Waiting for a proposal - how did you stay sane?!

squ1rrel5

You know what, its weird but I feel more happy for the announcements on this thread than I have for the ones in real life!!
To be fair if they were close friends, I'd be ecstatic but because the most recent ones have just been more or less acquaintances then I'm not too fussed about..plus I think its because that some of them have happened in such a short space of time so I know they havent gone through the anguish that we have!!

jtr, you'll definitely have to stay here until you have your 'official' proposal plus I want to hear about all your plans for the wedding...and findingyourownway, I'm quite interested in yours in particularly as you have a short timescale which is what I would like for mine, once I get round to that stage!!!

As for the girls who are still waiting like me, I have made a New Years wish that 2012 will be the year for all of us (lets hope the sooner the better!) :T

jtr2803

Aww shucks girls, you have me all emotional

Well I did tell my mum and she was really happy but she knows we have to wait for the official version to happen (it's starting to sound like a conspiracy isn't it?!). She said she had a feeling in her waters that something would happen yesterday but I guess that's mums for you :rotfl:.

Obviously having been a patron of this thread for a while now I have quite a few ideas and probably also have a venue in mind, purely because I used to work there 9 odd years ago and I know it's reasonable, it's pretty, they are good at weddings and it's very local to our friends and family and it's really important that they are there. I would think the actual ceremony will be quite intimate due to OH's anxiety but I am hoping we can have a big motown type party afterwards :beer:. We both love Motown music and aren't really into all the current clubby type stuff and I want it to really reflect us. I think having already been married once I have a better idea of the things that I deem to be important and what I am sure is superficial and not really worth the money which is a plus. I don't want lots of formality so there won't be a top table, am hoping we could do a horseshoe shape if numbers allow .

I haven't seen my dad since I was 15 and I want my mum and brother to walk me down the aisle (mum especially) as she is the most important part of my life, aside from DD of course, I can't wait to tell DD she is going to be a bridesmaid but I can't yet as she is a blabbermouth (not sure where she gets that from?!) and all and sundry would know so it will be a nice surprise for her. I know it's naughty and I am getting ahead of myself but I seem to be a little in love with:

http://www.glamourousgowns.co.uk/shopdata/show.php?dress=3570

I want something very different to my first wedding which was an A line dress with straps. I might even go for a coloured prom dress, won't know till I start trying them all on :eek::rotfl:

I am sure I will be spending a lot of time here as once we have sorted date/budget/venue/guestlist I fully expect to be doing a lot of the finer detail planning myself. I know OH will find it stressful so am happy to do this bits on my own as I know they just won't be his 'thing'.


Edited to Add:

OH put some shopping channel on earlier and was watching them trying to sell huge Tanzanite rings at upwards of £1,500, he said 'that seems like a lot of money?!'..........I told him not to spend anywhere near that much and that he should just give me a Haribo ring then if I get hungry I can eat it and he can just replace it at little cost. I get the feeling is he prepping himself LOL!!!

jtr2803

minerva_windsong wrote: »

Congratulations JTR! So chuffed for you. And March is a very good month to get married - my sister's wedding anniversary is 5th March

We had friends over last night and got the usual jokes about when we were going to get married, including one suggestion if my OH was waiting for me to ask on the 29th February. He did say it'll happen but didn't give any hints other than that, which I can live with for now.

Just done a quick Facebook check and one girl I randomly knew at school has got engaged, but I don't really talk to her any more so I'm OK with that. That said I'll be seeing the couple I thought might get engaged at Christmas next week and if they're engaged I have a horrible feeling I'll be devastated - it sounds so selfish and childish but it doesn't feel fair when we've been together longer than they have.

It's not selfish or childish, that's exactly what I was dreading. When my boss got engaged after 9 months with his girlfriend he couldn't even bring himself to tell me, someone else at work had to, probably because he knew I'd be upset. I sobbed privately for about an hour but did my best to keep a happy face on at work.



No chance, I suspect I'll be here just as long if not longer by virtue of being one of the youngest on the thread...



I agree about the cost - it seems to be that a massive expensive wedding has become the norm, and that actually makes me quite sad. Granted a lot of this might be because people want their family and friends around them, which I can totally understand, and then obviously that drives up the cost of things like the venue and food. But equally there are things that you don't necessarily need to have if you don't want them, and ways you can save money by making things yourself, calling in favours from friends etc without the wedding looking 'cheap' (and frankly, anyone who would think that about a wedding they'd been invited to wasn't worth the ink used to write the invite!).

I should point out I don't think there's anything wrong with having an expensive wedding at all - I know that we'll probably have to have one because of the number of people we'd want there so obviously we'd have to find somewhere to hold all those people and feed them - but I don't think that all weddings must be expensive if it's not what the couple want.

I agree, a good work friend is having a HUGE do but I can see it's causing her so much stress already as they ended up buying a new house and they have really over comitted themselves financially. Doesn't help that they both have big families so their day guest list is 80, I don't think I know that many people in total!

AllyS wrote: »

Awww chick you are so lovely, please do not worry I really am happy for you.

