Help! Domestic Violence!!

Frugalista

Hi, 5 weeks ago my boss was badly beaten up by her partner (I saw her the following morning ) - she called the police and he was arrested for Assault and Battery.

He has been back to the home twice (with a police escort) to collect some of his clothes, etc - both times he was verbally abusive to her in front of the police.

She has just heard today that the police are not going to prosecute him :eek::eek::mad::mad::mad:. She was sat there sobbing and shaking, terrified that he could come back home at any moment. She cannot leave as their home/business is one and requires someone to be on the premises 24/7.

She has phoned womens aid and the domestic violence helpline but cannot get to see anyone until next week!!

Can anyone offer any advice?

Sorry for the brevity of detail but he knows I post on here (but not my username) so I may delete some posts/facts later.

Thanks in advance.

Darlyd

WOW Can not get to see anyone till next week? F*** that is terrible ! Surely the police can offer her more assistance? She needs to get an injunction ASAP. Sorry I can't be any more help.. Poor girl.

Frugalista

Apparently, she has been told that an injunction will cost around £2,000 and she doesn't have that sort of money.

The policemen who responded initially and the one who came to take her statement all said they thought he would be prosecuted. One of them, when they first saw her, said "He's made a right mess of you!"

make_me_wise

That poor woman, small wonder she is so scared. That is awful that no-one can see or help her for a week at womens aid. They know the statistics, she could be dead by then, he sounds like a headcase.

Has she tried contacting Refuge 0808 2000 247. There is no way on earth I would be under the same roof as him. Sod the business, there is more to life. She needs to leave for now and stay with a friend or relative. Her safety is paramount

marmitepotato

I totally agree with Make me wise, she needs to get out and get out now. The buisiness and house dont matter, her life does matter.

Frugalista

Unfortunately she can't leave the business - it is a boarding kennels.

She has no close friends or family.

fannyanna

I'm afraid I have no words of advice but I'm shocked and disgraced. I hope you're able to get some good advice for your boss.

Darlyd

Frugalista wrote: »

Unfortunately she can't leave the business - it is a boarding kennels.

She has no close friends or family.

DARN ! OK I understand this. She needs to get other people there to take care of the animals and she needs to stay with a friend/relative.

She needs to get an injunction though, somehow. I had one done for an ex it did not cost me nothing (I was working) this was over 10 years ago, I can't remember how I got it. Police in my case were amazing.

Has she pressed charges? It should be going to court, hope there are photos, evidence, doctor records etc etc. Bar stu ard!!

Frugalista

Someone has to be there day and night - so, although she has someone working during the day - she is alone there at night. My OH has been and changed all the locks for her, but I don't think she can prevent him from returning home.

Can she still press charges even if the police aren't going to prosecute? I don't know how these things work.

The police took photos and her torn clothing as evidence and she also went to the doctor (at my insistance) to get it recorded.

They have not taken any statements from anyone who can confirm his violent temper - but it seems that his side has "historical" witness statements. It just doesn't seem right.

He has beaten her before but this is the first time she has gone to the police. She is so scared that now his is going to be really mad. He will also be very smug about escaping prosecution. She said today that she wishes she'd just kept quiet as she now feels like she is the one on trial. I don't know what to do to help her!

make_me_wise

You say she is your boss. So how many other people does the boarding kennels employ? Between you can you cover the place to care for the dogs till she is able to see someone from Womens Aid?

If she is there on her own running the business she is like a sitting duck to this abusive pathetic individual who has already done her so much harm. You can be certain he knows this too and will exploit it.

I would advise her to speak urgently with her gp and see if he/she can offer any advice or support. They have contact with all kinds of organisations. It would also be a good idea to have this attack recorded on her medical records (though that may have been done at the time).

Oooops we posted at exactly the same time OP and I see alot of what I suggested you had already mentioned, sorry!

Darlyd

If he try's to come back, she need's to ignore the door and call the police right away ! It would be better if someone was staying with her. Ans yes my ex served 4 months out of an 8 month sentence for beating me for the last time, because I finally pressed charges. And was not allowed in my town as I had an injunction.