Help....not sure what to do.

Errata

All the bloke's lies are designed to make him look like Mr Wonderful; sounds like a somewhat disordered personality rather than ASD.

blue_monkey_2

Errata wrote: »

All the bloke's lies are designed to make him look like Mr Wonderful; sounds like a somewhat disordered personality rather than ASD.

But it is not just the telling lies, if it was then I would agree. To make himself appear as Mr Wonderful he would have to take more care of his appearance to give that overall picture. Not bathing for 10 days isn't making himself seem that wonderful.

And once confronted with the lies, most people would usually stop or confess, not carry on with the lie.

The OP also said that he lacked common sense and seemed not to know what to do with the children and around the house.

If it was just telling lies then I would agree with you, but it isn't, there is more to it so it runs a little deeper than this.

These were the other bits that also stood out for me which made me think there was something more.

confused2011 wrote: »

Anyway the years go by we have our yearly discussion about how it is not working out and that we are drifting further apart. We haven't had sex for about 4 years now. He sees this as a rejection at times although up until a year ago he kept pesturing me. I tried to tell him that I can not get close to someone who lies and keeps lieing to me, who only showers every 10 days and has bad breathe!

My trust in him has gone and he knows that. My biggest thoughts at the moment are that it is not getting any better and we are like to people sharing a house. He says he loves my very much yet is hopeless when it comes to birthday/xmas and even needing common sense help sometimes looking after our kids. I just don't know if I love him anymore and am worried about staying with him for another year and many more.

We own our house and when we bought it I was looking after the girls so never went on the mortgage, but think I am on the needs. We have no savings.

I am so confused in how I feel and not sure if what I feel is true or my love for him is blurred by all this let down etc. He does not hit me or abuse our children. He has took out a laptop on HP without me knowing and got a skyboxplus when we decided we were not and other things too. He does not really listen to me and even I have given up talking to him about things that matter as he always seems to throw it back in my face. he likes his own way and does not like anyone who has a differing opinion and his always has to be right.

My post must seem very bitty but I am writing as I am feeling. I don't like to be near him and harldy ever kiss him properly. We still kiss cheeks when we go out but that may be out of habit. He even gets offended and takes on victim mode if I make a cuppa and don't ask him, although mostly I do.

I think that BOTH of them need to go to counselling to deal with this, IF the OP thinks her marriage is worth saving. It's not all about raised voices but also the atmosphere in the house too, kids pick up on that kind of stuff and there are a couple of children involved here too.

Tygermoth

Hi Jackie47,

I too met a fella on the intyweb about 10yrs ago (if not a bit longer) and amazingly he told me he'd been shot in Iraq and Ireland, then went on to be a diver doing secret stuff and finally being a bodyguard to the rich and famous (namely Princess Di lololol). He also told me he looked like Grant Mitchell - Called himself Ade?

Think we may have been seeing the same fella.

Idiot man lolz.

Tygermoth

Jackie47

Tygermoth wrote: »

Hi Jackie47,

I too met a fella on the intyweb about 10yrs ago (if not a bit longer) and amazingly he told me he'd been shot in Iraq and Ireland, then went on to be a diver doing secret stuff and finally being a bodyguard to the rich and famous (namely Princess Di lololol). He also told me he looked like Grant Mitchell - Called himself Ade?

Think we may have been seeing the same fella.

Idiot man lolz.

Tygermoth

:eek::eek::eek::eek::eek:

Think we may have been!!!!...it's a small world...it wasn't you that rang me up to verify that he was who he said he was was it?...lolololol

lynzpower

OMG please tell me you are both joking and you did not both the same guy,.... no way! :rotfl:

noodledoodle78

Amazing.....:rotfl:

Alias_Omega

This is better than brookside..

Please update us..

Jackie47

lynzpower wrote: »

OMG please tell me you are both joking and you did not both the same guy,.... no way! :rotfl:

Don't know about Tygermoth but I'm not joking...don't think she is either as she knew his name! :eek:

This could be fun...lol :rotfl:

blue_monkey_2

Hysterical!! :rotfl:

You have to wonder how many more there were. :eek:

nzmegs

Why do people lie like this? I also had a similar bloke in my life. I was living in NZ at the time. Told me he had lived in the UK as a child and teenager, had attended a Specials concert here (we were big fans) then he told me he had had a child with someone in this country - a daughter who he had no contact with. This was all lies as his mum told me he had never been out of the country. he even spoke in a semi Londonish accent...
Then I was told he had been abused by his step father as a child and that this expains all of his problems. this may have happened but i couldn't be sure due to all the other lies. But i didn't want to waste my time trying to find out. He was also mean and manipulative. Liars have a deep down insecurity and will take that out on everyone they meet.