Bought clothes for toddler niece but she never wore them

Valli

MarilynMonroe wrote: »

Just one question - you say SIl and her partner - I am racking my brains here, would that not be your brother? (or sister even)

My guess it's the OPs husband's (or partners) sister so the OP has no family (blood) ties to either of them. Hence the difficulty.

OP Could your husband (assuming I am right) not ask his sister if the gift was appreciated (subtly, of course;))

Another option would be if you are thinking of buying again (eg for xmas) why not send her a link to a few clothes on the web, from different sites, eg Next, Boden, Tesco etc and ask which she'd prefer?

Nicki

MarilynMonroe wrote: »

Just one question - you say SIl and her partner - i am rackingmy brains here, would that not be your brother? (or sister even)

Why? Her husband's sister is also her SIL but doesn't have to be married to one of OP's relatives

I'm a bit stunned by how aggressive blue monkey has been to the OP. For the life of me I can't see what she has done wrong by buying expensive clothes for her niece. I don't have any nieces or nephews but I do have children and a very generous sister who has bought some beautiful clothes for my children. Often she spends far more than I would, knowing as a mum that its not worth paying over the odds in the early years, but her stuff still gets worn and appreciated. It reflects more on the recipient than the donor I think if they feel slighted by being given an expensive item of clothing for their child.

purple.sarah

MarilynMonroe wrote: »

Just one question - you say SIl and her partner - i am rackingmy brains here, would that not be your brother? (or sister even)

OP's SIL could also be her partner's sister.

mrs_marty

I think what you are doing is lovely, and if anyone asks me for birthdays and Christmas for my 3 I always favour clothes. In fact it is a standard joke with myself and SIL about Christmas Pj's

IF your SIL has sold them then be flattered in a kind of way; you have boosted there income and for that you HAVE benefited your niece. So you have a couple of choices keep buying the clothes from expensive shops with the hope that in some long road for a short cut way you are helping the family OR like others have suggested buy in lower branded clothes which have no high resale value which the child will wear.

Which lower branded by ways of money are in fact just as good. I would love to buy my youngest all Boden, Next, Debenhams etc however I have reduced down my hours to PT to give us a better quality of family life and so to coin a phrase have learnt to cut my cloth accordingly, and much to my joyful discovery the lower perceived brands are fab!

I would still give clothes as they will be appreciated by mum but go get 3 x more for your money at Tesco's, Matalan etc Maybe even run it past mum that this is your thought what is the little girl needing?

MarilynMonroe_2

LOl thanks for the explanation, i suffer from mummy brain/senior moments and I am blonde!

System

I haven't read all the way through, but from my own experience ( but with a boy) I was given some clothes, second hand but unworn and good quality and my son didn't ever wear them... when they were the 'right size' he didn't go anywhere that warranted wearing really nice clothes, and by the time he did go somewhere where they would have been suitable he'd outgrown them! Slightly different with a girl and dresses maybe but maybe cheap clothes for her daughter that she doesn't have to worry about getting 'spoilt' suit your SIL best?

I looked at Boden clothes when my son was small...but would never have been able to 'force' myself to pay that much for something he would grow out of quickly. That was probably also because I wasn't brought up with lots of money...I had nice clothes but the weren't expensive ones, even now I flinch at the prices and think "I'd never spend THAT on a dress" lol. Do you think that may be true of your SIL?

There is also the possibility that your SIL really likes to buy her daughters clothes herself... mums like to be able to buy the 'pretties' as well as the boring day to day stuff?

Valli

MarilynMonroe wrote: »

LOl thanks for the explanation, i suffer from mummy brain/senior moments and I am blonde!

Well we KNOW that Miss Monroe

MarilynMonroe_2

Valli wrote: »

Well we KNOW that Miss Monroe

boo boo bee doo :rotfl:

Millie2008_2

Personally, I would have loved my child(ren), assuming we have them, to have such a kind aunt as you- but being as we are both only children, that will never happen

I agree with some of the above and as people have said, it may be that the clothes didn't fit, or that they were valued "too much" and set aside for best, but the thought of them getting covered in snot and chocolate was too much (lesson there for me as I tend not to use things that I value too much, which is daft really)

Buuut (and feel free to shoot me down here, but no offence meant) is it possible that there is more to this? In that there has been a time in the past when something else has been given by you and rejected by the recipient? And this has made you a bit sensitive to the response to your giving gifts? Or something else going on that is causing you to feel a bit sensitive to it (you don't have to answer here xx)

Either way, you sound like a very kind person, so please don't beat yourself up xx

POPPYOSCAR

I have to admit that several years later, I still have somewhere, unworn clothes bought for my children that were so nice that I saved them for best, and they just outgrew them before they could wear them!!