Should I "out" my SIL's eating disorder?

mildred1978 · 19 September 2011 at 5:57PM

Lipbalm wrote: »

Sorry OP, but it is you that comes off bad here. Eating Disorders are a mental illness, one that guess what both affects your physical and mental health and despising "fatness" and expressing it is quite usual. You on the other hand remind me of someone who would out a homosexual person just to betray or make fun of them in front of their peers making them feel shamed an guilty, you obviously do not like her and do not want to help her so remove her from your facebook friends list and leave her alone you horrid, unsympathetic woman.

Not at all :rotfl: Many of my best friends are gay! And they're lovely.

This girl is downright nasty. Gloating about the discomfort of someone with physical disabilities because she was preening in a mirror ranks her as the lowest of the low in my eyes. I don't care how 'ill' she is. It's unacceptable behaviour and I'm not usually someone who just puts up with it. I was just going to ask her if she thinks these 'witticisms' up while her head is down the loo, that's all.

Other family members find her hard to handle because she's so intolerant, but they keep their mouths shut.

Lipbalm_2 · 19 September 2011 at 6:00PM

mildred1978 wrote: »

Not at all :rotfl: Many of my best friends are gay! And they're lovely.

This girl is downright nasty. Gloating about the discomfort of someone with physical disabilities because she was preening in a mirror ranks her as the lowest of the low in my eyes. I don't care how 'ill' she is. It's unacceptable behaviour and I'm not usually someone who just puts up with it. I was just going to ask her if she thinks these 'witticisms' up while her head is down the loo, that's all.

Other family members find her hard to handle because she's so intolerant, but they keep their mouths shut.

All of that behaviour could be down to her poor mental health and she may seem like the most nasty person to others who don't fully understand the extent of her illness. Aggrivating the situation for your own selfish benefit is not a nice thing to do.

mildred1978 · 19 September 2011 at 6:02PM

Lipbalm wrote: »

Yeah cause Eating Disorders are a barrel of laughs.

They're not an excuse to be a horrible human being.

Lipbalm_2 · 19 September 2011 at 6:03PM

Sorry you are infuriating me, read up on some a.s level psychology or something basic seeing as you are behaving as a child.

puddy · 19 September 2011 at 6:05PM

LMCD wrote: »

Hey.... its not facebook thats the problem - it is the internet - where the bravado/careless attitude by many is carried out...

OP if you want to help talk to her - other than that ignore her comments off your feed, I have done that with people on mine and they are not being nasty - just writing stuff that I cannot tolerate to read... but its obvious there are insecurities so don't allow them to consume you aswell.

i disagree, there is some implicit pressure by society about 'social networking sites' of which facebook is the biggest. if you're not on it, you're some sort of non entity. thats very different to using particular forums to seek advice or talk about like minded issues

its like the thing with mobile phones, it is expected that everyone own one, theres something strange about you if you dont own one or if you do, if you dont pick it up every time it rings, beit on the loo, holiday, out with a friend whatever

mildred1978 · 19 September 2011 at 6:06PM

Lipbalm wrote: »

Sorry you are infuriating me, read up on some a.s level psychology or something basic seeing as you are behaving as a child.

Do feel free to go elsewhere then :wave:

puddy · 19 September 2011 at 6:07PM

mildred1978 wrote: »

Because it's the only way the family connect with each other. They don't bother with visiting or phoning, or even e-mailing, so pictures of the kids etc go on FB for everyone. It's not how my family works, so it's a bit odd, but it's the way they operate.

so why dont you put pictures in the post of the kids? whats stopping you phoning them?

mildred1978 · 19 September 2011 at 6:10PM

puddy wrote: »

so why dont you put pictures in the post of the kids? whats stopping you phoning them?

We do phone them. They might manage a minute on the phone.

If they made a little more effort, I might feel inclined to send them physical pictures.

LMCD · 19 September 2011 at 6:13PM

puddy wrote: »

i disagree, there is some implicit pressure by society about 'social networking sites' of which facebook is the biggest. if you're not on it, you're some sort of non entity. thats very different to using particular forums to seek advice or talk about like minded issues

its like the thing with mobile phones, it is expected that everyone own one, theres something strange about you if you dont own one or if you do, if you dont pick it up every time it rings, beit on the loo, holiday, out with a friend whatever

Fair enough you disagree - but as to your implicit pressure - I personally can't see that happening, I have never seen this first hand myself though there are plenty of people I know who have facebook and mobiles and use neither and thats just how it rolls for folks I accept that.

I guess it may be 'society' is something going on around me which I am a bit ignorant to/don't bother with.

System · 19 September 2011 at 6:15PM

I'd go as far as tell her that you find her opinions offensive, then hide all future updates. Yes it is a mental illness and she quite obviously needs help (which she's only going to get if she can herself accept she is ill) but at the same time its no excuse for being so offensive (..and i do have a mental illness)