Real Life MMD: Should my brother get his share of Mum's will?

Former_MSE_Lee Posts: 343 Forumite
edited 13 September 2011 at 4:04PM in MoneySaving polls
Money Moral Dilemma: Should my brother get his share of Mum's will?

My mother has written a will leaving everything equally to her 8 children. Two years ago my brother asked her for a £5,000 loan for a car, promising to pay it back when he could. Mum was taken aback, but wrote a cheque. Since then, he and his wife have had various holidays and bought three expensive dogs – but not repaid a penny of the loan. Mum "doesn't like to ask him about it", but I know it bothers her. It also doesn't seem fair that, when Mum has gone, my brother will get his share of her money, but will also have had a £5,000 bonus on top.
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  • gettiton
    greed van be a funny thing... but which of you is the greedy one?
  • Petaldust
    gettiton wrote: »
    greed van be a funny thing... but which of you is the greedy one?

    Nothing greedy about wanting to be treated equally to your sibling. Sounds like you're lucky enough never to have been in a similar position.
  • SukiMay
    What happens to your Mother's money after she dies is not up to you. If she chooses not to alter her will to reflect the £5,000 she lent your brother, you will just have to accept it.

    You just have to trust that Karma will get your brother at some point down the line...
  • scotsbob
    scotsbob Posts: 4,632 Forumite
    This has nothing to do with the will. It's about an unpaid loan and that is between your mum and your brother, no concern of yours.
  • FelinePrincess
    Agree, the 5k loan is between brother and mother, and it's up to the mother what she decides to so.

    The question asker shouldn't even be concerning themselves with this matter as it's nothing to do with them. I think something isn't right when someone is questioning a will before the parent is even dead!
  • purple.sarah
    I'd encourage her and him to sort it out now while she's still here, not worry about the will. If she is in sound mind and chose to lend him the money and leave him more money then that is up to her, there's nothing you can do about it.
  • jax1305
    tell you what doesn't sound right to me - poor woman isn't even dead yet and you're already getting uptight about who gets what. perhaps spend some time while she's still here enjoying her company - then when she's gone you've got all the lovely memories that no amount of money can buy.
  • The doctrine of collation may apply, unless it has been expressly disregarded in the Will. This is a legal doctrine which states that items given during life, eg. cash loans, and sometimes even non cash items like shares, property etc. will be totalled up and subtracted from the total legacy due to your brother when your mother passes away. As long as the rest of your siblings agree to this then it should be quite straight forward. However, this is obviously a legal issue, and therefore it would be worth seeking advice from the solicitor who will be dealing with your mother's estate as and when it arises. The best situation would be for your mother to get your brother to pay back the loan now, to avoid any family disagreements further down the line.
  • eurovision_fan
    :idea: If the son has the ability to go on expensive holidays and buy costly pooches than he's perfectly able to pay back the loan from "The Bank of Mum and Dad"

    Whether the son can pay by "payments in kind" that should be decided between the Mum, the offending son and the rest of the family.
    If the family unit by majority voting :grouphug: decide on "Payments in Kind" then if we say he does jobs at 20% on top of National Minimum Wage (use October's figure of £6.08 p/h) that would work out as around £7.20 per hour of work.
    £5,000 / £7.20 = 694.445 hours :dance: of service he must pay back before she passes on.:A

    If he doesn't pay the Mum back then the £5,000 should be docked from his inheritence and shared equally with the other 7 siblings.

    [I was thinking of doing a similar sort of thing when my parents die as im the main executor of both (despite being the youngest sibling - aint it brilliant to be smart one as the youngest!) :whistle: ]
    Long time MSE member… just sitting in silence in the background. Make money on the move. Join me and thousands of others.Sign-up to Skedadle with my referral code: referral perk - I get 50p in my balance when you earn £1)
  • janiebquick
    Shame on you! Your poor mother has been a responsible person and has made her will. She can change it any time. Yet you are talking as if she is dead already!

    As for the loan - that's between your brother and your mother. It's none of your business!
    'Never argue with an idiot. They will only bring you down to their level and beat you with experience.' George Carlin
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