Leave OH? Advice please

pigpen

If you were my friend.. even if not a close friend I would come get you.. hell, if you lived near me now, tonight, I'd come get you!!!!

Could you ring your dad instead of your mum? Would that make a difference?
Do you have siblings or friends or even a work colleague you could call?

You need to be out of there before this deteriorates any further.

sjc3

I am really hoping the reason the OP hasn't responded for a while is that she has up and gone and got away.

OP if you are still around and are reading all this in a bit of a daze, please know none of this is your fault hun. I imagine reading everyones opinions on your relationship must be very hard. When someone has been treated as you have, demoralised and had their self esteem knocked it can be difficult to see what is really going on. So the responses on this thread may have come as an awful shock to you.

Stay strong, grab back all your self respect and leave tonight.

pupsicola

sjc3 wrote: »

When someone has been treated as you have, demoralised and had their self esteem knocked it can be difficult to see what is really going on.

This is so, so true. My gp finally persuaded me to go along to the police dv unit. I honestly expected them to give me a slap on the wrist, tell me to stop wasting there time and that all relationships have rough patches.

Instead I was told that my children and I were at their highest level of risk, that if we didn't get out immediately it would only end one way. Our house was put on immediate response.

Make this thread your wake up call and go. Dont let things get any worse.

jinky67

Its abuse pure and simple and wont get any better

Bridesmaid83

Sorry I've only read your OP but no woman deserves to be treated the way he's been treating you. End it. NOW. He's a total moron.

Jojo_the_Tightfisted

GET OUT NOW


Before you become a statistic.

foxwales

Sounds like a nut job in my opinion, get out as soon as you can. People like this don't change and don't kid yourself that he is normally nice because you will eventually find your self esteem will drop to an all time low and you will feel you have no power to leave.

Sounds like this is already happening to you as your questioning yourself and your motives for wanting to leave such a nice guy already. Get out and leave this psycho.

*Louise*

While I do't think much of the fact your mum went behind your back and contacted him, its eems that would be the safest place for you to be at the moment. and I would also be asking her to delete his number, so she couldn't try 'sorting' things for you again!)

Once you are out - you need to start working on your own independence and self reliance. You don't need someone who is just going to bring you down.



xx

belfastgirl23

There is obviously something properly wrong with him. Whether drugs, mental health problems or just feeling trapped and not knowing how to respond appropriately.

I'm not as sure as the others that it's a deliberate strategy, it's possible of course, but it's also possible that he has an emotional age of about 5 and can't figure out what he wants.

Either way though the answer is the same. You need to be very very clear with him that this sort of behaviour is not acceptable and you're not going to put up with it. If you think there's any mileage in talking it out then do so. But if you've tried this before and got nowhere then I'd say get out.

As an aside though, you need to be more proactive here. Why didn't you just pack up and go to your mum's? Sitting around waiting isn't good for anyone

Good luck!

Bloomin_Freezing2

What a complete and utter *&!^% - fill that with your own choice of word, I know what I'd call him!

Leave him, simple as. His behavious is odd in the way that he's only nasty sometimes,but the things he's coming out with are just vicious.