My son fell over...

Gavin83

I'm a youngish male (25) and I would think twice before helping a child depending on the circumstances. I think if a child hurt themselves I'd help, especially being a trained first aider. When I was out running a few weeks ago a kid of about 8 or so fell off his scooter. I asked him if he was ok and needed any help but he was fine so no harm done.

However I think a lost child is a different story. If I saw a child lost I wouldn't help. Seeing as they aren't in immediate danger and the fact I'd have to stand with them and potentially hold their hand I don't think it's worth the risk of being branded a child abuser and possibly attacked. It's sad that's the impression society has created and I wish it was different but that's the way it is in the UK at the moment.

mikey72

I think this site has been very quick to cry wolf, and a lot of threads on here soon decend into the "sexual abuser" and "grooming" theme.
I wouldn't ever walk or drive past but I have to be honest, I would have to think twice on what to do, and would be far more inclined now to phone an ambulance, instead of offering a lift myself, in case I meet a lynch mob of screaming mothers.

jacqhale

From the other side, I once stopped when 2 boys were in the road with their bikes, one of them had fallen off and cut his arm. To someone happening upon us it looked as if I had knocked them over yet 2 cars drove around us the wrong way round a roundabout to get past!

The boys were clearly shaken and hurt so I offered them a lift, but then changed to walking them home as I didn't want to put them in an uncomfortable situation. They were lovely boys but we saw one of their parents driving down the road and they did not stop to see what was going on or why they were with a stranger. When we got back to the injured boy's house the mother screamed at him, ignored me and then slammed the gate with a quick 'thanks'
To say I was stunned by their behaviour was an understatement!

The other boy walked back with me with his bike until I was safely at my car, chatting the whole way, said thank you again and cheerily waved as he rode off. I always think they were such lovely boys against all the odds of some awful parents.

I would stop again and hope that if my children were lost or hurt someone would take care of them in the best way possible.

borokat

I would always offer to help to someone, the only time I would think twice is if they were being attacked, in which case I would phone for help.
I have been involved in helping an old lady who fell over, but left as there were several people involved - as a group we phoned for help, brought her a chair, a cup of tea, and phoned her relatives! I have also helped another old lady who fell and cut her head and offered to phone a doctor or a relative but she refused any help so there wasn't anything I could do. She was lucid so I had to leave it. Have also phoned the police when saw a man collapsed/having a sleep in the road (he was drugged up so thought it best to keep distance and let the police assess him).
With children, I would take them to the lost children point if in a big public place, get an announcement over the tannoy, if not I would just wait with them and make sure they were ok. I couldn't live with myself if I ignored them and they came to harm. Plenty of times I have been about to go over and then realised the parent was nearby but in truth not doing a great job of keeping their eyes on their little one.
I've been on the receiving end I was assualted in the street aged 15, when it was over I was in tears and really frightened and nobody came to help.

thistledome

halibut2209 wrote: »

Sorry, but this is an issue which really really winds me up. There has been NO increase in the number of child abductions/attacks in the last countless years. And the vast majority of attacks are by family members. The chance of a child abduction by a stranger is pathetically small and no different than it was 10, 20, 50, or 100 years ago.

And then there's the one that started it all off

Sarah Payne - This is probably the only one in the last 20 years where it's a case of a stranger taking a child.

I apologise if I come off as "making light" of the tragedies above, but my point is only one of the cases of child abduction/murder etc in the last 20 years is a stranger.

Can you provide a reliable source for your claim that only 1 child has been abducted and killed by a stranger in the last 20 years? Also, why does the criteria have to include murder? What about abductions/sexual assaults that don't end in murder? Still only 1?

And why the arbitrary cut off point of 20 years? Is there a reason for not including the 1990's or '80's? I seem to remember quite a few cases from them, but I suppose they don't count either.

Although the risk of "stranger danger" is much smaller than most people think, there's definitely been more than 1 in the last 20 years.

I agree with the poster who said it's about area. Round here people will always help someone who's in trouble, and they'll go out of their way to do it. It's considered normal, as it was in England in the not so distant past. I remember falling off my bike as a kid and a nice man picked me up and even replaced the bottle of lemonade I had in a bag hanging off the handlebars which had smashed.

The problem with England nowadays is that nobody gives a toss about anyone else. It's all me me me and sod everybody else. Some will be afraid of being called a child molester, but most just don't care IMO. This happened in the 80's and I'm glad I left as it's got worse ever since.

England is getting like New York, where people will step over an injured person or walk around them and not even glance back.

Bexm

You've hit a nerve with me here!

Never mind just helping children if they fall or anything what about adults, I've previously rushed to the other side of a car park because a saw a lady fall flat on her face just to check she was ok!

I don't get the mentality of people, I grew up in a rural area where people would always be more than willing to help and and make sure people were ok, this was bred into me! This is what you should do... but then I moved to the home counties and the amount of times I've seen mum's struggling up steps with prams or people on crutches trying to get up the steps from a tube station with a big bag and everyone just pushing past them and not even giving them a second glance! :mad:

Makes me want to yell "can't you see this person needs some help!" as I'm offering to grab the other end of the pram or help with bags! GRRRRR!

DS4215

thistledome wrote: »

And why the arbitrary cut off point of 20 years? Is there a reason for not including the 1990's or '80's? I seem to remember quite a few cases from them, but I suppose they don't count either.
.

The 1990s were within the last 20 years, but you are correct with the likes of Millie Dowler and others that we have forgotten make it more than one. But it happened well into the past too - look up the story of Sweet Fanny Adams, but not while you are eating.

About 4 years ago I was out for a lunchtime jog and was just going over the tram tracks when I passed a young boy (3-4yo) by himself. Nobody was around and I didn't have a mobile so I ended up walking with him for so far (he was walking with a purpose) and then he just burst into tears. I got him into a nearby factory and they rang the police and he was quickly reunited with his dad (who did thank me!).

Turns out he had wandered off from a shopping centre and his parents had the police out with helicopters by the time I'd found him. Sometimes you have to help out, but it would have been so easy not to get involved.

skea56

Its not just a problem in England, see this article:
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-northern-ireland-14808141

sk56

halibut2209

I forgot about Millie Dowler. I thought there was another one, thanks for reminding me

"What about abductions/sexual assaults that don't end in murder?"

Such as?

warehouse

Where on earth did the child being bullied at school thread go?