Splitting the family at Xmas?

bride2be2012

this thread has me all excited about Christmas already! So much I've just gone and booked my days off work for the holidays!:j

This Christmas will be the first me and my fiance have in our own house, so we will be spending it alone, just us and the dog, and I can't wait! Boxing Day we will prob visit my folks as they stay about 15 mins away. In reality, we'll be there an hour, then me and my mum will hit the sales!

First year we were together, we spent it at my parents. 2nd year was at his parents, but they were invited to one of his brothers, so really we spent most of the day alone which was great! It's not that I don't get on with his folks, it's just we love having Xmas as a chilled out day and his mum always want to play cards, or board games or talks over whatever film we are watching!!

Last year, we were living with my folks, so we spent it there. We were invited to his folks on Boxing Day, but they stay 2.5 hours away and OH was working the 27th so we didn't go (and were made to feel vvv guilty about it).

Haven't told anyone yet that we are staying home alone, my folks will be fine with it, his mum will prob go in a mood coz she'll see it as our 'turn' for going there. But tough. We want our 1st Xmas in our 1st house together!!

candygirl

I've been with OH for just over a year, and we spent last Xmas day at his parents who live 80 miles away.This year i've told him it's my family's time, so we are staying here and seeing my Mum, DD and my Grandkids, but suspect his Mum will kick off cos we're not going there for Xmas day:o:o
Eevn if he went to his family this year I wouldn't be going, as didn't enjoy it last year, and felt like it was an endurance test as we were there from 12pm -2am:eek::eek:

Lirin

Haven't worked out this year yet, will see what happens when baby arrives, I think.

We have always had DSD one year Christmas eve and Christmas day morning, the next year would be Christmas Day and Boxing morning. I think that's a tad awkward at times, but it keeps everyone happy for the most part.

With ourselves, one year will be Christmas Day at DH's parents, the next year will be at mine. Again, most seem happy, as if we aren't with them on Christmas Day we usually travel down and stay overnight just before or after.

We have talked this year about introducing a year that's just us, but being honest, it's unlikely to happen! Both our mothers love cooking and entertaining too much, and if we stayed at home, they'd travel up anyway!

Edit- Ohhhh..... this year I get so much holidays over Christmas as I'll be on maternity leave! It'll be like Christmas as a child again!

Metranil_Vavin

Decided to bump this thread up again as we are now in mid October and Christmas is looming on the horizon!
I absolutely LOVE Christmas and still hold many dear childhood memories of happy Christmas's spent with my family over the years.
I think in my 38 years I have spent 37 of them with my family. OH and I have been together 5 years and as we live in London and my family are London-based, we have always gone there on Christmas Eve and spent Christmas Day there, and then headed off early doors on boxing Day to spend the next few days up in warwickshire with OH's parents.
This year however we are going to OH's parents Christmas Eve and doing Christmas Day up there, and Boxing Day back in London with my folks. We have a 9 month old DS so it's his first Christmas and I am SO excited as Christmas is going to be taking on an altogether more fun vibe from here on (although who will enjoy all the sparkle and glitz more out of DS and I, is anyone's guess! )
As we have spent all our Christmas Day's with my parents, it's only fair we go to OH's family this year, and the fact that they get to spend DS's first Christmas Day with him is a huge bonus..OH's mother is squealing with excitement already and it's still only October!
I'm quite looking forward to it to be honest. OH's mum loves Christmas as much as I do and will make it all hugely magical for DS. They live in a small village in the middle of the countryside, so it should be all lovely and picturesque..open fire, lots of lovely food and drink massive tree etc :T
My parents find Christmas a bit of a chore as they are a bit older, and whilst they love to see us all, I think my mum finds the whole thing a bit overwhelming, so she is quite happy for us to spend it elsewhere and call in Boxing Day for cuddles with DS and leftover food

meritaten

could you drop your daughter off at her nans (spend a little time there of course) and then go on to your OHs? then pick your daughter up at teatime?

My daughter has a son by a previous partner and the way they work it is that son goes to his dads on Christmas Eve. is picked up by mum around 10.00 am Christmas day ,then brought up to MY mothers where they do the family present opening. they then come back to mine (nightmare - I have fourteen people to feed christmas dinner to in a tiny terraced house).
I think family tradition is all very nice - but I do wish my sons and daughters would think of and establish NEW family traditions because its getting very stressful!

thistledome

jtr2803 wrote: »

Thanks for sharing your experiences and suggestions, I thought I would update as it looks like we have come to a solution!! .

I can't take the credit for it though as it all happened purely by chance. I asked my daughter on Tuesday what she wanted to do for Christmas day/dinner this year and it turns out that rather than spend the morning with us as she has done since she was born, she wants to stay over at her Dads Christmas eve and spend the morning with him and his wife before coming back to us about 2pm for dinner and the rest of the day. I will miss her terribly in the morning but I decided a few years ago she was old enough to make her own decisions.

Anyway, that actually makes things much more simpler, I need to finalise with the other half but my current plan is for me and him to spend the morning together at home and exchange gifts/have breakfast and then around noon, I will go to my mums and he will go to his mums so we can each have dinner with our families. Not too sure what will happen in the evening yet, either I will go to his or I will stay the night at my mums as I haven't spent the evening with her for a few years now.

feel like I can relax at last :rotfl:

I'm confused.:o If your Daughter is staying with her Father until 2ish, how are you going round your Mums at 12? Or is her Father bringing her to your Mum's? Or am I being daft and missing something?

I'm glad you're going to your Mum's though. I wouldn't consider Xmas without my old Mum either :xmastree:

Abbafan1972

These days it's just the 4 of us staying at home (me, hubby & 2 DD's).

When I was young, it was just me and my parents on Xmas day for dinner and my would Nan would alternate round the relatives, so we would get her at some point . Usually on Christmas evening we would visit one of my Aunties, or they would visit us.

We have been to OH's parents a couple of times, but they've never come to us, because they never would Although we're not on speaking terms with them now anyway, so that's not an option anymore. We have been to either my Mom's on Xmas day or Boxing day.

These days though, my Parents usually book to go out for dinner and don't include us in their plans, so we just let them get on with it. :cool: They will visit us on Xmas eve, we exchange presents and then we usually see them at some point over the Xmas holidays.

Thinking about when we went to mils for Xmas dinner, they always just do mashed potato and not roast. It doesn't matter to me, as I will pretty much eat what's put in front of me. My Mom though was horrified "what no roast potatoes at Xmas!". :eek: " You can't do that".