SAHM paying off debts slowly

slm6002

Ok so OH has just started the conversation with DD about xmas.  He has always said since leaving that he will take us all to my sisters as i don't drive that far, come home then a few days later come and get us.  1 - he wont speak to me, so several hours in the car with him wont work, 2 - not sure my family will be very civil on seeing him, 3 - after pretending all was well last xmas and keeping it all from my family i think we need to do something different this year.  I don't want to stop him seeing his children at christmas and he has never been keen on the day, so it has been suggested (last xmas when he was feeling guilty and being kind to me) that i would have them xmas eve and xmas day and he could have them on some other days after xmas.  I have contacted sister to see if her and my dad had had the conversation yet over what was going to happen, but nothing has been organised yet.  I did tell DD that we dont even know if we will be allowed to stay there by then or if we will be in lockdown again.   I think i would like us all to go to my dads house (10 min down the road) for xmas day and then they can go to OH for boxing day and i can spend the day with my sister and dad.  I however if i have nice new shiny house by then, maybe i can host one of the days.  Something else to keep me thinking tonight

dawnybabes

I’d really try one if the big brokers and see what they can unearth, people do get mortgages on DMPs - they can hunt the market.

enthusiasticsaver

I agree that you need a specialist broker to get a mortgage after DMP if 6 years have not elapsed since defaults. Or park it for now but that means you can't move forward for getting your ex off the mortgage. 

slm6002

OK so i have been speaking with a lady from housing group - i filled in form in case i became homeless and she has been suggesting ways to move forward.  Todays call was to suggest i speak with the council, and then i mentioned mum lending me some money but benefits might stop.  Apparently if the money doesn't go into my bank account and i use it towards a deposit direct to the other person, then benefits people do not need to know.  She informs me it is allowed and not illegal.  This may be the way through it all.  The only reason i hadn't looked at it really before was because when i asked the benefits people they said they might stop, but until it had happened a decision could not be made, and i couldn't afford to not have the benefits.  Anyway not sure if any of that made sense, but i am now feeling more positive.  I do think i will end up selling this house so time to start cleaning properly and then get the agent round to put it on the market again

Verbatim

Do at least speak to a broker before making any firm decision. It should be free for an initial meeting. Also you could post on the appropriate board on mse. I think there's a mortgage or house buying board.

Aspiration

Great idea above. I used a whole of market, fee free broker before and there advice should be free. Hope you get a plan that works soon as know it can’t be easy.

slm6002

Thank you to you both.  I will go have a look

slm6002

OK so i have given my information to a mortgage broker from on here and there is no fee until an official offer on a mortgage has been made.  Fingers crossed.  In a bid to feel happier i went and looked at the house that popped up nearby.  It needs new doors, new windows for bathroom, kitchen and dining room.  They had intended on extending so left them.  Now they are divorcing so just need the house gone.  Carpets needed throughout but could live with the wooden floors upstairs for now.  Boiler is old and the guy said it might need replacing soon but does work at the moment.  Other than that, fill in few holes in walls from picture frames and a good paint and clean and it would be perfect.  Oh and the garden would need sorting, but weed and grass seed down would do as a good start.  I'm not saying it would be quick and it would take some energy, but it could be a lovely house and the new start i need.  The kids rooms are all fairly evenly sized and bigger than our current 'box room'. They don't need asking price but want a quick sale, so i guess that's me out, but you never know, it might not sell (being optimistic here lol).

slm6002

Right I have spoken with the mortgage broker and she has a couple of good possibilities for me.  She believes I should be able to get what I need at least for the current mortgage and then quite a bit more possibly, but think that will be out of my comfort zone budget wise.  At least I know there is hope.  I am currently trying to find all paperwork and documents (including bits boss hasn't given me yet).  The house I looked at yesterday has indeed had an acceptable offer made so that one will be gone.   Anyone have any opinions on purple bricks?  Having had very little interest on our house last time I am unsure it will sell, so not sure if i pay upfront for agents fees with PB it will be a waste of money.  However if it does sell I will have save 2-2.5k on fees.  I also did read somewhere on their site that if i took it off the market and then wanted to try again later it would not charge me again.  I only ask as i was quite impressed with the way i had to book appointment for the house i viewed yesterday.  I logged onto their site instead of ringing agent, picked the time slot i wanted and booked it.  I was able to give feedback directly to the owner and he could correspond directly back to me.  Obviously the I didn't make the offer, but it looks like the process is similar.  No waiting for feedback to be passed on and possibly get the real reason rather than a sugar coated one from agent.  Right off to find rest of the documents i need.

Aspiration

Brilliant that you’ve got options and I’m really pleased it went well!! 

Re the estate agents I have some experience. Purple Bricks was really good for a friend who had a prop in high demand last year and sold well and saved thousands. 

Family member has just used an estate agent and it cost 2k more but they sold the property for £5k more than they thought they’d get so really happy with it. 

If you’re selling to split from Ex DH then this would be a shared cost so you’d only pay half as he should pay the other half.

Just make sure no one else you know wants to buy it as soon as you sign if you sell to someone else it can be hard work as most agents want paying even though you may have sorted a private sale. 

Worst case though must be nice knowing you should be able to keep it and make it your own.

Feels like you’ve deserved some positive news for a while so really pleased for you!