MONEY MORAL DILEMMA: Would you lend to a friend in need?

Sharp_Eyes

stogiebear wrote: »

In this scenario there are two life long friends who have been through 'thick and thin' together. One has 'squirreled' away her stash and the other has kicked the leaves and is now in trouble...If the friend has now come begging from you it's time for a white lie that can't be refuted...

Here's my reply...

"Oh my God... I wish you had asked me about this two weeks ago. I would have happily given you the money. But now I've just gone and tied up ALL my money in a tax free long term gilt bond"

(Whatever the hell one of those is I don't know!)

The result is that you have shown willing to help out a friend but you absolutely can't. Your friend can't actually prove that you are full of poo poo!

Problem solved...

I LOVE it!!! Note to self to use this in future

I've lent money numerous times to friends always hoping the outcome would be different. I have NEVER had any of it paid back for either one of several reasons:

1. They pick a fight with you over nothing and then storm off hoping to never have to talk to you again or pay you back
2. They take the money and run, never call/write etc. hoping to never see u again or have to pay you back
3. You ask them for repayment and they say, "What money?" trying to convince you that they've either never borrowed it or already paid it back hoping to never have to pay you back
4. They try to make you feel small for asking for it back, "If you wanted it back right away why'd you even bother to lend it to me? You're going to ruin our friendship over X amount of money?"
5. They try to make you feel rich "Well you have such a great job/loads of money in the bank etc. you don't really need it..." [bearing in mind that they don't know how much you earn or what you have in the bank....their thing is that if you have it to lend then you must be 'well off']
6. Even if you don't remind them about it, they avoid you like the plague anyways because they were either using you in the first place or are embarrassed because they don't have the money to pay you back.

I agree that most times if you lend money to a friend you lose both the money and the friend, and personally I really resent people who borrow money and then still continue on with their flashy lifestyles after borrowing it....new clothes, shoes, cars, phones, laptops etc. while you are still scrimping and penny pinching.

Chrysalis

I have now had a change of view on this and will probably feel angry for some weeks.

Over the past few weeks I have been lending my sister money for bits and peices here and there, she gave me reasons which sounded plausible (most recently it was her bank account supposedbly been frozen as police were investigating a burglary from her house and a laptop was stolen) for needing the money and every single time she was either late paying me back or still hasnt paid me back. The final straw was when she borrowed £100 of me which was apperently to get her car back from the garage and I was supposed to get the money back later that day which I didnt.

She managed to drive herself down to my parents and suddenly yesterday her account was unfrozen and she then started saying she cant pay me back yet because too much stuff is going out of her account which she claimed she hasnt used for 2 weeks. Its worth noting she is on over 20k a year and has a tenant paying her rent, all her recent bills have been paid because she has borrowed money of me and my dad to pay these bills. I have come to the conclusion she is simply not bothered and thinks its ok to string me along I am in the mess myself now because of this as I am only on benefit income myself my dad thinks little of it and thinks its ok for my sister to mess me about so lesson learned cant trust noone.

vodkajelly_2

If you know that someone will repay the money, then lend it, but have a written agreement beofre handing over the dosh. Even if it's for £100. My mum lent me £5000 one time and made me get an insurance policy out, naming her as the beneficiary, so that if I DIED she would not be out of pocket. Like others here, she could afford to lend, but not lose the money. The insurance policy cost me £5 a month til the loan was paid off. In America you hear about people taking life insurance policies out on other people, but not over here, I wonder why not...

Mary_Hartnell

Is there a tax complication involved in taking the benefit of someone else's life insurance?

Taffybiker

I would have shown my friend how to deal with money years ago.

albion9999

trippy wrote: »

Yes I would. That's what friends are for and it would be nice to be in a position to be able to help someone really in need. It's a no-brainer for me. Do you want £10k or no friends?

Hi I recently met a Romanian girl
I was crazy about her and started a relationship
I had been warned that as a nation they are money mad
I didnt mind I gave her money and never expected it back
It ran into thousnds of pounds including £1800 allegedly for her education
The relationship and friendship finished when I told her there was no more money
Draw your own conclusions