My son's 18th birthday wish list

kingfisherblue

Now that he is 18, he can pay for his own phone (either PAYG or contract), driving lessons, etc - if he's still in sixth form or at college, he can get a job in a supermarket to pay for it.

TBH, he sounds like a right selfish brat and I would be ashamed if he was mine. I did have a party for my daughter when she was 18 - free venue (they made plenty from the bar, so they charged a refundable deposit), a friend did the DJing, another friend didn't know what to buy so he paid for her cake. It only cost me the catering, which my daughter, my mum, and I did between us (although I paid for it). She also got some money, I think it was £50. having said that, my daughter (although defintely not perfect) helps round the house (a bit!), helps with her brothers - one is disabled, and does more cooking than me.

browneyedbazzi

The whole attitude of being entitled to things just shocks me!

When I was growing up you took what you were given/offered and were grateful for it! To this day I feel awkward asking for anything (my birthday is soon and my boyfriend is continually asking what I'd like but I can't bring myself to give him a list!)

My ex's niece once brought over a catalogue in which she'd hi-lighted a number of items and graciously told me I could buy her the hi-lighted items for Christmas. She got nothing for Christmas that year or for her birthday that was a few weeks later. I'm quite nasty about that sort of thing though...my nephew isn't getting gifts this year because after spending a long time shopping for him (and a fair bit of money) last Christmas he opened his gifts, barely looked at them then asked 'is that it?'....answer: 'yep it is'.

Perhaps I'm horrible, but I do think that some spoiled kids need to be taught a lesson once in a while!

*max*

Am I the only one feeling uncomfortable with a mother calling her son a "twonk" on a public forum and then listing all those reasons why, so she can get sympathy?

I'm sorry OP, but your son is exactly that: your son. You made him. You made him the way he is now. I know everyone will say "he's an adult now...blah blah blah"..but you MADE him the way he is. So, ok, maybe he's an ungrateful tw4t, but what example has he had? Seriously, it's all too easy to blame your kids for their failures, thinking it's unfair, they're ungrateful or whatever. But who has been raising them? Who has been setting the example? That's right, you know who. Your son is the person you helped create, and his mistakes? Well, they're partly yours. So instead of venting on a public forum about how awful he is, and try to ridicule him, think about it. He's 18. He's not finished yet.

victory

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dirtysexymonkey

*max* wrote: »

Am I the only one feeling uncomfortable with a mother calling her son a "twonk" on a public forum and then listing all those reasons why, so she can get sympathy?

I'm sorry OP, but your son is exactly that: your son. You made him. You made him the way he is now. I know everyone will say "he's an adult now...blah blah blah"..but you MADE him the way he is. So, ok, maybe he's an ungrateful tw4t, but what example has he had? Seriously, it's all too easy to blame your kids for their failures, thinking it's unfair, they're ungrateful or whatever. But who has been raising them? Who has been setting the example? That's right, you know who. Your son is the person you helped create, and his mistakes? Well, they're partly yours. So instead of venting on a public forum about how awful he is, and try to ridicule him, think about it. He's 18. He's not finished yet.

yup! the irony is that people like the op dont understand that they have caused it. they think its someone elses fault. the children are actually victims of bad parenting but sadly the parents dont think they have done anything wrong. its sickening really. any decent person would be ashamed of how theyve dragged their child up, they wouldnt laugh about it.

victory

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victory

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dirtysexymonkey

victory wrote: »

Well I apologize to you if you consider calling my son a twonk unreasonable but I could justifiably call him a very lot more, that is to be sure:D

Unfortunately I can take a lot of blame for a lot of things but I never made him like he is now, money grabbing, wanting to match or better his mates whose parents seem richer than me, until he was around 12/13 he seemed happy with what we could afford and give him, then all the latest phones, laptops, keeping up with the Joneses came in and the arguments started, I cannot afford it for myself let alone him and because constantly he feels that he is left out, can't keep up, has not got the latest stuff he feels hard done by.

I never made his life like this, teenagers did, consumerism did, you have to have all this stuff to be the cool one did.

It is no way sympathy it is a fact of life, all the kids out there these days wants better, designer, the latest, the best, the most expensive, well, son off you go and work for it and you can have whatever you want, I was never after all these things because in my day there was never all this need to be better than the other kids, I had a great life.

My son needs to know that we cannot afford it, he needs to know his world we cannot provide for him, we do not have to, he will be 18 and needs to get a job and seek his own way in life with the latest car, laptop, designer clothes and whatever else he thinks his little weekly money that he will bring in can get him, he needs a reality check

like i said - someone elses fault. if what you say is true then all teenagers in this country should be like your son, and they are clearly not. it is you. accept it and deal with it.

victory

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thegirlintheattic

OP is it possible to set your son a goal, something like if he saves up and pays for driving lessons you'll give him something towards a car (if you can afford to save for a £100 or so)?