Get annoyed with parents

luxor4t

bluebag wrote: »

I am a mum and a whinger and not at all laid back, I twitch and fuss about everything. My kids are still living with me.

Please tell me what I am doing wrong?

"You have chosen to come home - and it's your mother's home too. If she wants to complain about the noises or smells that stop her from enjoying her home, then either put up with it or ..."
Text of conversation between DH and any one of the 3 no-longer-little Luxors, repeated a number of times until they grew up a bit more.

OP, stop judging your mother. You'll be the same one day - it used to be called the 'generation gap'

thorsoak

TheEffect wrote: »

Does anyone get really frustrated with their parent/s?

I left home last year for university and go back home every 4/5 weeks, but every time I do, my mum stresses me out.

I'm very laid back and she is the opposite. She constantly complains when the kids play outside in our street or in the garden next door. I just think they're kids, who cares if they're screaming and playing around.

She complained when someone had a BBQ a few doors down as she had to close her back door due to the smell. I think they're having a BBQ, so what, just close the door!

She complains about her sisters who are on the doll, or other family members. I think who cares, it's their life...

She complains when she here's a bang on the wall from next door (they have autistic children who someones bang against the wall).

And we fell out today, as I was in the bank and a man pushed in front in the line. She told me I'm a walk over and started saying stand up for myself etc etc.... Maybe I should have said something, but I really did not care. So what if I have to wait another two minutes to be seen.

She complains about everything and everyone, no matter what they do.

Maybe it's me and I'm just laid back, but it really annoys me! I do love her a lot, but I don't think I could go back to living at home permanently again!

OP:

Did you ask your mother if she minded you coming home every 4 or 5 weeks after you had left home? Do you ask her if it is okay for you to come home for a certain weekend - or do you just turn up?

You yourself say "I left home" ....so your mother would be entitled to think that she now has some of her life back to herself ...but no, you keep coming back every few weeks - and then roll your eyes at the way she behaves!

How would you feel if someone behaved that way to you. Maybe its YOU who is stressing her out!

TheEffect

Thanks for all the responses. I've really enjoyed reading them.

thorsoak wrote: »

OP:

Did you ask your mother if she minded you coming home every 4 or 5 weeks after you had left home? Do you ask her if it is okay for you to come home for a certain weekend - or do you just turn up?

You yourself say "I left home" ....so your mother would be entitled to think that she now has some of her life back to herself ...but no, you keep coming back every few weeks - and then roll your eyes at the way she behaves!

How would you feel if someone behaved that way to you. Maybe its YOU who is stressing her out!

Despite your assumptions, I actually come back every month for a weekend to help my mum out with her business, as well as to help around the house and see her. I'm pretty sure she enjoys me coming home and I do enjoy it as well, I'm just having a little rant about little things that annoy me about my mother.

sassyblue

TheEffect wrote: »

Thanks for all the responses. I've really enjoyed reading them.



Despite your assumptions, I actually come back every month for a weekend to help my mum out with her business, as well as to help around the house and see her. I'm pretty sure she enjoys me coming home and I do enjoy it as well, I'm just having a little rant about little things that annoy me about my mother.

That's all it is really isn't it, a little rant? I've enjoyed reading this thread and recognising my mum and nan in the posts too.

You know someone like Victoria Wood could turn our mums into fantastic character :rotfl:

kymbo82

Savvy_Sue wrote: »

Crikey, I do hope not in your case! :rotfl:

I know :eek: scary thought but it's role reversal in our situation, I'm the parent they are the children!

Plans_all_plans

JC9297 wrote: »

Why 12 phone conversations in a week if you don't get on?:(

I speak to my mum once a week unless there is anything particular either of us wants to call about that can't wait.

Well that's the hilarious part really: she either rings me back to tell me off for putting the phone down or she'll (on rare occasions) apologise but later in the convo have another rant at me so I hang up again!

She likes to ring me for a row I think. My dad won't row with her (it goes over his head) so she'll call me/my sister to have a go!

Also we live far apart so sometimes I'll ring her for a chat (as I did once this week) and hope against hope she'll be normal...but to no avail!

Savvy_Sue

Sometimes there are advantages to having a mother so deaf she can't use the phone! :rotfl:

Fortunately she does email, after a fashion ...

RadoJo

Perhaps it's just conversation to her - some people don't really consider expressing their negative opinions as moaning as such, just a facet of conversation which tends to provoke more response than other areas. Maybe she isn't asking for you to agree with her or join in the moaning, and just considers her comments to be general chit chat, or a chance to share thoughts with someone to gauge whether she's being reasonable or not?

Souk08

Loved this! My mums a doll but my mates mum is a negative nightmare. My mate is climbing Kilimanjaro in July for charity and when she told her mum she said, wait for it 'A lot of folk fail at that'. My mate has said that even if she needs carrying down on a stretcher, she'll be finishing the trek! She also comes out with gems like 'Oh so your floors not real wood' and 'Those jeans would be nice on a thinner girl!'

elfen

Am I one of the only people who adores their mum to bits? She is one of my best friends, probably helped by when I had my breakdown, she and my dad were always there for me and I know things about her only her, me and my dad know.....Possibly favouritism but she and my dad were happy when I wanted to move back (next Weds...eeeek) although she is a bit mad but I'm used ot that, it's where I get it from.

Now to get the bloody woman to shop shopping in old ladies shops and buy some pretty things for the summer