how do other mums to little ones manage?

Sallys_Savings

I have a magnet on my fridge that reads.....
"doing housework with kids is like shovelling snow in a snowstorm"

Housework isn't important..it really isn't, as long as everything is hygienic dont worry about bits and pieces being about.

I have been a stay at home mum for 20 years and have absolutely loved it. Once I realised and accepted that I wasn't Super Woman it all became so much easier. People who you think cope don't and are just like you.

Everyone used to say to me however do you manage (I had four children under fives years old) and I didnt think I did. I used to concentrate on things that were important to me....MY CHILDREN.

Take a look on the old style board at "flylady", its housework done in small bits. This might help you. Cook in bulk and freeze meals, If you can organise a menu, shopping it will make life so much easier for you.

You can never grab or buy time back with your children.....so make the most of them now, believe me the time gos so fast. (It doesn't seem five minutes since someone said that to me when my children were young and my oldest is 20 years old now )

All the very best being a stay at home mum..:)

npsmama

I struggle too but wanted to encourage you.

The only thing that works for me is organisation. It requires self-discipline in my case bc I'm not very good at it but it makes a huge difference to my life.
https://www.organizedhome.com has helped me a lot.

I want to be supermum but fail miserably too. I think a lot of us do.

For me letting the hosuwrok go doesn't work bc having a messy house really affects my morale - having said that getting/keeping things in order is a daily battle for me.

Meal planning and online grocery shopping are life savers!

I also do as much shopping online as possible as my little one won't go in the pushchair.

Hope you find a system that works for you. What works for one person doesn't necessarily work for another. Trial and error really - which is why the forums at the above website help and this forum too.

It's worth it in the long run!

roxy7699

Could some kind hearted person point me in the direction of how to get to the oldstyle board with the flylady content - try as I might, sleep is defeating me

rainbowrisin

If it's any consolation, I am a single parent, SAHM to pre-schoolers (2.5 and 14 mths), and I have given up all hope of ever having a clean, tidy "fly lady" type home ever.
I have animals as well, which filth up whichever bits I've managed to de-grot.

I am also self-employed, which pushes the housework even further down the agenda.

The only tips I have (apart from don't take to gin or valium;) ) are:
1. to "do 10 minutes" of whatever needs doing. It's amazing how much can get done.
2. Don't pro-crastinate. If a job needs doing then do it then and there. Don't put it off.
3. Healthy meals - there are zillions of threads on healthy meals on OS. I cook EM the night b4 when the littlies have gone to bed and it's always a one pot wonder (spag bol, casserole, stew) or HM pizza. I freeze half of whatever I make, so I have reserves when the littlies are being monsters. Brekkie is always toast / porridge and fruit. Lunch is always HM soup / s.wiches / fruit with the odd yoghurt or breadstick thrown in. Probably my meals are really boring but I don't care coz the littlies get their 5 a day, the meals are mashable and disectable so suit all tastes, and can be re-heated in minutes when the littlies are tired and miserable. When in doubt, I feed mine bananas.
4. Always, always, always, make sure there are clean, ironed clothes for the moring and "the bag" (you know, the juice / nappies / biccies / extra clothes / phone / purse / keys / wipes / kitchen roll / toys blah de blah de blah) bag is packed and ready.
5. Do things together. Don't restrict the littlies to "littlie things". Mine love to go shopping, help with the house work, care for the animals, etc, and it's amazing how much they learn whilst they're helping. Yes, jobs take a little longer, but the littlies love to help, the job gets done and you all spend time together.
No other tips - except don't beat yourself up. No-one ever looked back on their lives and thought "I wish I'd spent more time being anal about the housework", but I bet a lot of people look back and wish they'd spent more time with their children.
Good luck.

Pink.

roxy7699 wrote:

Could some kind hearted person point me in the direction of how to get to the oldstyle board with the flylady content - try as I might, sleep is defeating me

Hi roxy,

I think that this is the original flylady thread Any other Flyladies around?You'll find the link to the flylady site there.

