Really worried - told lies & now they're getting social services involved

andreamoss

Hi,

I've been really, really stupid, but now am terrified.

I've been on a forum, and when things were going bad with my husband, I used to post on there, grossly exaggerating the truth, so that I could get sympathy & make me feel better.

I've now received a message from them, saying they are contacting my health visitor, and social services, as they feel that my kids are at risk. Somehow they have got my real details & address (I did give them in private messages to other users, as I met other mums there.

I did exaggerate & say that my husband was violent towards me (he wasn't), and that he took drugs (again a lie).

I don't know why I did this.

Now they are sending off all my threads, and say that my kids are at risk of harm, when nothing could be further from the truth. I've tried to explain to them that it was all lies, but they don't believe me.

I am so scared, I feel sick, and can hardly even look after my little ones right now.

I know I've been stupid, I know that. But it was supposedly anonymous, I understand that they have a duty of care to children they think are at risk, but they are potentially going to tear our little family apart.

I do have a paranoia, and do tend to tell lies, especially on forums, for sympathy. I was feeling really low at the time, p***ed off with hubby, and in my head I was talking to the computer - not real people.

It's got out of hand, they think my husbnad is a drug taker, who beats me up, while the kids were crying in the other room.

I've tried to tell them it's a lie, but they just say that I have problems with boundaries, and that I can't protect my kids from harm, and that I'm lying to protect my husband.

I'm so, so scared, they're going to take my kids cause I lied, and I can't make them believe me

Emmzi

would you rather people didn't care about the kids? TBH I think I would have done the same.

You are going to have to exlain yourself to SS and I would expect have some kind of home visit/ evaluation and probably medical reports.

If it were me I would get myself along to the doctor pronto and be talking about therapy for your issues. Being seen to be taking it seriously will paint you in a better light.

And I would fess up to hubby now so he is not surprised at being questioned.

Ames

I had something similar happen to me, except they blew the truth I was saying out of all proportion, they phoned the police and my ex was arrested. Their reaction when I tried to tell them that they'd overreacted meant I took an overdose and ended up in hospital.

Forums are a two edged sword.

rachbc

andreamoss wrote: »

Hi,


I do have a paranoia, and do tend to tell lies, especially on forums, for sympathy. I

and I suspect his is just another part of whatever game you are playing....

candygirl

You reap what you sow.What's the point in lieing on an internet forum?:eek::eek:

melancholly

well if there's no truth to the suggestions, then nothing bad should happen. it probably is time to consider what you put out on the internet (particularly personal information). perhaps you should own up to whoever sent you the message?

System

I think the only thing you can do is a)prepared to be questioned and explain yourself fully, b)see your doctor and discuss your problems with them and c)try to be careful about what you post on forums in the future.

leos-mummy

If your kids are looked after then you have nothing to worry about. social services will see that from the way u run your home. if there is no police evidence of violence from ur spouse then they probably wont have much to go on and i dont believe paranoia is a valid reason to have kids taken of you. apologise and make them aware things were exagerated... trawl forums to see if u can get other evidence of people exagerating. its probably a common thing. the internet isnt policed. often people create an entire fantasy life on the internet seperate to their real life for whatever reason. obviously your real life is what matters and social services should judge that not an internet life

All the best

Ada_Doom

Hmm, this is a strange one. There is a part of me that worries that maybe this is a lie, and that you are trying to wind up posters who come onto these forums to share their problems, those women who are in violent relationships and may now worry that by sharing on a public forum social services are somehow going to come and take their kids. But that would be bloomin low so lets assume you are telling the truth.........

You will have to expalin to ss what has been happening. If your kids are not at risk, they will visit once and that will be it. What I would say is that maybe you need to seek some help for your attention seeking behaviour and maybe step away from the computer for a while. I know that is easier said than done as virtual friends can be so much easier than real life ones but maybe this will be the wake up call you need. I really hope you manage to get some help, and don't be scared of ss, just be honest with them.

moomoomama27

I personally think the worst that will happen is a visit and questions from SS. They will have to follow up wt a visit if someone has made a phonecall voicing concern. TBH though it's only down to the written word, and if there's nothing to back up any of these 'exaggerations'', then there's not alot to go on.

If you think that your paranoia is becoming a big problem, please seek advice, because it can be no fun feeling this way. There are people that can help, your GP will be the best place to start.

Try not to worry too much, you have recognised that you have made an error, and SS will see that your children are not at risk orf violence, or drugs around them. Be careful in future. Tis is not the sort of attention you want.

Errata

You're clearly unwell and 'can hardly even look after my little ones right now'. Accept all the help you are offered by social services.