Would you ask your son to leave home?

Bennifred

:j:jYay!:j:j

Bumpmakesfour

Great news! :j X

mountainofdebt

KxMx wrote: »

Hope the job works out. But I foresee more battles ahead when you ask "keep" money from him.

Oh come on - I doubt Victory would ask her son for 'keep' money given everything she has posted on her......I'm forseeing her son deciding that the latest gadget isn't worth having if he has to put his hand in his pocket, if my experience of Junior is anything to go by.

We've asked Junior for £20 per week housekeeping since he left the 6th form but that's only because he has decided to take a year out and that was one of the conditions of us supporting him during this year. No I don't feel that he's hard done by - and in fact people have been asking us when we were going to start charging him rent. Although I would love to be able to save it and surprise him with it, I don't think that the family budget will allow it.

Victory the one word of advice I would give you is don't tell your son how to spend his wages - he might spend it on, what in your eyes is crap, but he needs to learn the lessons that only experience can teach us.

onlyroz

I personally wouldn't ask for "keep" until my kids were in full-time employment (as opposed to being at school/college/uni - if they were on JSA then I'd ask for a cut). However, if they were earning a decent amount in a part-time job I'd expect them to buy their own clothes and pay for their own entertainment.

tori.k

jellyhead wrote: »

By the way, I'm shocked to see some comments in this thread about teenagers being given their child benefit as pocket money. Someone even said he'll see it doesn't go far and will then get a job!

I think £80 per month is a massive amount to give to a teenager! Mine gets nowhere near half that, and never will!

It must be tricky for teens if they have parents like me yet they see their mates getting £30 every week in EMA to fritter away ...

Congrats on the Job news Victory :j

That was me that hands over the Child benefit Jellyhead my son is 16 it's not pocket money as i see him as young adult not a child, he lives with us and i feed him but thats it, the goverment gives me child benefit to help support his needs, he's learning to support his own needs. It's true that he probably has more disposible income then i do at the moment as he has a small part-time job aswell, but then if he wants driving lessons next year he knows that he has to start saving now to be able to afford them. he will fall on his backside at somepoint when something he needs clashes with something he wants, but most of us learn the hard way.
We are hoping that him taking responsibility of himself now while at home, will with luck get him into good habits before all sorts of offer's of credit become availible in a couple of years

property.advert

It isn't the same as decades ago when you could move out and the social would pick up the tab. I'd think about a shared house, as many young people do, myself included. Be prepared to pay the deposit and advance rent but before that, he'd have to have some means of paying the rent going forward.

He needs to get out really unless he can get down to study. Perhaps he needs that making perfectly clear to him, the ungrateful sod.

victory

Thanks everyone he is chuffed yes:D even more chuffed because he does not work wednesdays which is football night and does not work friday and saturdays which are loads of 18th friends party nights, he does work 1pm-10pm on a sunday so all in all result:D

I have told him to keep his eyes and ears open(like his gf work job coming up in 2 weeks) just incase it is better hours/more money etc and he says yes.

No, not taking rent off him no, no will not tell him how to spend his money but was thinking as a lesson could contribute some money towards his phone for his 18th and he has to put the rest and when he realises how hard he has to work and how many hours to get the cost of the phone he might realise it is just not worth it:D

Gillyx

Really pleased for him Victory You may find this is a start of a better time for you all.

victory

:DI do hope so because now it may not be so centred around money, the lack of it and what he can't have, his money is his now to do as he pleases, he does not get paid for a month so he can then work out what he feels it should be spent on, at least he will feel a bit more like all his friends, that he can join in more and go about more, I reckon though once he realises how hard it is to earn on minimum wage he won't want to throw it about and will want to know where it is all going:D

lurvlyloz

ask him to pay you in chinese food haha x