remember-you've got my number

Aileen
xxxx

Person_one

rising_from_the_ashes wrote: »

Thanks .... I'm maybe over-reacting but it seems to have taken ages for him to come back and it was so hard to go and get him .... and I was expecting this lovely carved ornament type casket - maybe once I'm over the shock it won't seem so bad. I will have a hunt around and see if I can find something to go on the top.

Of course you're not over-reacting. There's no right or wrong way to deal with this stuff and you never know what's going to hit you hardest.

Sazzy's right though, its still your Ben.

Edit, sorry I forgot to put 'not'!

Fridaycat

rising - I don't think you are over-reacting at all. But as sazzy says, he is home now and that is the most important thing.

Take lots of care xxxx

rising_from_the_ashes

Thank you Aileen, no you don't sound unsympathetic at all and I am honestly so glad he's home - I guess it was just a bit of a shock to be so different from what I was expecting. Have no idea where I'm going to put it as it's pretty huge!

To top it all - my heating isn't working...... thought I'd forgotten to switch on when I came in but have been & checked and it is on but all the radiators are freezing so I guess I'll have to go and try to find out what's wrong!

I was woken at 4am with something beeping (end of battery type beep) and it took me 3 hours to find what it was (by which time the carbon monoxide detector, smoke alarms, mobile, kindle, kitchen scales, cameras, meat thermometer etc are in pieces) .... so I'm probably overtired.