I think you should look into venue's asap and then say to OH that you have to book it or else you wont get the date that you would really like, I am sure that he is already on to the official planning of engagement tho and just keeping it as a surprise

Yesterday was a funny old day for me, I asked OH if that if I officially proposed to him what would he say and he said he would find it really strange and a bit weird :mad: he said that it is something that he really really wants to do. I am just going to have to be patient, I know it sounds daft but I really liked the idea of 12/12/12 wedding date, but that is looking very unlikely now! Then whilst we were eating last night, my DS said to OH please marry my Mum I really want you to get married, I know! propose to her at midnight! OH nicely explained that he would not propose on a memorable date and then I said, please can we change the subject. I really didn't want to get tearful, make OH feel guilty and then ruin the evening.

Anyway I am rambling now, I really can't wait to hear your wedding plans JTR - any ideas what type of wedding yet?

12/12/12 was a date suggested by OH when we went to a wedding on 10/10/10 so he better count himself lucky I've only suggested 2013, Thing is, you just never know. Even if he proposed in the summer you could still go for that date. Argh, it's the not knowing isn't it!? I remember last Christmas when my work mate got engaged being annoyed that she was going towards April/May this year cos I was thinking that's when I would be getting married . She also hinted at using purple which upset me, she knew it would be my first choice and it was something we had openly discussed, fortunately she ditched it!

squ1rrel5 wrote: »

You know what, its weird but I feel more happy for the announcements on this thread than I have for the ones in real life!!

I feel like this too, especially when I know it's someone who has felt all the emotions that we have. It's so hard to describe or rationally explain it to someone who doesn't 'get it'.


To be fair if they were close friends, I'd be ecstatic but because the most recent ones have just been more or less acquaintances then I'm not too fussed about..plus I think its because that some of them have happened in such a short space of time so I know they havent gone through the anguish that we have!!

jtr, you'll definitely have to stay here until you have your 'official' proposal plus I want to hear about all your plans for the wedding...and findingyourownway, I'm quite interested in yours in particularly as you have a short timescale which is what I would like for mine, once I get round to that stage!!!

As for the girls who are still waiting like me, I have made a New Years wish that 2012 will be the year for all of us (lets hope the sooner the better!) :T

I really hope we have some more too, I'll be hanging around with the champagne and party poppers ready for it

AllyS

JTR the dress is beautiful, I saw some on there that I liked too

spoonymoose

jtr, beautiful dress! :j

jtr2803

AllyS wrote: »

JTR the dress is beautiful, I saw some on there that I liked too

Hopefully you will get to pick one soon!

Went into town today, was hoping OH might whisk me past some jewellers to try and fish for ideas but gah, no such luck. Did catch him peeking in a dress and hire shop though :rotfl:

I'm counting down the days until Zumba starts up again at the moment, I really enjoy it and normally do 3 classes a week but they all stopped mid December and I know I am starting to put weight on :eek:

squ1rrel5

well what an odd day I had yesterday...
I think I must have been affected by your thread jtr, as I had a really vivid dream about my OH mentioning the word fiancee, and I said 'oh so does that mean we are engaged now then' and he said 'well i assumed we already were'!! I then asked if I could update it on facebook (ha!) so I changed my status, and then I got really upset as not one of my friends commented on it like it didnt matter!! Very random!!

Following on from that, as it was our last day before work I wanted to go out and do something (as it was a lovely sunny day) but OH was in a rubbish mood, being a miserable b***er and was just lounging on the sofa being lazy - I got so fed up of him faffing about that I decided to take myself off for a run - to start the new year fitness regime and just to get out the house!! :-)

Had only got round the corner from our house when I tried to manoevre round a tree that had falled down from last weeks high winds when I slipped and fell on some wet grass and smashed face first into the said tree! Just about had enough consciousness to phone OH, who whizzed around the corner in his car and whisked me off to A&E like a knight in shining armour!!

So I now have a hugely swollen nose - the hospital dont know if its broken yet, they cant tell until the swelling goes down properly, have to go back in a few days!! I think its probably okay to be honest but it doesnt look pretty I can tell you!!

I was so peed off with OH earlier in the day but he was so amazing yesterday that I realised just how much I actually love the man!!! Seeing his face when I was injured and he had to rush me to A&E I could see how upset he was, he let me cry on him when I was in so much pain in the hospital and then he came in to hold my hand when the doc took me in! Once everything was okay and we'd come home, he just couldnt do enough for me!

I've had to take today off work but he was so snuggly with me this morning before he left for work that I almost cried when he went!!

I think I've let this proposal thing overwhelm me lately, thinking that he's not that bothered about me but after yesterday, he's totally forgiven as I can see how much he does actually love me - even with my face looking the way it does!!

missminx

Ah squ1rrel5 What an eventful time you have had! Congratulations on official engagement Hope your poor face is much better soon

Men just don't think the same way that we do! They assume we know how they feel, and even when presented with the obvious they can miss it. A bit like housework, where they just don't see mess.....

Enjoy your knight in shining armour

squ1rrel5

missminx wrote: »

Ah squ1rrel5 What an eventful time you have had! Congratulations on official engagement

That bit was still the dream...never mind, it was lovely while it lasted!!

Stephb1986_2

Oh Squ1rrel5 you poor thing I hope your better soon massive hugs

Sometimes it takes things like that to happen to really realise how much they mean to you

Steph xx