SAHM paying off debts slowly

slm6002

Ooh i will look online thank you.  Tomorrow would have been our 15th wedding anniversary so mixed feelings.  Sad he has gone but also know he is not the nice person I miss so don't want that person he has become.   Normally we visit the beach and build sandcastles to celebrate but will have to come up with something else.  I was thinking of having a Christmas in June instead and having little celebration, but may have left it a little late for that now, plus with the restrictions its not quite right.  Will work on it for next year.

Kitten868

Sorry lovely. It's horrible. And wanting that person to talk to it all about but you can't because its them that hurt you. Do do something lovely tomorrow. You deserve it xxx

slm6002

That is so true.  I wish he was his old self and he would talk to me and hug me but he has changed far too much and is no longer someone i want to be with.  I'm not sure if that's who he really was even though in the 17 years i was with him he never acted like this, or if he is doing to hurt me so i leave him alone.  Either way the man i married no longer exists, its like he has died and i am indeed grieving for him.  I just wish i didn't need to deal or see him again and could pretend he was dead because at least that way i could remember him as the man i loved and not the man he has turned into.  I will try to do something nice tomorrow.   Anyway it is payday tomorrow so will have fun moving money around if nothing else

slm6002

Good morning - feeling cooler today thankfully as yesterday was just too hot for me.  Well that day went by without me thinking too much.  I am grateful we are on lockdown as i think normal celebrations etc are just washed over kind of so wasn't expected to go or do anything.  My mum warned DD that i might be sad so told her to let others know to be good and hug me lots.  Really it was just like any other day in this time.
I got a call from the bank about the mortgage application that i put in the other day which they had refused.  They said they take benefits into consideration and as they are my bank they can verify all of the income and expenditure i have.  They apparently offer 3-4 times income, which would in theory cover what i need for this house.  Unfortunately they can only offer me £40k, which is not 3-4 times income.  The lady on the phone couldn't see why it was so different.  Anyway an offer of 40 is better than a definite no.  Just not sure there i can find the other £41k ish.  My current mortgage people are calling on 30th so i will see what they can offer, but they don't accept benefits so i don't hold out much hope.  Oh well I'm sure it will sort itself out.
I was saying to mum last night that i need the house in my name by Christmas as OH has to vacate his caravan for the month of January each year because it is in theory only a holiday home.  I don't think he would want to stay here, especially as he hasn't stepped foot inside since leaving and rarely even comes on driveway now, but if he in theory owns half the house and finds himself homeless he may have no other option but to stay.  I really couldn't cope with that.  So far email from divorce people doesn't look like it has helped, but will keep hoping.  
Also waiting for the refund from bank.  Sent that back about 20 days ago now so hopefully it will appear soon.  Will just keep waiting for everything as it appears that's all i can do.
Right off to do something constructive as rambled on here for long enough.  Lots to do plus find out if the nursery i work at is safe to open next week after all tests were carried out on the water.

slm6002

Still no news on work as yet.  Kinda hope its not good so no going back quite yet.  (Edited... just heard we are safe to go back apart from one area of the building which will remain out of bounds until pipes can be changed - booo). That's naughty of me.  Went to the computer repair shop as 2 of the childrens laptops had issues.  New screen ordered and he hopes to repair the other one.  Think tuesday might be a spendy day when we go to collect them.  Have had firm words with the kids as we cant keep replacing things because they havent looked after them well.  I think if we were not home schooling at the moment i would have made them go without for a while and wait until i decided to mend them.  While we were on out drive daddy and nana came up in conversation.  It turns out the childrens cousin who lives with nana said OH will be getting a caravan to live in at the front of the house.  My mum and i always expected this was likely to happen and there is currently a static caravan there at the moment, but i think if you step inside you would go right though as it looks as rotten as can be.    He had already mentioned that he was going round to nanas (his step mum) to clear the garden up and it does make sense why now.  My money will get him his new static caravan.  I dont mind, but feel for the street.  That house is already the kind of house that you would not want to live near - bit like Onslo and Mrs Bucket woman off the tv lol, currently 8 dogs which several are big and loud.   DD not happy and will be letting OH know that she doesnt plan on staying there if thats the case.  Their house is already full to the brim and one of the daughters is currently in the conservatory for bedroom as the only space free.  She had a council house herself and we all painted it and kitted it out with furniture, but she abused it so much and didnt pay rent that they took it away from her so she is back home now, where it doesnt matter is she makes the mess!
Anyway thats the inlaws lol.  Off to do a zoom call for work so must go

slm6002

The fish tank has gone!  Few tears from DD but the rest of us seem happy.  We then rearranged the living room.  The house was tidied which was long overdue.  Pulled pork cooking away in the slow cooker so hopefully an easy dinner.  I also did some more work this morning for the boss, although that has not been collected yet.  Feel like its been productive today

slm6002

Well good news this morning as the bank refund has hit my bank which was a very pleasant surprise this morning.  The balance i have received is £2680.92.  Have put this into my emergency fund for now.  It will more than likely go on mortgage fees / house fees etc.  
We had a good day yesterday.  Just plodded around the house and watched some films.  I'm liking the positions of the chairs now the tank has gone.  Toad in the Hole and mash and veg for dinner which was yummy and warming - just what we needed yesterday.

slm6002

Had to take the cats to the vets today as they seemed to be having the same reaction as they did last year,  It would appear they are allergic to some sort of grass seed and then they start scratching and get really sore.  Last year the vets did tests and they needed steroids as well as antibiotics.  We claimed on the insurance last year as it was over the excess.  This year because it was almost definitely the same there were no tests needed and no antibiotics.  Just steroids.  Still £85 worth, but considering i had allowed for £160 in excess fees which i had saved up over the 12 months i am happy with that.  It looks like i will need them each year but as its a known expense its all ok.  I actually have £130 left in that account 'just in case' anything else happens.  I was much happier (not sure that's the right word for having to go to the vets lol) than going when you don't know how much it will cost.  Maybe relaxed it more appropriate.  Money in account and knowing what is wrong helps lol.
Got the mortgage company i am with tomorrow ringing me to see if they can help. I guess by tomorrow evening i should know where i stand

slm6002

Well i feel a little disappointed.  I had hoped to have found out some information but no one wants to advise today.  The mortgage company  rang to postpone until tomorrow so no decision there.  Also tried calling child maintenance people as its been a month and there has been nothing on my account - not even we've made contact.  Lady on the phone only really wanted to help if something had changed - said it will probably be at least another 2 weeks before i hear anything.  I've also tried calling the computer shop to see if the kids laptops are ready and every time it hangs up on me before it even rings.  Maybe it the weather but feeling a bit blah.  Oh well always tomorrow

Kitten868

Everything is on the go slow right now. Don't take it personally. I'm waiting on the ombudsman - they're very good at testing your patience. I think everyone's gone down the beach instead. 
Can you apply for the mortgage before you've got your CSA amount? X