Is this really acceptable or am i over reacting? RANT WARNING!

*Louise*

Wow, I really hope you don't go into the school for a meeting about smething so trivial.

Few words in sons ear about that sort of thing not really being suitable for appearing in a recording should be enough. I can't help feeling sorry for him - he has come home from school having had a great day with a lesson that is a bit different than usual, told you all about it and then you've been annoyed at him for one small sentence when he obviously put so much effort into the rest of it.

I was always told 'choose your battles carefully', this one really isn't worth getting all het up over - it was a joke, it was a one off I don't think you need to be stressing over it

coolcait

squibbs25 wrote: »

...I rang my sister to see what my nephew had to say and he has no knowledge of the teacher saying anything in the last lesson.
I repeated to my ds what my nephew was saying while i was still on the phone, ds said that it was mentioned a few lessons ago when they were doing the planning, nephew then kind of remembered on of the kids on his table saying about being the P king (but it wasnt my ds as he sits on a different table).
Anyway none of the other kids mention it in their videos (just my ds :mad:)
...I will phone the school tomorrow and try and get a meeting with the English teacher and the head of English as i want to get to the bottom as to whether the teacher was commenting on what the other child had said or if it was the teachers idea and the other child was indeed reacting to that.
My ds has stated that at no time did he hear the other child in the class mention anything - he definately heard the teacher.
My nephew has said the teached definately commented on it.

...

I think you're over-reacting.

I've cut a lot of your post, but the two bits I've put in bold above contradict each other. I 'hear' your telephone conversation going like this:

You (to sister): OMG, you won't believe what DS did in English class [fill her in], what did nephew make of the teacher telling them they could do that?!

Nephew: What? I don't remember the teacher saying that!!

You (to DS, while you're still on the phone): Your cousin says the teacher said no such thing!!! I didn't think a teacher would say something like that! What do you have to say now?!

DS: It was mentioned a few lessons ago when we were doing the planning.

Nephew: (having heard/been told the above): Oh, yeah. I kind of remember that maybe another kid on our table sort of said something maybe about being the !!!!!! king. Or something. What my cousin said anyway.

You: Well DS says that he didn't hear anyone else mention it - apart from the teacher!!

Nephew: Oh yes, I definitely heard the teacher say it!

It is often said that anonymous people on the internet will say things that they wouldn't say in real life.

The converse of that might be that, if you're a young lad, and your auntie is talking to/at you in the way the OP comes across, then it's very easy to see how you can go from 'I didn't hear the teacher say that' to 'Oh yes, the teacher definitely said it'.

Have you seen all of the videos? Unless you have, this comment - "Anyway none of the other kids mention it in their videos (just my ds)" - is just another example of how you are basing things on what you have been told by your son, and other children of his age.

Normally I would suggest speaking to the teacher. In this case, I would recommend taking a step back from your outrage, and consider the positives from your son's performance (as reported by him).

MarilynMonroe_2

I would not make a big deal out of it. It might knock his confidence.
You will laugh at this when he's older and he's got kids himself ... 'remember when you were a 13 yr old !!!!!! king?....' x

Spirit_2

Another who thinks you are over reacting. His actions were attention seeking, and sorry to say it, so are your proposals to make an unnecessary mountain out of a mole hill in contacting the school.

I think your reaction worse, as you are an adult. You have expressed your disapproval , no harm has been done, the video will soon be forgotten, can you just let it go now?

You can bring it up again when he graduates with a boring degree or qualifies as an accountant.

CH27

You're over reacting.
I'd actually be proud that my son had used his imagination to come up with a multi dimensional charctar.

Encourage him to think, imagine & explore.
Don't knock him down.

shellsuit

You're over reacting. You may think what he said wasn't funny, but I bet his classmates thought it was hysterical!

He didn't get into trouble over it with school, so I do think you're making a mountain out of a mole hill.

January20

Your kid does his homework and by the sounds of it, is motivated. He is imaginative and listens to the teacher (more than his cousin it seems). And you can only think about complaining about the !!!!!! king thing? I think the problem is that you are embarrassed about what the teacher might think of you as a parent because your boy seems to know what a !!!!!! king is. Fact is the teacher has probably heard a lot worse than that and is a lot wiser than you about what 13-14 yo boys know/ get up to. You are over-reacting.

georgiesmum

Sounds a brilliant kid with a lot of imagination. You should be proud of him. Don't make him feel small or dirty over this or it could be the last time he talks to you about anything controversial. And well done that teacher for making the class interesting. !!!!!! stars and prostitutes do exist you know. can't hide that from intelligent kids

dirtysexymonkey

op youre massively overreacting. if you want your son to never tell you anything and not want to speak to you then youre going the right way about it.

Seanymph

I had girls, and now have a 15 year old step son. They are a totally different breed.

They also have the need to blend, in the same way that girls do - but there is an added dimension to boys where they need to stand out enough, be seen to push boundaries enough, be quick enough at 'banter' and smart enough with ripostes that they get alpha standing without having to battle.

What they are judged on is different.

Your son is doing exactly what he needs to do to garner respect, whilst achieving passing grades. He is articulate, imaginative, clever, but close enough to the boundary that his classmates will hold him in awe and the teacher will smile and understand how very clever he's being.

Phoning your sister was daft - calling the school would be ridiculous and very very silly indeed.

You have a choice now of being one of the mums who is dismissed by not just your sons mates, but your son - as having no opinion worth listening because you have no understanding and such outdated views - or of learning what HIS world is like and fitting into that one. Take your choice.

As a parent I wanted to know what my kids were doing, and that involved a lot of not judging, but gentle steering - always easier to influence the direction of a car you are actually IN I find - I worked hard at staying onboard.

Embarrassing them, making a big fuss at school without a damned good cause - not getting the pressures they are under to conform whilst standing out acceptablly.......... they are all not good parental things to do.

Stop phoning your sister every time you think the teachers think badly of you - the teachers couldn't care less about you - they know your son as a person, they have a relationship with him and they know he is old enough that he is now making his own choices.

Save your embarrassment for the first time he gets falling down drunk at a mates house, or you log onto facebook where he is your friend and whilst he is upstairs apparently sleeping because he's off sick somehow he's managed to 'like' red tube and !!!!!! hub.......

He's passing exams, he's bright, articulate, and well liked. He produced an amazing piece of work there - the girls will vote for the limb saving doctor and the boys for the !!!!!! content........... he did the assignment, that's what he was focussed on, not your sensibilities.