Those who are waiting to TTC

browneyedbazzi

ellie - they do say that being in good physical condition makes it easier to get pregnant and also makes the pregnancy and labour easier. It seems like we hear a lot of horror stories about births because people feel a need to share those but people who have good experiences don't as much. My friend who had a baby girl recently (her first) had a really positive labour and delivery - she said there was pain, but that it wasn't nearly as bad as a lot of people had made out it would be...and she's a total wimp lol. I used to be terrified of the idea of giving birth, but I'm getting more comfortable with the idea now.

Ellie83

browneyedbazzi wrote: »

ellie - they do say that being in good physical condition makes it easier to get pregnant and also makes the pregnancy and labour easier. It seems like we hear a lot of horror stories about births because people feel a need to share those but people who have good experiences don't as much. My friend who had a baby girl recently (her first) had a really positive labour and delivery - she said there was pain, but that it wasn't nearly as bad as a lot of people had made out it would be...and she's a total wimp lol. I used to be terrified of the idea of giving birth, but I'm getting more comfortable with the idea now.

Thanks browneydbazzi It makes sense what you say about the pain... There is no denying that it looks VERY painful, but it seems to me that women who have normal birth experiences tend to forget about the pain very quickly. I guess it's an evolutionary thing? Our species would be instinct otherwise!! :rotfl:

Mortgage_Reduction_Novice

Hi Ellie83 - good luck with getting fit.

I'm also the kind that keeps saying we'll try when this is right and when that is right. At the moment it's getting a job closer to home because I can't comprehend commuting over 2hrs a day either pregnant or with a baby to take to a childminders!

Chakani

Ellie, I was so frightened of labour when I was pregnant with my first that it overshadowed my entire pregnancy. Browneyedbazzi is right though, people talk about bad experiences far more than about good ones, just like reading reviews on a website!

There is no denying that giving birth hurts. It does. But, in a way it's a positive pain. It's not like an injury or illness, where the pain is going to go on indefinitely. It's a short term pain, and as soon as that baby is out, all the pain stops.

Also, remember that labour isn't agony from the first contraction until the baby's out. Usually early contractions are just a bit uncomfortable, so while you might feel a bit fed up, it's not usually the screaming agony that you see on documentaries, never mind what you see on films. They gradually increase in intensity through the labour, and there is plenty of time to decide at which point you would like pain relief, and what sort. And you can change your mind as you go if you need to. You never know how you will find it until you're there.

I thought I would be terrible and screaming for an epidural, but when the time came, I found to my surprise that I wanted to be in control more than I wanted to be out of pain, and in the end delivered both my babies with gas and air (and water the second time). I am pregnant with my third at the moment, and I'm planning to give birth at home in a birth pool, and to be tucked up afterwards in my own bed, with tea, and bread fresh from our bread maker, with my three children to cuddle. Doesn't sound so terrifying when you put it like that, does it?

optimistic-mummy

hi all can i join you please, myself and DP are planning to start trying. in the new year or as soon as the debt is cleared. my pill runs out in december my aim is to have the debt paid by then. if not OH will use condoms while we're still paying the debt off and my body gets back to normal. and as soon as the debt is either completely cleared or down to £100-£200 we will no longer prevent it and just hope for the best. xxxx

browneyedbazzi

Welcome optimistic-mummy! December isn't far off at all so not too long to wait for you

I'm disappointed today because I was supposed to be meeting up with my friend who has a 4 week old and she cancelled because her boyfriend said she wasn't allowed out...grr! I really struggle to understand their relationship because before she met him she was a really strong independent woman and now she seems quite accepting of his controlling behaviour. It's not as though she doesn't see his behaviour for what it is either - she totally does - but for some reason she won't stand up to it. She's lost other friends due to arguments about him and his behaviour but I've tried really hard to stay friends and not judge or argue about him (mostly because I think he's trying to whittle away her group of friends and I won't let him win and I also think that one day she'll probably need a friend and I want to be there for her). Today after waking up early to get a bunch of stuff done and get ready in time to drive the 2 hours to see her only to be cancelled on as I was getting in my car to set off I've found it really hard not to be angry at her for accepting his behaviour!

Rant over, I feel a bit better now!

trina2010

Bazzi that really sucks, only the only tiny plus side, at least you found out before you left home! imagine how much worse it wouldve been an hour later if you were halfway there! Its so frustrating though to see someone being controlled like that, maybe its just me but i dont belive you can have a truly happy relationship without having friends to spend some me time with!
hopefully she'll see sense soon enough. though a girl I work with is like that, he's in total control, and a total ......i cant even say it! the minute things get tough he walks out on her, e.g. she got pg, had a devastating mc and he walked out the next day and they were engaged at the time. but she wont see sense, shes too busy defending everything he does.

well an update from my appointment saga, i called and i emailed and got no response, however I have discovered that there is a drop in clinic on a Thursday evening in the next town which does removals, so hopefully ill get in there in the next few weeks...woo!

browneyedbazzi

trina - there's always a positive side to any situation, you just need to find it. The positive side to today's experience is that I ended up with a free afternoon to bake I've made some sausage rolls for our picnic in the park tomorrow, a carrot cake with cream cheese frosting and a vanilla sponge (which has gone in the freezer for future use when I fancy some cake). Also an MSE afternoon because I've used up all the stuff in the fridge that was in danger of going off lol

As far as my friend's relationship goes, I'm not sure what will happen there. They've been together for years now and I think she likes his behaviour in a perverse kind of way...it's like she thinks his behaviour proves that he loves her, because he wouldn't be bothered about where she went etc if he didn't really love her. Does that make sense?

Good to hear you've found a solution to your mirena removal problem!

optimistic-mummy

browneyedbazzi wrote: »

Welcome optimistic-mummy! December isn't far off at all so not too long to wait for you

hiya all, how is everyone. thanks hun. no not long now ive wanted another since our son was 12 months old, so been waiting nearly 3 years for DP to come round. its so close, i cant believe it. we think we can clear the debt by dec/jan so im trying my hardest to have it cleared by then. im really exited, ive started decluttering as we are only in a 2 bed flat but its not tiny. just feel that i need to have a decent clearout, lol, xxxx

sammy_wheeler

hi all
been a while since i have been on here!- got married last year- and was due to start ttc last dec- things happened and we delayed for a year- so we are meant to start ttc in dec this year- 14 weeks away- and i cant wait!
i am going to start folic acid next sat (1st sept) and we have been buying some stuff for baby/nursery.
cant wait