"Simply not solvent!

Seaxwyn

Thanks Verbatim!

My OH has been promised work at the college for next term "but less than this year". However - and very promisingly - I saw an ad for a recruitment fair at the local further education college and sent him along. They were interested in his experience and said they'd get him in for sessional lecturing there. It's a 10 min bike ride rather than a one hour drive, so far better if that comes off.

I haven't done anything about finding more work myself I am stringing out a little bit of work that should have taken me two days and is taking two weeks..... until that is done can't focus on getting a CV together.

taxi73

It's so hard making your mind up isn't it?..only you will be able to work it out though.Kids are usually brats at that age ...they have you ripping your hair out.
Good news on OHS work !!!How's that work you're doing coming along?

mizmir

Oh yes - the work-life balance thing. I wish I could crack it too. My work (and OH's) tends to seep (well flood actually) into what should be free time - so never get that satisfaction of being "finished". If you did get a job for the reasons you mention you'd need one that didn't do that, that finished when the working hours ended. So many don't though....

I guess I would be asking how much you enjoy the self employed work? Is the issue you have with getting down to it more organisational or is it that fundamentally you are not motivated by it any more? Really hard to be self-employed if that is the case. But if it is organisation there are things you can do. I know my wonderful wise sister used to be very disorganised and now - though she doesn't always feel it - she is generally on top of things. She's done it sorting out one thing at a time and adapting "systems" to suit her.

Good luck. Lots of big thinking which is always tough.

Seaxwyn

Hi there ladies

How I wish I could disentangle all the complicated feelings I have around my work. I do value my independence and freedom, and the amazing projects I work on.

But I don't like the loneliness, the fact that I'm solely responsible for the jobs I do and have noone to bat ideas around with or have a whinge to if things don't go as they should. I have to keep up a professional face to my clients while feeling very far from professional inside.

I have always worked in the same sector and it's very much part of my identity. Only I realise as time goes by that it was the working with like-minded people on an equal footing that I used to like. Now I'm separated from them in a client-consultant relationship it's not nearly so enjoyable.

I am wondering if I would be happier doing a job that I didn't feel so passionate about, and keeping my writing and campaigning for a hobby.

And the talk on here of buying houses and retiring early freaks me out as I am very far from even being able to think of either thing. Keeping my head above water month on month is all I can hope to achieve. I am 44 with no pension and only paying the interest on my mortgage.

Oh dear.... this isn't helping me get through my work!

mizmir

Can you do the old "pros and cons" list thing for all the options? May be corny but it is useful sometimes just to get things out of your head and onto paper.

Forget about anyone else - where do you want to be in a year's time? Three years? Five years? How can you make it happen?

Oh and if it is any consolation at all the prospect of early retirement for me is a dream not a likelihood! I am 45 and have 19 years still to run on a very scary mortgage.... But I am keeping it in my sights not to stop working but to change what I do.... so in reality I am putting back my self-employed dream 5-10 years!

taxi73

Hi Seaxwyn..so sorry to see you struggling with this again.Mizmir has a valid point about pros and cons.Is there a massive difference in the pay rates of you being s/e or salaried in the same work?..if not then maybe office based would be better for you.
I'll not be retiring early either with these debts to pay off nor moving....and I'm 44

Seaxwyn

I constantly draw up lists of pros and cons, and it always comes down heavily in favour of staying self-employed. I need to find a creative way of looking at it from a fresh perspective and maybe finding a way of doing self-employment differently. I used to do a lot more freelancing in clients' offices, and while that has its drawbacks, it is probably better than being mostly at home.



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mizmir

Seaxwyn wrote: »

I constantly draw up lists of pros and cons, and it always comes down heavily in favour of staying self-employed. I need to find a creative way of looking at it from a fresh perspective and maybe finding a way of doing self-employment differently. I used to do a lot more freelancing in clients' offices, and while that has its drawbacks, it is probably better than being mostly at home.

Creative ways of looking at it sounds good. If what you miss is the interaction can you try to do more on site? I do sympathise with the motivation thing. I am still sitting here having set myself the target of doing 4.5 hours on my funding application (my main work for today) and I still haven't started . I've done lots of other useful and necessary things but not this one. So I am going to break it down - make a list of smaller things that I can do to move this forward - with an easy win one right at the top!

Seaxwyn

I do sympathise Mizmir - that's me all over - doing anything but the main task. I'm going frantic now as I have not got much closer to finishing a job that needs to be put to bed tomorrow.

taxi73

I hope that green light means that you are "getting on with it"" so to speak.I wish I had the answers to your dilemmas I really do.