Since then there have been a few flylady challenges, this is the latest one: Flylady Challenge - Take 4

Pink

sophiesmum_2

Sallys_Savings wrote:

I have been a stay at home mum for 20 years and have absolutely loved it. Once I realised and accepted that I wasn't Super Woman it all became so much easier. People who you think cope don't and are just like you.

Everyone used to say to me however do you manage (I had four children under fives years old) and I didnt think I did. I used to concentrate on things that were important to me....MY CHILDREN.


You can never grab or buy time back with your children.....so make the most of them now, believe me the time gos so fast. (It doesn't seem five minutes since someone said that to me when my children were young and my oldest is 20 years old now )

All the very best being a stay at home mum..:)

SNAP!!!!!!!
i also had four under fives, and my eldest is now 20. i totally agree with the things you said.Looking back I really don't know how i managed to fit everything into each day but it does fall into some routine eventually. I once apologised to the health visitor when she arrived mid baking session and all kids were covered in flour and chocolate icing, lounge was covered in toys,and sink was piled with dishes. I was horrified:eek: she just laughed and said she could see everyone was happy and healthy and was usually more concerned when she went to a house with little ones and never found even a toy untidying the room. Housework can be slotted in as and when, and you can get them to help you tidy away from a young age.
we used to have free range toys all day but the Neighbours theme tune was the signal to pick up and put away(was on earlier then) My youngest is 15 now but still says everytime she hears that music she feels like tidying up:rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: i must have programmed them like pavlovs dogs.:D

As for teaching your child stuff, you don't need to do anything special they soak it up like a sponge anyway. Just describe things as you are going along,talk about colours etc,I used to give mine a plastic tub each and get them to find as many "red" things as they could etc.My eldest DS learnt his colours by 2 watching snooker on tv with his grandad and later learnt mental arithmetic by adding and subtracting darts scores etc.Books are good to encourage reading and to settle them down for bed. baking, painting, colouring, sticking and pasting are all good fun and educational, and gradually they will be happy to spend time doing things with you just nearby. I used to chuck an old shower curtain over the dining room table and let them stick and paint on there.

Just enjoy the time with your kids when they are little, it does go so fast.

sophiesmum

Miss_Cinnabon

Hi know how u feel, most days i have little energy and struggle to fit housework and doing things with lo, he doesnt sleep well ang gets up at 4.30 now!

Since being os i am managing a bit better, planning out meals etc, i have a real prob with getting organised but getting there, my one is 19 months old with 2 elder brothers aged 8 and 7, also a sahm, no toddler groups near us, one 2 miles away but hard to get to it as i dont drive.

I also dont manage out most days as i have panic attacks when i go out alone, normally have to force myself just for the kids, am fine when someone is with me though.

My tips would be spend time with your kids and housework fit it in around them, getting your kids to help, my lo loves empying the washing machine and putting clothes in, he also likes to hoover:rotfl:

A slow cooker is a must, been such a help to me as i put it on in the morning and is ready by tea.

Kyle

stilernin

I was a SAHM, babies are now 27 and 24 and the only regrets are the things we didn't get around to doing together as a family.

The most important thing is your sanity. Do what suits you and yours.

I have skipped through this thread and haven't noticed many mentions of working with friends.

I used to have a regular morning off by working a rota with two friends. Each Tues morning one of us would have all the children from 9am till 12.30. That mum would prepare lunch for everyone, nothing fancy as the priority was watching the children. At 12.30 everyone got the meal onto the table and sat together to eat. A real squash but the children learnt many social skills. Sharing the last of the jelly for example!! There was no one being the centre of attention at the table on a Tuesday.

Every third week was mayhem in your house, but the benefits were great. Time on your own to do what ever you wanted on the other two Tuesdays of course, but the children gained as well by being with the others.

Definitely don't compare yourself with others. I bet they will have cleared up before you arrived in their house and they won't show their bad habits while you are there will they?

Cut yourself some slack and do what feels right for you.

Good luck

hollydays

Theres plenty of time to housework-When they have left home.Trust your own instincts.The dust doesnt get any worse after the first 7 years!Most people just muddle through. ((hugs)) Ps mine are not babies any more.

weegie_2

As a full time working mum I admire anyone who can stay at home to look after the kids - it's hard work!