uhh ohh...My 3 year old has just asked me where babies come from....

Ames

My mum told me when I was about five it was when mummy goes to the toilet after daddy and that was why she had to clean it every week.

I was hugely relieved a couple of years later when playground gossip put me right. Mum had told me not to worry it was only mummies and daddies, but I'd been a bit suspicious of that.

Mum wasn't too impressed though when I said to my three year old sister 'do you know how babies are made' and then told her the truth.

sassyblue

I'm sure he'll be fine with the answer of 'mummys tummy but if he continues to ask how he got there, the 'special cuddle'.

Mine's now almost 5 and after catching me with panty liners wants to know what they're for (there's a pouch in my tummy where he grew and every so often to keep the pouch healthy it bleeds a little bit).

Now he wants to know why he didn't fall out when l had a poo when he was in my tummy and l had to tell him a lady has 3 holes. Trouble is, most answers these days are met with 'can l see?' :cool: :rotfl:

delain

Person_one wrote: »

You're looking at it from an adult perspective. A three year old will take the information completely in her stride and won't think it sleazy or awkward or anything like that. A 3 year old still thinks bodily functions are among the mot fascinating and hilarious things in the world and hasn't learned to be ashamed about their body yet!

I think its really poor parenting to leave your kids ignorant and hope that schools pick up the slack. I wonder how many kids I confused by telling them the truth about sex and babies when their parents had kept them in the dark!

I haven't kept my children in the dark... I wouldn't want my three year old to run up to a woman and say 'You've got a vagina and babies come out' either. I just think three is too young. Sue me

I also have twins with autistic tendencies, and they really would be telling strangers that they have a vagina or penis :eek: and they just don't need to know at 3, especially not when 'from mummy' will do nicely.

The 'special cuddle' kids will still have a shock when they learn it at school won't they?

Person_one

delain wrote: »

I haven't kept my children in the dark... I wouldn't want my three year old to run up to a woman and say 'You've got a vagina and babies come out' either. I just think three is too young. Sue me

I also have twins with autistic tendencies, and they really would be telling strangers that they have a vagina or penis :eek: and they just don't need to know at 3, especially not when 'from mummy' will do nicely.

Do they run up to strangers and say 'you've got a bottom and poo comes out?' or stuff like that? Its part of your job to teach them appropriate behaviour around strangers as well. Most strangers are probably well aware that they have a vagina or a penis and will get over being reminded by a 3 year old.

You did specifically say you would fob them off with 'magic' and leave it to the school at 7! How is that not keeping them in the dark? What do you plan to say when they ask why you told them false information? A 7 year old can definitely realise 'Hmm, that's not what mum's been saying, one of these grown ups is lying to me...'

Jacks_xxx

We used an excellent book called How a baby is Made.

It's from the 1970s, entirely factual very straightforward and simple, and Swedish originally I think. Because of it our children don't remember a time when they didn't know where babies come from and were immune to playground rumours.

It's not for everybody but somebody had just told my 3 year old that the man holds the lady down and wees into her which caused a lot of distress, so we needed facts not fluffy fairy tales.

Here are some links to the cartoon illustrations. Some of you won't consider them suitable for your own child, but we felt that kids know on some level when they're being lied to or misled, and we felt that the absolute truth was better than believing horrible things they were told in the playground.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/steviecat/4812400814/

http://www.spareroom.co.nz/wp-content/uploads/2006/09/BABIESfinal2.jpg

http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_thydkFMyNjE/TJlY-4VO_7I/AAAAAAAAB0o/9ZGKUuMBrvI/s1600/333.3+k74t.page+13.jpg

Here are the reviews on Amazon too:

http://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Baby-Made-Piccolo-Books/dp/0330242970/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1309635133&sr=1-1

delain

Person_one wrote: »

Do they run up to strangers and say 'you've got a bottom and poo comes out?' or stuff like that? Its part of your job to teach them appropriate behaviour around strangers as well. Most strangers are probably well aware that they have a vagina or a penis and will get over being reminded by a 3 year old.

You did specifically say you would fob them off with 'magic' and leave it to the school at 7! How is that not keeping them in the dark? What do you plan to say when they ask why you told them false information? A 7 year old can definitely realise 'Hmm, that's not what mum's been saying, one of these grown ups is lying to me...'

It has been explained to DD1 before school explained it... I doubt she would remember being told 'magic' at the age of three. Much older than three she would have had a better explanation. I would not tell them magic after the age of 5 or so.

Actually yes they have been known to do things like that... especially when they were being toilet trained, which we were unable to do until they were almost 4, and went hand in hand with them then being terrified of most toilets (they would still rather hold it for an hour or even wet their pants than use a public loo) and smearing.

Oh yes, it's really a piece of cake to educate children who willingly poo on their hand and spread it on the walls like chocolate spread about social niceties :mad: It certainly is my extremely difficult job, and I do a damn good job, but children with ASD are not normal children, you don't know what they're going to do next, or what's going to come flying out of their mouth, and it's not as easy as 'tell them not to' they can't really help it and training them out of things is a really long and involved process!

Currently I am and have been working with the school and ed psych dealing with their social boundary issues... along with the community paediatrician, child development centre (which is a group of SEN spcialised doctors), portage service amongst others.

None of that would have been needed if 'telling them not to' did the trick

pinkshoes

I've just had to answer the same question recently to my 6 year old cousins!

I come from a family where everyone gets married, then has kids, so they'd just assumed that babies were something that married people got, and were very confused how me and OH could have a baby when we weren't married.

Their mum and I muddled though a vague description of the truth, of how daddy puts a sperm in mummy, which swims to the egg, then a baby grows... We just let them ask questions when they didn't understand i.e. "what's a sperm?" etc...!

20 minutes later I then had to explain breastfeeding to them, which was SO simple compared to trying to explain the baby thing!

teabag29

Thanks for all the replies guys....well when my hubby came in from work I told him what dd had asked and what he thought we should say to her and his response was....

"from the shop kid and if you dont stop asking questions i'll take you back!"

hmmmm not the response I was after so I went with the 'from mummys tummy' and she seemed perfectly happy with that. However after staring into space for 5 minutes or so her next question was "mummy...where does danger come from?" followed 5 minutes after that by "mummy where do spiders come from?" lol. Bless her, she's very inquisitive at the moment

mrcow

teabag29 wrote: »

followed 5 minutes after that by "mummy where do spiders come from?" lol. Bless her, she's very inquisitive at the moment

Well that one's easy enough......

......."from under your bed whilst you're sleeping at night"

delain

mrcow wrote: »

Well that one's easy enough......

......."from under your bed whilst you're sleeping at night"

:rotfl::rotfl:

If my mum had said that to me at that age she would have had many a sleepless night after