Trying for a Baby Part 7

fannyanna

Rumfeeble - what an awful situation to find yourself in. I'm not suprised you were so upset. I'm angry at your sister for saying that so I can't imagine how you must have felt.

ikkle87

abis21 if you go to your chart, on the top right hand corner there are some options, choose sharing, click get code and then you want the one thats in the bbCode box. xx

vesper

Huge hugs rumfeeble. I'm quite lucky in the respect of family and babies. My sister is the youngest of the family at 25 and is very career orientated and would rather not have kids, my cousins are in their 40's and have never had girlfriends never mind thought of children. So I don't have pregnant family members to make me jelious. Luckily none of the family have put the pressure on me to have children, even though quite realistically I will be the only one that will carry this part of our blood line and name on (I kept my surname when I got married, well actually we went double barrelled, as I didn't want our line to die out). My parents just aren't bothered about children at all, infact the only one that is, is my aunt who would love me to have kids so she can spoil them, as she's accepted she's not going to be a grandmother.

Luckily there's no pressure from OH's side either, his dad I know secretly would like grandkids, but he's far too proud and stolic to ever confess that. We don't see the rest of his family, only about once a year if lucky.

cleofish

hi everyone,
just needed a bit of a chat, im still on holiday and we are on the new york bit of the holiday now, we have just come back from a day of walking so taking a break to rest my feet.

Ive not been feeling too stressed with ttc things this month (or so i thought!) as we have been on holiday and lots to take my mind off it and i had what seemed to be a +ve on the opk, so i had thought at least ive ov this month, but alas it was not to be this month and im now cd1.
But even though i didnt think i was thinking too much of ttc, i must have been deep down as I am really upset and the only words that describes how i feel is sad and hopeless.

Me and oh had a bit of an argument as well this morning, i just wanted 10 minutes to myself to have a cry (but i hadnt told him that, i just told him leave me alone, i need to be on my own) and he took offensive, looking back i should have told him af had arrived but i just felt gutted. I just feel a bit useless really, going to the toilet and seeing blood and knowing that im back to square 1 again is disheartening i think its the loss of hope for that month thats hard.

so here i am back at cd 1, its been 3 complete months now since the mmc and i really had hoped i would have caught again in the 1st month(we can but hope). When i got pregnant with the mmc we only had sex once that month and it was on my birthday! so shows how lucky that month was!

but i know if i think logically the chemo i had before and the drugs im taking for my epilepsy must have some sort of an effect and perhaps after the mmc it must take a while for my body to get back to normal.

but it still sucks and probably being a little bit angry what with being cd1 im thinking what is the point! the effect, the stress, the stress of getting oh to b'd more that he normallys does and then the 2ww while ss like a maniac (i really did feel sick this month) all for nothing, while pretending to myself that im fine that i can take it or leave it but im obviously not fine when on cd1 i break down! grrr:mad: and to top it all im angry at myself as im in new york and im still letting ttc get to me, i should be enjoying myself im on holiday but im crying in my hotel toilet this morning after arguing with oh, very unholiday like! grr again!:mad:

sorry for the rant but your my only friends in a big city right now, oh pats my arm and says dont worry it will happen soon and we will try again next month but on cd1 it feels a million miles away.

i think there should be free vouchers for wine and chocolate for women when af arrives, at least we will have something to look forward to if we dont get a bfp!

and on that note im off to scout out some chocolate, although me thinks i will be needing to get back to the gym after this holiday, americas really do love their food!

hugs to everyone else on cd1s or having a crappy time with bleeding.

lemonmelon_2

Massive (((((((hugs)))))) to rumfeeble and cleofish, hope you're both feeling better soon, I can't believe how insensitive your sister was rumfeeble- I think if you haven't ever had to wait for something you don't realise how hard-horrible-heartwrenching it can be. So sorry for cd1 cleofish.

I'm just waiting for af on Thursday here, I don't think I can get my hopes up but I wish I had some good news to tell my OH for a change, goodness knows we could do with it.

I wish we could swap with the men for a month, I think it would be so interesting to see both sides of it. I could sympathise with the pressure he feels to perform and he could understand how let down I feel by my own body.

rumfeeble

Cleo, big hugs honey, each time AF arrives it feels like its the end of the world, and the longer we keep trying the more we convince ourselves this will be our month and the worse we feel if it doesn't happen. Please try to find your pma, you are in NY how amazing is that!

Any rock music fans here? I've been listening to Creeds song don't stop dancing, some of the lyrics seem to explain how I feel and if you add a word into the chorus ..... Children don't stop (baby) dancing it kind of fits (particulaly after suffering a Mc)

Vesper -its lovely having a big family but right now I just feel so envious and of course the pregnant ones are getting all this extra attention and it feels like they are rubbing it in my face.

Fannyanna, thanks, I thought maybe I was overreacting but your right its not fair that she told everyone, now all I'm going to get is are you pregnant yet then?

This TTC rollercoaster is so hard

bigzippy

Rumfeeble - no wonder you're so :mad: and I would be furious! I think you should tell her tomorrow that you understand she got caught up in the excitement, but you told her that in confidence and it really upset you that she told everyone your private business

Cleo, sorry to hear about your upset too
(and everyone else that has been upset recently, for one reason or another, I've been having the appropriate responses from behind the veil of lurkdom )

fannyanna - SO glad the bleeding is tailing off

kavics17

Welcome newbies!!!

And huge hugs who need them!

CD3 here, blood turned brownish, hoping that bleeding will finish later today. That would mean that this month was back to normal (30 day cycle with short AF).

Work will be busy this week mainly because I haven't even started my assignment so need to do it within my working hours:o.

Have a good day everyone!

lemonmelon_2

I had such a clear, vivid dream last night that I was pregnant, it was so upsetting to wake up and realise I was just dreaming

Hi bigz :wave: hope things are getting better with your MIL

good luck with your assignment kavics

miss_emmajane

Morning all

Hugs to those having a hard time.

Lemonmelon, I hate it when that happens, hope you have a nice day to make up for it.

I have woken up feeling really tired, and am slowly attempting to get ready for work ... most probably post-weekend off blues but as per TWW I am convincing myself that everything is a sign ........ oh dear!