My situation .. What can I do?

DUTR

Dave101t wrote: »

this is why i keep it in my pants at all times.

Life's too short to keep it in your pants,

crazy_gooner

DUTR wrote: »

You may have to just sit and wait, 19yrs is a long time
CS is always paid in arrears, I paid yesterday and am already in arrears

So basically, if she contacts them in a year time, I will have a year arrears? and not starting from the day she contacts them?

If so that's a seriously flawed system, I know it is to most anyway.

I don't want arrears, I'd rather start paying now so my mind is kind of clear for the future and no unexpected debts lie on my door step.

If I were to give them all my details, tell them the situation and I do not know if I'm the dad, the girl is refusing a DNA, and say I do not know the girls details, what can they do?

clearingout

Your liability to pay will only start on the day she contacts them. They will then contact you and it is during that first phone call that you need to question paternity and ask for a DNA test,stating you are not on the birth certificate and that you have reason to at least doubt you may be the father. You MUST do it on first contact or you will struggle to get the test. She will then have to consent to having the test if she wants the case to go any further. If she won't consent, she gets no money.

clearingout

additional word of caution with dNA testing - there are a lot of companies out there that do testing, but not all of these companies will give you a 99.9% result and not all of these companies are approved for CSA and court purposes. In other words, you need to do homework if you are doing a test privately. The CSA use Cellmark - but I believe their testing through the CSA is about half of what it is if done privately so you may be sensible to wait if money is an issue.

DUTR

crazy_gooner wrote: »

So basically, if she contacts them in a year time, I will have a year arrears? and not starting from the day she contacts them?

If so that's a seriously flawed system, I know it is to most anyway.

I don't want arrears, I'd rather start paying now so my mind is kind of clear for the future and no unexpected debts lie on my door step.

If I were to give them all my details, tell them the situation and I do not know if I'm the dad, the girl is refusing a DNA, and say I do not know the girls details, what can they do?

NO No NO, the arrears only accrue when a case is opened, what I am saying earlier is that CS is always paid in arrears not in advance.
You say you do not know the girl's detailos, yet you have the phone number fo her parents and at least on speaking term

Mojisola

crazy_gooner wrote: »

Thanks guys. just puts me into a Dilemma now of what to do, sit and wait or not. I wont pay all of the DNA test, if they're sure I am the dad they should pay half in my opinion.

I just don't want arrears!

Thanks!

If you don't want to let arrears build up, don't want to pay for a dna test or the mother won't take the child to be sampled, could you start putting 15% of your income away in savings? If a demand came out of the blue, you'd have the money. If it never happens, you'll have built up a nest-egg that you can use as you wish.

Mojisola

DUTR wrote: »

He can open a case himself :j

I don't think he wants to open a case. Can't he just find out if a case has been opened naming him as the father?

DUTR

Mojisola wrote: »

I don't think he wants to open a case. Can't he just find out if a case has been opened naming him as the father?

It would be difficult for him to find out unless he asked the PWC .

pinkpig08

Your liability won't start until the day the CSA contact YOU - not the date the mother contacts THEM. If you have had no correspondence from the CSA yet, then up to now you owe nothing.

As for the DNA test, I would say it's not up to her parents to fund half of it - they weren't there!

Mojisola

pinkpig08 wrote: »

Your liability won't start until the day the CSA contact YOU - not the date the mother contacts THEM. If you have had no correspondence from the CSA yet, then up to now you owe nothing.

This is the bit that would worry me. As I said earlier, there have been threads on here where the CSA letter was sent to the wrong address and, because the father didn't respond, liability was assumed and arrears started to build up. It took long and expensive battles with the CSA to prove that the man had never lived at that address and so could never have received the initial letter.