Please give me a hug - am having a crap time....

LookingAhead · 29 December 2006 at 5:07PM

Aww bless you jet.

I am glad you have your car back anyway and glad the police arrested him although shame they aren't charging him with anything! At least they definitely have him 'on record' now or something and they will know some history.

Good luck for early January....one step at a time eh?

saintly_2 · 29 December 2006 at 6:43PM

sending big big big cyber hugz to you, your children and ur ickle rabbit.

cant imagine wot u r goin through but there is always huge support for you on here

stay strong!!!

Chrismojam · 29 December 2006 at 7:41PM

BIG HUGS to you and yours..........

I know what it is like to be in this type of relationship...though...thankfully...without kids........I don't bear to think what I'd have done to him if I had kids to think of as well....I doubt I'd be a free woman that's for sure....

Lots of hugs to you....think of yourself and your kids.....that is all that is important in all this!

lynzpower · 29 December 2006 at 7:49PM

Oh hun
Ive just seen this, and sendfing a massive hug.

Please make sure that the police offer you every support going in terms of securing the house, they have a cash pot for that, and is done to a high standard, but sometimes you have to pressure for it.

Wishing you all the best, and sending another hug :grouphug:

Lynz
xx

rainbowrisin · 29 December 2006 at 10:46PM

Following on from what lynzpower says, it's also well worth making sure your name is up in lights with the local police DV unit - they can ensure you are put on an "Extra high response time" (7 minutes instead of 11 minutes if you dial 999 where I was living, as my address was "flagged" with the police). Ring your local police station and they will be able to give you the police DV unit number if you haven't got it al sorted already.
Also remember that if he comes round and won't go away, you can call the police on 999 if you feel you are at risk - you don't have to wait for the situation to escalate before you get the police round - he can be charged with behaviour likely to cause a breech of the peace, even if a breech has not yet occurred. Don't worry about calling the police out because the situation "isn't serious enough". If you are frightened get the police out.
Don't let the maggot into your house.
It may also be worth making some sort of "escape plan" should he decide to put through a door or window and gains entry - sorry, if that's OTT - it's what I had to do with my ex-OH and I thanked my lucky stars I did so.
Enormous hugs to you, the littlies and Mr (or Mrs?) Bunny. You are all doing really well.

halloweenqueen_2 · 30 December 2006 at 4:07PM

Good luck jet - hope all goes well for you in the new year!

smilermonkey · 30 December 2006 at 6:48PM

Hey, big hugs Jet. With regards to you feeling bad about how to deal with the kids in this situaton all I can say is that in my job as a youth worker I work with (sadly) many young peopel who have lived in similar situations for many years, if not all their life. I also come across those whose parent got out of the situation. I can only offer the fact that although those that got out went through a terrible time for a while, they seem to be better for it now, opposed to those still in it who regard violence as normal and will no doubt find it themselves in later life.

Hold tight Jet, your kids will thank you for it.

piptiddlepip · 30 December 2006 at 7:06PM

I just read this thread...how awful for you. I have my fingers crossed that everything works out ok for you, though I have no proper advice to offer. Thank god you will never take this man back again. He sounds as if he has no respect for his children, let alone you, to ruin their christmas this way.