Real Life MMD: Should the cash go to my kids or pay off debt?

Kyser_Soze

Pay the debt. In what way is maintaining a financially stable environment not 'spending the money on the kids'?

A.Jones

Use the money to pay the debt off BUT let the kids and the dad know that HE has paid for the shoes, the glasses, etc. I will feel confident that the money is going on the kids and the kids will know that their dad is paying towards their keep.

Jue66_2

Hi, dont feel guilty about spending the money to pay the credit card bill. It was used to pay for the stuff for your children. The children will benefit in the long run a you wont be stressing about paying the credit card bill and if the maintenance continues to be received you can then use it for or give it directly to the children. I use my maintenance for whatever we need as a family, as the children get more or less what they ask for anyway.
Hope this helps, but never ever feel guilty. Your ex should for the delay in payment.

FattyBettyBoo

It seems a bit of a pointless question to me. People don't have seperate 'pots' of money, they have a pool. The kids are always going to need stuff and the money to pay for the stuff is always going to come from this 'pool'. So what if you pay off the CC now and buy the kid's stuff with other money later - its just a bit of a loan. Always pay off the most expensive debt first!

moorhen_2

Pay off the debt. You & the kids will be better off in the long run for sure.

sutters

Can't understand why some people think it belongs to the children. No money belongs to children unless they earn it themselves or inherit it. They are living with you and you are fully supporting them. All the money is in the same "pot" so it will benefit them anyway and you will be less stressed if you pay off your debt and will be a better mother.:)

Un0riginal

I don't normally reply to these, but there seems to be a lot of numpties posting on here at the moment.

Money is money. Does this mean that the kids are going to be neglected and starve? Of course not, the OP has quite clearly stated that due to maintenance not being paid she did not have enough money to buy these things and so ended up getting into debt to pay for them. Things are always going to come up that need paying for, the only way to do a budget properly is to tot up all your incomings (it doesn't matter what their source is, money IS money, not some arbitrary label, we are not raising institutions we are raising families) and outgoings and then plan as to how everything is going to get paid. Any money left over from this should either be saved or used to clear existing debts (all dependant on circumstances and of course have a read of http://www.moneysavingexpert.com/savings/pay-off-debts).

OP, don't feel guilty or upset at the numpties on here. I am quite amazed that they have somehow managed to figure out how to use a computer, sign up to a forum and even make a post, one does have to wonder if after all that they still only manage to surface in an attempt to further their own negativity. Your financial stability is part and parcel of providing a good environment for your kids. Not only that, if you involve them in some of the budget planning you will also help them to understand financial responsibility and the value of money. I wish you all the best and hope you are able to get everything under control.

swmbo60

Yes use the money your children's father has at last given. You have presumable been using your own in the absence of his support (how do these men think their children get fed and clothed - and I appreciate the same can be said for absent mothers), so use the money towards becoming debt free it all benefits your children. Once you are solvent all monies given by their father can go towards the children.

Aldahbra

I can't see the delima here.

Budget and pay off the debts as soon as you can.

It might be a good idea to tell the children what you spent the money on that got you into debt so they can tell your ex that it went towards buying these shoes, etc.

interlcore

Pay off the debts. To pay for things for your kids, you had to go into debt. Long term, it is best to get rid of any debt asap otherwise interest will eat into whatever money you earn thus the children having less money spent on them from future pay.
It is very unfortunate that you had to use a credit card and I hope you will never have to again - I hope their father stops being a tight wad.